A Light in the Dark
by discursive
Summary: "Miss Block, do you believe in love?" "Not anymore," she responds flatly. "Mr. Crane, perhaps you believe in love?" "Not a chance." - "I believe your opinions will change." Two worlds are ready to collide... Full summary inside. R&R please.
1. Chapter1: A Literal RunIn

**So this is the beginning of a new story. Clique, as usual- but I'm okay with that. Well then, here we go.**

**Now, I don't like summaries most of the time, so bear with me. I'll give basic stuff that is needed information, but the rest just has to be followed, I suppose.**

**Anyway, once again, here goes. **

**-(0)-**

**Summary:**

"_**Miss Block, do you believe in love?"**_

"_**Not anymore," she responds flatly. **_

"_**Anymore?"**_

"_**I've had my heart broken. All 'love' is, is some kind of sick hope. I don't need that again." **_

"_**And you're sure on this?"**_

"_**I'm sure for now… but check back with me in a month." Massie bites her bottom lip.**_

"_**Mr. Crane, perhaps you believe in love."**_

"_**Not a chance."**_

"_**Oh really?" **_

"_**Why should I? It is just another take on false reality."**_

"_**Should I check with you in a month too?" **_

"_**I don't care." **_

"_**I have a feeling both your opinions will change…" **_

_**What happens when a girl who has her wall up and a guy who was never interested literally run into eachother head on? Guess you will just have to read and find out...**_

**-(0)-**

**This story will be written in mainly Massie's POV, but Landon's will also be added in sometimes. **

**-:-**

**The University of Iowa  
>Hallway<br>Monday, September 12  
>8:45a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I rushed down the hallway. It was only my second week of college and I was currently aiming for my BFA in Creative Writing. Speaking of creative writing, that was the class that I had been speeding towards when it hit me.

I mean, it, or he I should say, literally hit me. I was almost knocked off my five-inch heels and my tote went sailing off my arm and crashed on the floor, dumping its contents lazily.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry," I breathed, reaching down to pick my stuff up at the same moment that he did. I stuffed my favorite paint-splatter notebook back into my bag along with my iPhone 4g, an assortment of pens and pencils, inspirational notecards, a mini-notebook, and various other items.

"Don't be, that was probably my fault," a deep voice drawled.

I looked up and found myself looking into the most striking pair of azures, tinted slightly with green to create an everlasting teal. Instantly, a tingle rushed up my spine and my heart started beating faster. That didn't make me happy, I didn't believe in love at first sight, love in general, or any of the craziness that was going on inside me- not anymore.

"Landon Crane," he introduced, sticking out a hand after recollecting his own bag and standing up.

I gently took it and shook. "Massie Block."

After a few moments I realized that I was staring and blushed. But at least I know that he was soaking it in right back…

Landon, as I had come to know him, cleared his throat at the same time that I shifted position. "Well, uh, I should probably get going," I mumbled.

"Yeah, me too. See you around, Massie," he replied, walking off down the hall.

I started to stride to my next class, desperately fighting to get my mind off him, but it wasn't working so well. The image of his slightly curly side-swept hair, deep and pondering eyes, and upwards height was burned into my mind.

Shaking my head, I silently chided myself. I could not let myself get caught up in the shuffle. It was just false reality, nothing to worry about. Besides, I would probably never see him again. After what Cam had done to me, I certainly was not going to get close to another guy.

I took a quick pause, recollecting myself, and strutted into the classroom, taking my respective assigned seat. My roommate, Alicia, sat down in the seat beside me and grinned.

"So, what's his name?" she asked casually, pretending to look over her nails.

"What are you talking about?" I inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm talking about the guy who caused you, of all people, to be sitting here biting your lip and trying not to smile in that ridiculously goofy way," she explained, looking up at me.

I put out my notebook and lucky purple pen while responding, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

She snorted while pulling out a zebra-printed notebook and fiery red pen. "Massie, come on. It's so obvious," she sighed.

It was my turn to sigh. "I'm not even going to think about it anymore. I told you, relationships are off limits for me courtesy of me."

"You can't always dwell on the past. Sure, this Cam guy was scum, but not all of them are! You have to let go…"

"And if I don't want to?"

"Well then have fun in your lonely suppressed life," Alicia admonished right as the teacher walked in.

"Alright, today I want Miss Block to choose the topic for out next stories. You will have one week to write something at least five pages, but up to twenty-five. Massie, choose the genre," Mrs. Booke said, giving me a smile.

The first thing that popped into my mind came out before consulting the mind to mouth filter. "Romance."

Alicia snickered and I banged my fist down on my thigh.

"Ah, finally somebody is willing to recommend that. Thanks much, darling," she replied in her unknown accent.

Everybody got to work while I timidly at first set up a plotline. I noticed halfway through that it all related to that mornings experiences, but it was too good and too late to restart. The anticipation in my veins grew as I continued to do what I loved so much.

Before I was ready, the class was over and I was bustling to a different side of campus, switching out my Literature book on the way.

When I got there, I was shocked to realize that Landon was in the same class, fiddling with a pencil in the back. He looked up and cracked a smile in my direction, one lone dimple appearing.

The professor went to the front of the room and launched into a lecture. I took a few notes, but my mind was mainly elsewhere; in other words, my mind was with the guy in the back who was flipping his pencil between his fingers.

With a sigh, I went back to my notes and finished it up.

Soon enough, my classes were over for the day and I went back to my dorm, not surprised to find Alicia just barely settling in.

She took one look at my face before beaming. "Now will you tell me who it is?"

"Alicia Rivera, I told you it was nobody," I replied flatly, giving the Spanish beauty a glare before setting down my tote.

"Oh come on, I'm your friend now and you know it. Just tell me who it is," she urged.

"His name is Landon…" I managed, looking away.

"Wait, Landon… as in Landon Crane?" she inquired with a grin.

"Uh, yeah." I could feel my palms start to get just barely damp.

"Oh wow, I'm surprised. Didn't expect you to end up going for the one guy who every girl wants but not one girl gets," Alicia sighed, smiling again.

"And that's a good thing? Besides, I'm not getting into anything. Want to go get dinner or should I move on without you?"

"We are finishing this conversation later," she demanded, grabbing her own purse while I grabbed mine and we headed out.

The dining hall wasn't very far away, and we got there in plenty of time, picking up chicken Caesar salads and making our way to the front corner table. Chris Plovert, Derrick Harrington, Josh Hotz, Kristen Gregory, and Olivia Ryan were all already there, waiting for the two of us to join them.

"Massie met a guy," Alicia announced immediately, sitting down beside her boyfriend, Chris.

"Alicia, would you just shut up?" I groaned, popping the top off my water bottle.

Olivia giggled and Chris and Josh both shook their heads. "You will be telling me about this later, Mass," Olivia informed, grabbing Josh's hand under the table. The two of them were sickening sometimes.

"No, I'm not telling anyone anything if you're going to act like this," I claimed. Using the plastic fork, I stabbed a lettuce leaf and chewed thoughtfully.

Alicia rolled her eyes and Olivia snickered again.

All of a sudden, another male sat down beside me. Kristen exchanged a knowing look with her boyfriend, Derrick. Josh was still holding Olivia's hand. Alicia was smirking and holding hands with Chris.

"Hey, Landon, what's up?" Derrick instantly greeted, reaching out to high five him.

I sputtered, nearly choking on my lettuce. Landon, the earlier unidentified guy, looked over at me with raised eyebrows. I looked away, and Alicia giggled.

"Didn't I run into you earlier?" he inquired, still looking at me.

"Literally," I answered, leaning back in my chair and checking my iPhone.

The rest of the table looked confused, but I was suddenly too hyped up to talk to anyone with more than one word answers. Specifically, the girls were staring at me and the guys were staring at Landon. I kept my mouth shut, however, not wanting to cause problems.

My stomach was in a fit of knots, tangles, and butterflies… odd. I took a bite of my salad, but pretended to be focused on my phone still.

As if on cue, my phone rang and I shrugged, gratefully dumping the rest of my salad, grabbing my purse, and speed walking towards the exit, already on my phone.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Dining Hall<br>Monday, September 12  
>5:23p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I watched her leave with that same burning interest in my brain. Every movement she made seemed timed and graceful. Her hair swept down in slight waves and every feature seemed delicate but unbreakable at the same time. And those eyes… I thought I was going to get lost.

All my life, girls were swooning, but I was never interested… ever! I didn't care, they didn't matter. I'd had relationships, but made sure they never got to a certain point, I just couldn't do it. And then this girl comes around and I started feeling like a freaking fluff-ball.

"Hey, Landon, you still there?" Derrick's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, sure, whatever," I responded, taking a drink of Gatorade.

"Oh, no, you can't tell me that those two…" Chris started, turning to face his girlfriend.

"Not yet, there are some things I just can't say," Alicia complied.

I sighed, falling back into my thoughts. Ever since I'd run into that Massie girl earlier, she'd been the only thing on my mind, and that was saying a lot considering how much I normally overthought. She was gorgeous, that was for sure.

The girls said goodbyes to their boyfriends and left. I stood up along with Derrick, Josh, and Chris and tossed my half-eaten food in the trash. Before I could say anything or protest, I was being steered and pretty soon ended up in my dorm room that I shared with Derrick, surrounded by him and the two other guys.

"What?" I spat, leaning back against my bed.

"We need an intervention. It's been one day and I already can't stand this," Josh announced.

"Can't stand what?" I questioned, kind of confused, but having a pretty good idea.

"So, you finally found somebody who interests you," Derrick prompted, sitting down on his bed. All of us were from Westchester, but they'd gone to some private school.

"Just drop it," I sneered, slamming my Droid down on the bed.

"Alright, you two have a good night. I'll be busy trying to weasel information out of this one," Derrick sighed, ushering the other two out. They just shrugged and left.

Giving me the stare down, Derrick was starting to make me feel uncomfortable. "Now, I expect you to tell me everything about Massie that you like or I will pry it out of you."

I frowned. "There isn't anything to tell."

"Not anything, just everything. Seriously, I'm not just messing around."

"I don't know, Derrick! For God's sake, I just kind of crashed into her in the hallway this morning and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her. It's like a taste of imperfect perfection," I grumbled.

Derrick grinned. "You really like her, dude."

"No, I don't."

"Maybe you love her…"

His suggestion set me off. "Love. Is. Not. Reality," I relayed flatly.

"Really? So if I ask you that tomorrow, will you say the same thing?"

I thought about it for a moment, and sighed, burying my face in my hands. "Probably not…"

"Then ask her out or something; do something about it," Derrick urged.

"Have you gone mad?"

"No," his tone was flat yet full of mischief at the same time. He snatched up my cell phone and grabbed his. I lunged for it, but he easily avoided it.

Derrick sent out a text message and my eyes went wide. "What did you just do?"

"Sent a text to Massie. I got her number off my phone and now you have it. End of story."

I grabbed the phone and read the text message, shooting daggers at Derrick.

**Landon: Hey, Mass, it's Landon. Lunch tomorrow?**

I reread the text and resisted the urge to get up and punch him. After a few minutes of loud silence, my phone buzzed.

**Massie: I'd love to. How about 12? I'll see you then. (:**

"You can thank me later," Derrick shrugged, a huge smirk spreading across his face.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Monday, September 12  
>6:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Alicia freaking Rivera, what the hell did you just do?" I screeched, looking in disbelief at the screen of my iPhone.

"You will thank me later," she giggled.

I groaned and shoved my face into my hands. Hooking up my iPhone to a charger and point-blank ignoring Alicia, I set up my laptop and started watching a movie. By the time I was on my second movie, it was about eight-thirty at night. Alicia sat down beside me and closed my laptop.

"What happened between you and this Cam guy that disables you from relationships?" she urged.

I cringed and sighed. "I got cheated on. And to make it worse, it was my 'best friend', Dylan Marvil. I believed in love then, you know. But after he broke me, not staying long enough to pick up the pieces, all love became to me was a derogatory, unreasonable, and fake statement that can and will only set you up for trouble."

"Massie, you can't let this fear rule your life. Live a little."

"Alicia, that's just it. The only thing I can fear is fear itself. I'm afraid to trust again and I'm scared of being afraid of it. It's a big, jumbled, confusing mess and it can't be fixed."

"It can't be or you won't let it?"

I sighed and looked at her. "Both. Alicia, I've but up this wall for so long, who in the world would want to take the time to break it down?"

"You know Massie; all I can really say is that when that person is there, you're going to have to let them. You will know who it is and you can't let yourself believe that you're still broken. Cam Fisher is your past and you have a bright future. Now, we both have a free day tomorrow, so rest up because I have plans for you," Alicia finished turning out the bedroom lights and crawling into her own bed.

I pulled on my pajama pants, a long sleeve V-neck, and my Etnies. The only thing I could think of to do was clear my head.

**-:-**

**Okay, so that was the beginning of a new story. Any thoughts? I have an idea… you can you that little review button right down there. Hint, hint, haha. Anyway, please do let me know and story alert possibly.**

**Smiles.**

**SDOW**


	2. Chapter2: Writing, Filming, and Dining

**Last chapter, by free day, I meant that they didn't have classes. I don't think I made that very clear… but anyway. Chapter two…**

**Another thing is that there are two signs. One is -:- That is like switching to a whole different scene. The other is –(0)- Which is used to switch POV's or skip ahead a little bit in time. **

**-,-'-,-'-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Monday, September 12  
>9:45p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I pulled on a UI sweatshirt and my white knit Uggs, slipping into the dark night.

The air was cool; the sky a deep, velvety blue with little stars twinkling like diamonds. A few lamps that surrounded the building were on, but mainly I was going by moonlight.

I'd often found that being out at just the right time, or being in my favorite place, easily triggered inspiration. I was allowed to let my thoughts wander away and my head clear it of all the leftover jumbles.

Ambling along the sidewalks, my head cleared and I sighed in relief. Ever since I had gotten to UI, my mind was constantly cluttered. The only thing that ever stopped it was when I was doing my writing assignments. Which, granted, I normally had every night, but it wasn't the same as it was at OCD in New York. I had figured it would be different, but it was even stranger than I thought it was.

Frowning, a wave of nostalgia hit me and I sighed. Iowa City was an obvious change from Westchester, and I usually took it pretty well. That night though, I just kind of longer for my mother's voice and motherly encouragement and advice. I made a mental note to call her the next day.

And then there was always the background thoughts that pushed there was into my recently empty mind. Alicia had set me up for lunch with Landon Crane. I didn't want to be totally rude about it, because I was secretly a bit excited, but at the same time I was not happy about it. I'd vowed not even to think about guys that way again, let alone get stuck in deeper than a few dates or something.

Sometimes, I wondered why Alicia was brought into my life…

And with those last thoughts, I shook my head clear of it again and went back to my dorm. I was more than ready to sink into my bed and slip into a dim, dreamless sleep.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Dining Hall<br>Tuesday, September 13  
>8:10a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

That morning, I'd taken my shower and gotten dressed, heading down to breakfast with Alicia rather than skipping it par usual.

Alicia was half-watching me while I sipped coffee and slowly ate my yogurt. That day, the skies were clouded over and rain drizzled, becoming a heavier downpour every few minutes. Olivia and Kristen came over and sat down with us, joining Alicia in the stare down.

I froze, my coffee cup only halfway to my mouth. "What?"

"Oh, you know what," Alicia responded with a smirk.

"Uh, sure I do…"

"You've got that _look_ on your face again," Kristen noted in her bell-like tone.

"What is this look that you guys keep referring to?" I was kind of confused.

Olivia finally piped up. "It's kind of like you're ogling at your own thoughts. And like Alicia said yesterday, you've been trying not to smile- whether you are oblivious or not."

I snorted. "Lies." Although, in my gut, I knew it was probably the spot-on truth.

Alicia giggled. "Whatever you say."

I glared at her and stuck another spoonful of strawberry yogurt into my mouth.

"Hey, is it just me, or does Massie look even more dressed up than usual?" Kristen put in with a grin.

"And now you're going on about how I dress… Is there any possible way to get you guys to drop it?" I grumbled.

"Nope," Olivia giggled in her ditzy manner.

"Look at that, the guys decided to make an appearance. Including Landon," Alicia pointed out.

I sighed and sank deeper into my chair, drinking my coffee and ignoring everyone else. Kristen raised her eyebrows at my sudden silence, choosing to avoid further commentary. I suppose that she noticed when my sarcasm levels shot up slightly.

All four guys came waltzing up, taking the same seats as yesterday. When Landon sat down beside me, I automatically turned back to my iPhone and coffee.

"Might as well grab a knife so we can cut the tension," I heard Derrick mutter.

The other couples continued chattering amongst themselves while I downed the rest of my coffee.

"You know," Alicia started, looking at me and Landon. "you two might as well just…"

"Alicia, don't you dare finish that sentence," I warned, already knowing what she was about to say.

She grinned. "I'll make sure to get it in later."

"And what if I wanted to know what she was going to say?" Landon asked me.

"Well then, that's nice for you," I noted sarcastically.

"Well now, looks like someone has a bit of an attitude." He looked pointedly at me.

"You get used to it," Alicia shrugged.

I glared at her. "Whatever. You all have a good day." And with those words outs, I scooped up my tote, slung it over one arm, dumped my cup in the trash, and speed-walked out of the dining hall.

The whole way out though, I could feel one lone pair of eyes boring into my back.

I headed for the little park area on campus, just around the front. Finding one of the recently added benches, I sat down and pulled out my notebook and pen. The pressing matter of our C.W. stories was on my mind. I only had a few pages written, but I wanted to get it done rather than procrastinating. I still had around four days before everyone should technically have had it finished, but it was best to use my free time while I could.

Flipping to the page I'd left off on, I started to cover the page in my somewhat elegant and slanted penmanship. As usual when I had a sudden idea, the words seemed to flow straight from my mind to my fingertips and out through the pen onto the paper.

I noticed that the story I was writing was beginning to reflect more and more of what I had always dreamt of before the word "love" became useless in my mind. Sighing, I continued to write because I knew that by then I couldn't just stop and restart; I had to let it flow.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Film Production Class<br>Tuesday, September 13  
>9:30a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I listened intently as the professor droned on about a new assignment we had. Apparently, our instruction was to film a mini-movie sort of thing. We had six weeks though, so I wasn't all that worried. The only problem would be coming up with an idea; at the time I'd been having major idea-blockage.

"Alright, so I want all of you right now to brainstorm some ideas and then I'll let you out early so you can take your camcorders around campus and film some random pieces," Mr. Caverly announced.

I just nodded and pulled out a composition book and one of the school's pens. Still, next to nothing was coming to mind. Of course, that was probably because there was only a specific person on my mind.

After quite a few sighs and scribbles, I had a few ideas done and followed the rest of the class out the door to go film.

Now, being the lovely student I was, I ambled away from the area's most students were going to, stopping at a certain point and pulling out my phone. What had to be done, had to be done.

**Landon: So, that diner just off campus at noon?**

I drummed my fingers against my school bag and waited for a response.

**Massie: Alright… see you then.**

Sighing, I was glad that I had that out of the way. I still thought that Derrick had gone mad though. He wouldn't take no for an answer.

There was something different about her, and it bothered me. Massie was so… unusual compared to everyone else. I hated the fact that she caused my mouth to always upturn in a crooked grin and my palms started to sweat. It had been almost two days since we'd first run into each other, and now I couldn't be around her without feeling nervous or anxious.

What exactly was I anxious for? For something to happen? For a move to be made? For some random even to occur that would brighten it all and make it all dandy? I didn't have a single clue.

I ran a hand through my hair and glared at the sky. It just wasn't something I believed should happen, or even could happen.

With a final sigh, I pulled out my camcorder and turned it on, looking around for bits and pieces to film: a group of friends laughing, two birds chattering noisily in the trees, a cloud that oddly resembled a split heart, a group of people in drama messing around, and a lot of other small things where you just caught bits and pieces of scenes.

One of the other guys from my F.P. class came up to me with a bored look on his face.

"There isn't anything here to film," he grumbled.

"Have you tried looking around?" I implored.

"Yes."

"Look harder," I scoffed, before stepping around him. He just shrugged his shoulders and continued on.

I continued to go around with my camcorder, just capturing little moments, not the full scene. Although it was all good practice and all, it did not make me ready to do a full assignment yet. It was good that I'd had a month and a half.

At one point, I sat down on a bench to look through my video. The girl I'd sat by glanced up at me, but didn't look long enough to know who I was. I didn't observe her enough to recognize her either. The collection of clips was kind of fun and mismatched, turning itself into something that seemed to fit. I finished it up, snapped the screen closed, and slipped the camcorder into my messenger bag.

By that time, I had about fifteen minutes before noon… and lunch with Massie. The person beside me on the bench stood up and smoothed her outfit. I looked up and finally realized that the "stranger" was really Massie herself. How did I not notice that at first? Obviously though, she still didn't notice me. Why not make myself known?

"Want me to walk you over?" I asked nonchalantly, standing up.

She turned around to face me and I could tell that she nearly jumped. "Uh, sure," she stammered with a doe-like look in her eyes.

Again, my lips turned upwards in grin; and again I internally chided myself. We started walking in the general direction of the diner.

**-(0)-**

**Still on Campus.  
>11:50a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I couldn't help except for be stunned when I turned and noticed that I'd been sitting beside him for at least twenty minutes. Still feeling a bit embarrassed, I am ambled along beside him to get off campus and to the diner.

I really was nervous. After my past experiences, trust would always be a problem with men in particular. It was as if I was in the dark and would never find a light… Or would I? Landon gazed over at me again and something flickered in his eyes. The only describable words that appeared at first were fondness or admiration or… well never mind. It definitely wasn't that. At least I hoped it wasn't.

"So, ever been to this place before?" Landon asked, dragging me out of my thoughts.

"Only once, and that was just to get coffee," I shrugged.

"I've got about the same amount of experience there." He chuckled and I felt my heart beating faster again.

My mouth was shut, enclosed in stark silence because I suddenly felt tongue-tied and incapable of uttering a sound, let alone a word. Unfortunately, he noticed.

"You alright?" His tone rang with concern. I must have had one strange look on my face…

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine," I managed.

"You don't sound very sure on that."

I sighed, "I'm sure."

Finally, we reached the diner and went inside. Opting for a booth in the corner, I sat on one side and he sat on the other. An overly bubbly waitress gave us menus and brought two glasses of water out. I took a sip of mine quietly, finding myself at a loss for words _again_.

"So, what are you aiming for here at the big UI?" Landon inquired, starting small talk.

"My BFA in Creative Writing, but I'll probably try to get past that to my MFA later…" I answered. "How about you?"

"Me? Oh, well, I want my BFA in Film Production and then my MFA later on as well," he responded, flashing yet another one of his grins that was accompanied by the single dimple.

"That sounds interesting. I take it you want to be a director?"

"As much as you seem to want to be an author."

"Spot on then." I found it became a little easier to talk without getting nervous. I still felt that rushing shiver up my spine almost every time I heard his voice though. My palms were a little damp again, too.

"Are you ready to take your order?" the disturbingly friendly waitress asked.

Landon gestured at me to go first. I just ordered a salad. After he ordered, the waitress flounced off. There was a bang and both of us turned to see that someone tried to push the door that clearly said pull and had run straight into it.

"Alright, is it just me, or is common sense not so common these days?" Landon asked, looking amused.

I giggled. "Nope, it isn't just you. I can find quite a few people who agree…" He chuckled and then smiled again.

We started talking some more and the "date" actually passed fairly quickly. By the time we'd up and left, most of my worrying was forgotten; instead it was all just silently nagging in the hidden depths of my mind.

Landon, somewhat surprisingly, walked me back to my dorm. And because of my usual personalities, I started getting the strange feelings again and started mutely freaking out. I thought that I couldn't feel that way about anyone, but for some reason I just couldn't shake the feelings.

We got back to my dorm and stood outside the door.

"Thanks again. That was… fun," I sighed with a small amount of pleasure.

"No problem. Maybe we can do it again sometime," he responded.

The words in my mind forgot to get through the filter again and I couldn't stop my words. "That'd be nice." And of course, my lovely mind added a smile into the mix.

He grinned. "Well then, I'll probably see you at dinner."

"Yeah, most likely." I gulped.

He just kind of waved his hand and left. I went inside my dorm to find Alicia staring at me with a smirk on her face.

"I cannot believe I said that. I practically gave him the okay to ask me out again," I groaned, leaning back against the door.

"Oh, you act like you don't want to," Alicia noted, still smirking.

"You know I can't get into that again," I pointed out. Hadn't I told her enough times?

"Massie, I want a better reason than because of Cam. I told you, he is your past and you need to forget him. Now, give me a better reason." Her smirk disappeared and she was just full on staring at me like I wouldn't be able to think of anything.

I sighed. "And I should tell you this why?"

"Because sometimes you just need to trust somebody and get it off your chest."

My shoulders sagged very slightly. "Alicia, I think it's too late for that. It's been so long that I've been stuck with it, a year to be exact, that I suppose I've just stopped caring."

"Or you're just scared," she noted, crossing her legs.

I paused and looked over at her. "That too…"

"Well, I hope you come to the realization before it's too late."

"Too late for what?" Although, I was pretty damn sure that I already knew…

**-:-**

**Alright, I was planning on making this longer, but decided against. **

**I think I should bring up a few points. I do in fact accept ConCrit, and am not bothered by it. It can actually be quite helpful and/or useful. **

**Another thing is that I'll be doing some skipping. I just figure that some people like a heads up because within a few chapters, I'll be skipping a month, and then eventually another month. We will see how things go.**

**Finally, I'm in the process of another FanFiction, **_**Not So Bad Luck**_**, so it will be a little bit longer than usual in between chapters. I actually kind of finish both before posting, but it depends. **

**Smile (:**

**SDOW**


	3. Chapter3: Sprawled on the Pavement

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Friday, September 16  
>3:45p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

Of course, I was somewhat lucky. My romance story was almost completed. We were told that there would be no exceptions and that it had to be turned in on Monday that morning in Mrs. Booke's class. I was busy finishing up the ending, and then I had to edit it all and it would be done. Although, I would most likely type it all out just to make sure it all worked.

Alicia, for some unknown reason, was up and pacing across the dorm. She was very fidgety, and seemed like she was trying to keep herself busy. For a while, I could take it, but it eventually became too much. Not even my dearest pen and notebook could distract my mind from her disturbances.

"What is the matter with you?" I demanded, looking up.

Alicia paused in her constant movement. "I'm nervous…" She bit her lip.

"I'm all ears," I noted.

"Well… Chris just said he needed to talk to me about something important and we're going to a restaurant not very far from here and I just don't know." Alicia groaned and flopped down on her bed.

"I don't know what to tell you, Leesh. It all depends on a tone of voice."

"I know, but it's hard to tell over the phone," she sighed.

It was quiet again, but I had plans to finish my writing over the weekend; I just couldn't do it right then for some reason. I picked up one of my favorite books, _Lock and Key _by Sarah Dessen. I flipped to my bookmark in my tattered, well-read copy and started reading. Allowing myself to slip into the pieces of a book that I loved so much, everything seemed so much simpler.

Just by reading, I was able to go to an alternate reality and forget about my own troubles. I could forget that my life wasn't easy and I could just focus on everything else. Of course, eventually after the book is closed, the worries come flooding back and there is nothing that can be done about it.

The buzz of my iPhone pulled me out of my little trance. Sighing, I slipped my little makeshift bookmark back in and scooped up the phone. My phone nearly slipped out of my hand and crashed onto the floor. I gulped uneasily, chiding myself for not realizing how soon it would happen.

**Landon: So, are you busy tonight? I heard that this one new movie is supposed to be amazing.**

What was I supposed to say? I would not allow myself to fall into a relationship…

**Massie: If we're going as friends.**

**Landon: Care to explain?**

**Massie: It's complicated…**

**Landon: Oh… okay. **

**Massie: I was hoping you wouldn't give up on me so easily.**

I cursed under my breath after I hit send and smacked my forehead. Did I need a filter for my thumbs too?

**Landon: Well then, do you still want to see that movie?**

**Massie: Sure, why not.**

**Landon: Alright, I'll come by at 7 and we can drive over. See you then.**

**Massie: Likewise.**

I sighed, still wondering what I'd, or rather Alicia had thanks to her texting, gotten into. Again, I pulled out my bookmark and indulged in the world of fiction.

**-(0)-  
>5:45p.m.<strong>

Setting my book back down, I leaned on one side, snuggling against the bed. Alicia had just gotten out of the shower and was frantically buzzing around; doing all the necessities to look perfect in Chris's mind. After a few moments, I stood up and yawned again. Apparently, the dining hall food that I'd just had was making me tired.

Finally, Alicia stopped moving around and sat down on the edge of her computer chair. I laughed at her and she turned.

"What?"

"And you tell me that I get too nervous," I noted with a smile.

"Yeah, well, you refuse to get in another relationship. It's different," she pointed out in a huffy tone.

I stared at her incredulously. And she said that she knew me… Shaking my head, I sat back down on the bed, staring at my slender hands and acrylic fingernails.

It was then that she noticed my reaction. "I didn't mean for that to sound…" Alicia started.

"I know… but you still said it." I snatched up my purse that still contained my dorm keys, car keys, iPod, ear buds, iPhone, and wallet.

"Sorry," she muttered.

With a shrug, I stepped outside and headed for my car. Where exactly was I expecting myself to go? I have no idea, but I didn't know I wouldn't make it far before being stopped.

While I was storming across campus, I pulled my hair up with a clip as my emotions switched between frustration, anger, and even a little disappointment. Once again, my mind was beyond cluttered, and it didn't help that all my emotions were flying.

Taking a break, before I got to my car I sat down on a bench and just breathed. I didn't think; my eyes just stared into space; all thoughts and feelings draining from my brain. With a sigh, I sat staring at my hands with my ankles crossed for around five minutes.

I stood up, ready to just get off the campus. But I never got the chance to. There was a sharp pain and everything went black.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Campus Hospital<br>Friday, September 16  
>10:22p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

My vision was hazed for a few seconds before I blinked the remaining sleep out of my eyes. Confusion settled over me. The room I was in was unfamiliar; and then I realized that it was a hospital room.

Wait, hospital? The only thing I remembered was standing up and then a massive dose of white hot pain. Speaking of pain, my head had been throbbing.

Finally, starting to become more and more aware of my surroundings, I realized that something was gripping my hand. It was a death-grip, but it was tight and somehow gentle at the same time. I turned my head ever so slightly and saw two figures.

I squinted, trying to see through the dark because there was one light on across the room that didn't help whatsoever. After further inspection, I realized that one was Alicia, staring down at her cell phone, her thumbs moving furiously across the keyboard. So if she wasn't holding my hand, who was?

After another minute or so, the other figure became clear. Landon. What in the world was he doing there? Or better yet, why did he have his hand intertwined with my own?

He looked up from staring down at his free hand, catching my gaze with his own. "Massie?" His voice was thick with concern.

I sighed, more confused than ever. "What happened?"

Alicia's head snapped up at the sound of my voice. "Oh, thank God you're awake. I'll go get the nurse," she replied quickly, standing up and striding out of the room.

I groaned as another wave of pain smacked my head. Landon just brushed his thumb against my hand and watched me closely. I still had no idea what had happened or what was going on.

Alicia came bustling back in, followed by a nurse.

"Good to see that you woke up. We will just switch out these cloths," she took off a wet cloth from my forehead that I hadn't realized was there and continued, "and then you should rest more. I know, your head still hurts, but it will go away eventually." The female nurse put on a new towel and skirted out of the room.

Although I still felt weak and quite tired, I wasn't finished. "Alright, will someone please tell me what's going on?" I moaned quietly.

Alicia and Landon glanced at each other. He was the first to speak up. "I went to look for you after you weren't answering your phone and Alicia said you weren't at your dorm. She'd said something about you taking off, so I assumed you were probably somewhere on campus; which you were, just sprawled out on the concrete with your purse lying almost untouched besides you.

"Of course, I called Alicia who called the campus hospital. They came, but woke you up and asked basic questions before doing anything else." He must have noticed the confusion growing on my face because he went further into detail. "You knew the answers, but they said that with the cut on your head you probably wouldn't remember it."

I sighed. "That still doesn't explain how I ended up on the sidewalk…"

Alicia spoke up that time, her tone slow and slightly disturbed. "We don't know. Somebody just attacked you; but the only thing they took out of your purse was your iPhone, wallet, and any jewelry you had in there. I only know that because when they handed me your purse back after 'investigating' it, there was one earring back and I know how OCD you are about those things." She managed a weak smile.

I sighed again, vaguely remembering taking off my diamond studs earlier that day. "Okay, I guess I got it now."

Alicia nodded once. "Oh, and we're the only ones who know currently, other than the hospital, because almost everyone is busy since it's a Friday night. Mainly, they're at the theater. Well, and Chris just knows that I couldn't make it do to personal issues; I didn't want to say anything."

She gave me another half-smile before sitting back down in the chair and leaning back.

"You guys should probably head back to the dorms and get some sleep," I commented, noticing that it was eleven at night by that point.

"I'm good here," Alicia responded, settling further back into the chair. I felt kind of bad, but didn't exactly know how to respond without sounding rude.

"I don't exactly want to leave…" Landon muttered, still holding my hand. It was different, definitely different, but I found myself enjoying it. And what bothered me more than that was that it wasn't bothering me at all; not even a little bit. So yeah, I was essentially bothered, just not by the right thing.

"You still should go and get some sleep if Alicia isn't going to," I urged.

He sighed. "Alright, sleep well Mass."

"You too, Landon."

He let go of my hand and stood up, scooping up his cell phone and hesitantly walking out of the room. The nurse came in and spoke quietly with Alicia before shrugging and leaving.

"You still up to talk a little?" Alicia implored, moving from the corner chair to the one by the bed.

"Yes," I responded. My voice was still quiet and I realized how the tone of my voice had taken on an innocent edge.

"Good, because that was so adorable," she gushed.

"What are you going on about now?"

"You don't know the half of it," Alicia mused, looking over at me with a smile.

"Huh? Oh… oh… I see now." I refrained from giggling at her.

"Well, has your little stubborn self noticed it yet?" A teasing smirk danced across her lips.

"Leesh, I told you before that I won't get into anything like that. Boyfriend/Girlfriend relationships are off limits; you know that," I grumbled.

"You'll change your mind by New Years. I am positive," Alicia deducted, before leaning back into her chair. "Goodnight, Massie."

"Night, Alicia…"

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Campus Hospital<br>Saturday, September 17  
>8:45a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Yes, mom, I am completely fine. There is nothing to worry about," I repeated into the phone. After being instructed to call my mom, I was beginning to wonder if they just wanted to know her reaction.

"_Darling, the second you started my jaw just dropped and I can't help but be worried. I'm sure you understand that," Kendra stated. _

"I guess I do, but I'll be fine. Besides, I've got quite a group switching currently," I sighed.

"_Good. You need to be watched. And yes, after you told me what happened, I had your father on the job. He has everything that needs to be cancelled already done and reordered."_

"Of course, thanks Kendra. I really should get going though, but I'll call you later."

"_Fine, and I am holding your word for that so you can't get out of it."_

"Have a good day, Kendra. I love you," I smiled.

"_I love you too, Massie dear. Feel better," she responded._

I hung up the phone and leaned back with a sigh. Seriously, it was just a concussion. The only thing I had was a bump and a cut and a headache. After extensive looks while I'd been passed out in the first place, the doctor was sure that I was fine other than that.

Leaning back against the bed, I tapped my fake-nails impatiently against the side of the bed. When were they planning to let me leave? At least my headache was temporarily gone.

"Hey look, Block's up," Kristen called suddenly, having recently picked up on Derrick's last name habit. Olivia marched in behind her.

"What are you guys doing here? It isn't even ten in the morning," I reasoned with a raised eyebrow.

"We are taking you away," Olivia announced.

"Oh, well then thank you." I grinned and then we shared a quick laugh. Alicia came in after a few moments with a coffee up to her lips.

I got up out of the bed and after some serious reasoning from the nurse, was on my way.

We exited the medical area and, although I wanted to walk faster, slowly strolled back along to the girls' dorm area. Of course, to do that, we had to get past the guys without running into Chris, Derrick, Josh, or Landon…

Thankfully, we were able to make it past there and up to Alicia and my dorm. I waved Kristen and Olivia off, telling them that I was super tired, which I was. After a few minutes of being curled up on my own bed, my eyelids fluttered shut and I was asleep again.

**-(0)-**

**12:30p.m. **

"_So you're the infamous May-see? Ha, looks like you could use that little wimpy Crane guy with you now, huh?" a voice muttered. I was unconscious mostly, but I could just barely here the voice._

"_No response? Alright, well I'll just be taking these. Hope someone finds you before it's too late." Pause. "Never mind, I don't really care. Have fun…" _

I sat up with a start, and wondered what had happened. Was it just a dream or had I really heard that? And how had I passed out anyway? Sure, I'd gotten hit in the head, but with what exactly? My head was starting to hurt a little again. I just stopped asking myself questions because I couldn't answer them myself.

Looking over, I saw Alicia sitting on top of her cherry red duvet with her legs crossed, typing on her laptop. There was a knock on the door and she playfully rolled her eyes, glancing over at me.

"If I were you, I'd pretend to be asleep. The girls are a lot easier to get through. You're about to have four guys all pounce loudly if you don't," she advised with a snicker.

I obeyed and closed my eyes, slowing my breathing to what seemed like an average sleep rate.

"I brought glitter," Josh, possibly the strangest guy, announced. If I'd had my eyes open, he'd probably be holding up a bottle of the brightly colored specks.

"Dude, I think she's asleep. Shut up," Derrick replied.

"I advise you to listen to Derrick. If you're going to be in here, keep your mouths closed," Alicia warned, slowing down the word _closed_. I had to love that she had the snarky side when I needed her to use it most.

"Alright, alright, just chill out, hon," Chris' voice soothed.

"Well, at least she's finally sleeping," Landon's voice rang clearer than the rest. I wasn't even surprised to feel my heart-rate pick up again.

"Well, I can't stand being quiet for too long. Landon, Alicia, you two stay here. I will direct these other people to get food," Derrick commanded.

"Why us two?" Landon inquired.

"I think it's pretty obvious," Josh answered before Derrick could.

A few pairs of footsteps left and the door closed softly behind them. I felt another weight gently land on the edge of my bed and I could instantly tell that it wasn't Alicia. And for a few, at least ten, minutes, the whole dorm was just silent, but I still couldn't find myself actually falling asleep again.

"Landon, are you okay?" Alicia asked. I could mentally see her, sitting on her bed across the room, scrutinizing him.

"What do you mean?" came his response.

"I mean that you're sitting there looking all wistful and whatnot."

"It's nothing…"

"Oh, I see. Let me guess, you weren't exactly hoping for the whole 'just friends' thing?" I silently cursed her words.

"How do you even know about that?" His tone was filled with question and wonder.

"Because I talk to her about it. She is one of the most stubborn people you'll meet, just give her some time."

"Oh, you have to be kidding me. Alicia!" I sat straight up in bed, ignoring the throbbing reaction from the back of my head.

"You're awake?" Landon jumped up from the edge of the bed.

I giggled involuntarily. "Whoops…"

"Well then, now that that's taken care of, I have work to do. Hushed tones would be greatly appreciated," Alicia said and wiggled her eyebrows quickly at me before turning back down to her laptop. "Oh, and yeah, Massie you are supposed to take your Tylenol or Advil or whatever now."

I sighed and looked on the nightstand. Sitting there was one of the pills and my bottle of water. With a dejected grumble, I stuck the pill in and swallowed it down with the lukewarm water.

"I didn't know you were awake," Landon mumbled, then leaning against my desk.

"It was her idea," I noted, glancing in the direction of Alicia.

"It was in your best interest. I've been there, trust me."

"You two are dangerous together," he sighed, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his Diesel jeans.

With a shrug, I leaned back against the custom purple and blue silk comforter and pulled my knees up. The only noise was varied breathing and the soft clicks as Alicia's fingers flew back and forth across her keyboard.

"You don't have to stand up, you know," I replied, looking around my knees at him after a few moments. Of course, my palms started getting damp again and my heart sped up slightly when I saw him. Since I had more recognition at that point, I was silently cursing my reactions.

"Okay." He just shrugged and moved from the desk to the edge of my bed by my feet again. "So, how are you feeling after that?"

"All things considering, pretty good."

"I heard that they're getting closer to find out who did it."

"Good…" I trailed off as the weird dream came back into my mind.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

I sat back up and put my legs down besides his, sitting up right next to him. "It's just this really strange dream. It kind of seemed more like a recollection…"

"So, they were right then." Landon nodded thoughtfully.

**-:-**

**Love it? Hate it? Think I'm strange? Let me know.**

**Triple L forever. **

**SDOW**


	4. Chapter4: Halloween

**A/N: Thank you guys so much for all the reviews, they're one of the main things that inspire and encourage me to write! You people rock! **

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Saturday, September 17  
>1:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"What are you talking about?" I implored curiously.

"The nurse and doctor both said that in the few cases like this that they see, a lot of people have a subconscious memory of something the attacker might have said," Landon explained.

I gulped when the realization hit me. What I'd heard in my sleep was not a mere dream… My mouth felt dry. Whoever did it had an edge of revenge in mind.

"Are you okay?" His tone was softer, sweeter. I was dimly aware of an arm going around my waist.

More thoughts buzzed in my head, specifically about the dream/memory thing. "I'm fine."

"Massie."

"Can we take a walk or something?" I asked, glancing quickly over at Alicia.

He shrugged and we got up, heading for the door. It was while we were getting up that I fully noticed his arm tucked protectively around my waist. Being my foolish self, I blushed and looked away while he swiftly brought his arm back to his own side.

"Be careful," Alicia advised from the bed. I'd forgotten she was there for a while.

We exited through the white door and stepped into the hallway. From the hallway, Landon and I went through the building and headed outside.

"Alright, so tell me what the thing was about," Landon demanded.

"There was a voice. It pronounced my name wrong, commented on my unresponsive state, said they'd be taking some things, didn't want me to die, laughed like a maniac, said they didn't really care, and then finally told me to have fun," I sighed, leaving out the part about him.

"I'm not a rocket scientist, but I can tell that there is something you aren't telling me."

"Well… they mentioned you. I don't know if it was a dream or not though so it doesn't matter," I dismissed hastily.

"If you say so…" His tone was unsure.

"Anyway, I don't really want to talk about it right now."

"Okay. Let's talk about… Thanksgiving break. What are you going to do?" he inquired. I was grateful that he took it all in stride and changed the subject.

"I think I'm going to take the road trip back to New York. It ought to be fun."

"Really? I knew all the guys were planning to drive, but I didn't know you were too. I still find it weird that all of us come from the same place, yet not all of us knew each other."

"Yeah, all of us, as in Alicia, Kristen, Olivia, and yours truly, are going to drive back there. How about you?"

"Yeah, I'm probably going to drive back there too. I heard that Derrick is driving with Kristen and Josh with Olivia though," he responded thoughtfully.

"Yep, and Alicia is going with Chris. I suppose it'll just be me and my Charger." I added a little shrug.

"What day are you leaving?"

"The first day of break. Everyone else that I know of is leaving the next day, so I'll be a little ahead."

"Don't you think you should have at least someone on the road with you that you know? At least somebody driving beside you," he noted.

"I don't know, possibly. But I should be fine… I think." I bit my lip in thought.

"Well, I was going to leave the first day too. Do you mind if I drove along beside you?" By then we were just ambling along the campus grounds. I took a swift glance at him and noticed that his eyes seemed hopeful and waiting.

"Nah, I don't mind. Just be up early. It's a twenty hour drive and I only want to take two days."

"I'm good with that."

"So the plan is set?"

"That it is…"

**-:- **

**(I hope my notorious amounts of skipping down bother you guys…)**

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Monday, October 31  
>3:50p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

After Massie's big incident, life kind of returned to normal. My miniature film had gone well, and Massie had later told me that her writing assignments were all keeping up just fine.

Of course, we'd somehow managed to stay in the friend zone, despite the occasional hand holding, overly prolonged hugs, and a few other things. I still couldn't shake the strange feeling though, and they seemed to be getting worse. Seriously, at that point I couldn't look at her without some reaction. I was even excited for the eighteenth of November, when I'd be leaving, in a separate car, with Massie to drive back to Westchester.

That day was Halloween, and everybody I knew was planning on going to the huge party that would be spread across the freshmen campus.

The door burst open and Derrick walked in, pulling a very irritated looking Massie behind him. "We are supposed to hold her hostage. Chris and Josh have Olivia. Alicia and Kristen are both getting their costumes," he announced. Massie yanked her wrist out of his hand and glared.

"I still don't see why you guys set it up to let those two girls pick out all the costumes. You realize you're probably going to end up dressed as a French maid or something," Massie grumbled, clearly not happy with the situation.

Derrick seemed to be panicked for a second, but washed it away. "Nah, it'll be fine."

"Is it really necessary to have me stuck _here_?" Her tone was starting to lighten, but all the frustration hadn't completely dispersed.

"Alicia said that we should keep you company, but separate both girls. This situation seemed to fit best," he shrugged.

She shot him a glare and perched on the edge of my desk. She glanced at me. "Am I allowed to murder him? He picked me up at one point."

"Oh, you might regret it later," I told her.

"Of course, you have to be one of the people who have common sense," she sighed.

"I still remember a month and a half ago when I was the one you were always trying to avoid and now I can normally get out of that and get you to go somewhere," I added. We were actually really close friends at that point, but I was slightly upset about it.

Within the month, I'd just started to ignore the heart flutters, weakened knees, damp palms, and all the other stuff, figuring I was just weird. Of course, I still avoided the freshmen girls who always tried to flirt with me. After being with Massie, even as a friend, it didn't feel right.

"Hello? Are you still there?" Massie's voice yanked me out of my trance.

"Yep," I answered.

"He probably won't answer the question anyway," Derrick informed her.

"What question?" I asked, closing my laptop and resting my back on the wall.

"Nothing," Massie shrugged, and then pulled out her iPhone.

I sighed and tapped my fingertips against my bed, not sure what else to say. Derrick was now sitting on his computer chair, Massie was still perched on the desk, and I just kept to myself. Derrick turned and pried open his laptop, powering it up.

Her thumbs sped back and forth on the screen of her iPhone; a slightly waved curtain of hair fell and concealed her unusually beautiful amber eyes; a small smile was on her lips, yet I had no idea why. Just watching her, little butterflies crept into my stomach again and I was secretly (and very slightly) frustrated because I was a guy and that wasn't supposed to happen.

I ran a hand through my hair and looked at her again. She was still typing away. Other than that and the laptop keys being tapped periodically by Derrick, the place was pretty quiet.

"So…" I sighed.

Massie moved from the desk to my bed and looked over at me. "So what?"

"So, does it have to be so quiet in here?"

"No, but that isn't my fault."

"Actually, it's mine. I refuse to let you guys turn on the iHome while I'm working," Derrick grunted, still typing away. Massie burst out laughing. "What?"

"You cannot tell me that you just said that! You used to do that to me all the freaking time!" She grinned as her chortling quieted down.

"Yeah, I know, but we're in college now," he mused turning around with raised eyebrows.

That set off yet another round of giggling from Massie, who obviously couldn't take serious-Derrick seriously.

"Can you do something about her?" he pleaded with a frustrated air to his tone.

I took my hand and covered up Massie's mouth. She instantly stopped snickering, but wasn't exactly pleased. For a second, I actually thought she was going to bite me, but instead she reached both hands up and yanked my hand off.

"For future reference, it's easier just to tell me to stop laughing," she growled.

I'll remember that," I assured.

Idle chit-chat started as we waited for more time to pass.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Monday, October 31  
>7:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I stared at Alicia like she was crazy. She really expected me to dress up as some pirate girl thing that was a tad bit on the short side?

"Put it on," she coaxed, tossing me the outfit. I looked at it warily.

"Come on, look what I have to wear! You do not have it bad," Olivia sighed, stepping out. What was she supposed to be, a pixie?

"You have to wear it," Kristen acknowledged with a grin.

With a sigh, I took the outfit and went into the bathroom. I slipped into the thing and shook my head after I looked in the mirror. It only went down to a few inches above my knee… I turned on my curling iron and put large, loose spirals in my hair and added a touch of hair serum and hairspray. Olivia walked in just as I was started my makeup.

"Can you believe that they're making us do this?" she groaned, reaching for the straightening iron.

"Actually, I can. Do remember that they've wanted revenge ever since that summer costume party before school started," I stated, adding MAC eyeliner and shimmery gold dust. Olivia continued to pull the iron slowly through each layer and section of her thick, buttery blonde hair. I put on a layer of lip gloss and walked back out.

"So, I see you've gotten into the spirit of things," Alicia noted.

"I didn't say I liked the outfit, but I did however make it look presentable," I responded, pulling on the little suede, high-heeled booties that went with the outfit.

"Olivia, are you almost ready? It's about time we leave. The guys are picking us up in ten minutes," Kristen called, leaning against the bathroom door.

With another sigh, I pulled on the pirate hat gingerly over my hair. Olivia busted out of the bathroom and went over to get her own shoes.

Ten minutes later, as predicted, there was a knock on the door. Kristen was strapping on her shoes, Alicia was fluffing her hair for the fifth time, and Olivia was adjusting something on her outfit; I had no choice but to get it.

The line of four guys was waiting outside of Alicia and my dorm room door, all in their chosen outfits. The other three girls all stood up and one by one exited the door. I slipped outside the door last and clicked it shut behind me.

Turning around, the other three couples had already left, so it just left Landon and me. Oh, and if you're wondering, we weren't going as a couple because like I said, I was not, under any circumstances, looking for anything more. He just looked kind of mesmerized though.

"Landon?" No reaction. "Landon, you're staring," I repeated, louder than the first time.

A blush crept up on his cheeks. "My bad…"

"Taken into account." I looked him up and down and noticed that he had a jail convict look going on. "Let's go."

"Alright," he responded, linking his arm with mine.

We made it to the huge party and found that they already had the music a full volume. I grinned and yanked him towards the other six.

"Told you it would all work out," Alicia cooed once we got over there.

"You said nothing about anything working out," I answered.

"Fine… But I was thinking it." And with that she flounced deep into the sea of dancers with Chris.

Olivia just shrugged and took off into the crowd with an idiotically grinning Josh Hotz. That left pirate-me with the black-clad convict, Kristen the female boxer (also a very short outfit) and Derrick the… I didn't actually know what he was supposed to be. It looked kind of like a cross between a wannabe-gangster and a male hip-hop singer. She led the two of them away, ready to invade the dance floor with everyone else.

Leaning back against the table, I glanced over at Landon who was looking at me again. He quickly looked away, trying to avoid awkward conversations. "Come on," I demanded lightly, grabbing his arm and pulling him out onto the dance floor.

Some of the songs weren't the most updated, but I didn't mind because they were all good. "So, I take it you've taken control tonight?"

"Yep." He chuckled at my immediate response.

The music was practically coursing through my body it was so loud, and I was loving every minute of it. I think Landon could tell because he just had this one look on his face that seemed to explain so much yet so little. Several of my favorite songs came on, and after a few not only was I way into it, but I'd gotten him into it too. I smiled and his matched mine. I got little flutters in my stomach again, but ignored them until they got stronger.

I was a bit angry at myself because I was getting closer to what I vowed to not even think about. The signs were all there, and it had me scared. Fear would rise silently in the depths of my brain because I couldn't stop it at all. Did I just give in to it, or did I try even harder to get away from it? I didn't believe in love, but could I even try any harder? I'd done my best, or so I thought. Evidently, I was giving in a lot earlier without any notice on my part.

A slow song came on and I bit my lip. "Uh…"

"Can't hurt us not, can it?" Landon shrugged.

I giggled. "Guess not, but you know my views on things, so watch it," I teased, putting my arms up around his neck. He put his hands on my waist and we swayed in time to the music.

"I've been trying to watch it," he admitted.

"I can only hope you'll rely on the fact that there is a reason for everything."

"I guess I'll just have to…"

I couldn't help but notice that we were closer than when the song had started. And although every fiber in my trained mind told me it was bad, my heart was liking it a bit too much. But then again, I expected it. At one point, Alicia had flat out told me that the first time she'd seen Landon and me together, she expected us to eventually turn out as a couple. We weren't on that Halloween night, but she was only giving it until New Years.

Was she right? I had two months before I would find out. Maybe even less than that.

**-:-**

**Yes, I am very big on skipping over time. I should let you know in advance that after a chapter or two more I will be doing another skip in the timeline.**

**Anyhow, I should stop rambling.**

**Love,**

**SDOW **


	5. Chapter5: Dance the Night Away

**University of Iowa  
>Campus Ballroom<br>Monday, October 31  
>8:35p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I smiled when I noticed how undeniably close we were dancing while the slow song played. Another wash of an indescribable feeling washed over me, planting a very tiny seed of confusion in the back of my mind.

Massie had looked hesitant, unsure when we'd first started to dance like that. We were supposed to be just friends. Best friends, yes, but I didn't know many sets of boy and girls best friends that felt like that, did stuff like that. Sure, there were a few, but what the heck was I supposed to do? I couldn't just sit back… Well, at that point I kind of had to. I knew that there was definitely something different about her though, I'd never in my life felt this way so it had to be something. But it couldn't be _that… _could it?

The music started to speed up again, and I reluctantly switched it back to our original form of dancing. A sense of disappointment flashed across my mind for a moment when I'd let go. Because of the bright flashing lights, I couldn't read Massie's expression very well. She seemed to at least be enjoying the party.

"Did you just jump in those heels?" I asked incredulously at one point.

"It fits with the song, duh." Massie made it sound obvious.

"You're dressed as a pirate with incredibly high-heeled shoes on and you only care that jumping fits with the song?"

"Pretty much. I'm going to go get something to drink," she announced, her bubbly personality shining through as she flounced off.

I just stood there, shaking my head. I was starting to think that I was wrong; different didn't even begin to describe her.

"Hey, where'd Massiekur go?" Alicia asked, walking up to me.

"Apparently to get something to drink," I shrugged.

"Ha, I doubt it. Knowing her, she probably figured out the intervals of how many slow and how many fast songs play because another slow one is about to come on in… Three. Two. One. Well, bye," Alicia walked away just as a slow song started to play.

"Oh, wow…" I sighed and headed over to one of the table where we had our stuff. Sitting down, I began to drum my fingers in time with the music, not sure what else to do.

"What are you doing over here all alone?" a female voice purred. I glanced up and sighed, what did Claire Lyons want that time?

"Waiting for my friend to come back," I answered simply, still tapping my fingers.

"Well, if it's just a friend I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you got up and danced with me." Claire tossed her hair and smiled. Who did she think she was anyway?

"No, but I do," I muttered.

"What was that?" she asked, tilting her head.

"Nothing."

"Come on, the song is going to end soon."

"Is there a problem here?" Massie asked innocently, walking up to the table with a drink in each hand.

I pulled her down into my lap. "Nope, Claire was just leaving."

Claire glared at Massie before huffing and going back to the dance floor. Massie shot up out of my lap. "What was _that_?" she snapped.

"Nothing…"

"Nothing would be if nobody was here and it was a blank empty wall and there was absolutely nothing. That was not nothing."

"Well, it worked didn't it? I was just getting her to go away," I shrugged. No big deal, right? Wrong.

"Oh God… this ought to be interesting."

"What are you talking about?"

She rolled her eyes and smirked. "Oh, you'll see. Come on, might as well dance again. It's already too late to stop it."

I shrugged again and we headed out onto the dance floor once more. The songs sped up, slowed down, made medium rounds even. Eventually though, Alicia, Kristen, Olivia, Derrick, Josh, Chris, Massie, and I were all ready to leave.

After filing out into the cold night, all of our faces sporting smiles and grins, Massie spoke up. "I say we head to the biggest dorm and watch horror films for the rest of the night."

Different responses rang out.

"I'm game."

"Why not?"

"Sounds fun."

"We have to watch the newest ones…"

"At least one classic."

"How about we just go?"

I chuckled slightly at the last outburst and we all went into our dorms to change. The largest dorm was actually Alicia's and Massie's, go figure.

Derrick and I headed inside the dorm and I peeled off the costume.

"Any idea why a certain blonde was a bit steamed off at the party," Derrick asked, smirking.

"None."

"Uh huh, we'll see about that."

I shook my head and switched into a pair of plaid pajama bottoms and a black T-shirt. Slipping on my shoes and college pull-over, I started out of the dorm with him trailing along behind me.

The air was cool, cloudy, and ironically a full moon was high and bright in the sky. "Happy Halloween!" Derrick called out and started beaming with jellybeans.

"Shouldn't you save those?" I inquired, taking a few of them and smacking him square in the face with my thankfully good aim.

"Yeah, probably. Oh, here's yours." He tossed me a bag of jellybeans and grinned. I slipped them into my pocket and knocked on the door.

Kristen opened the door and rolled her eyes when she saw us. "Figures, you two would take the longest."

"I'm not against throwing you over my shoulder," Derrick warned her, going inside.

I followed him in to find out that everybody was already situated into the abnormally large dorm. Kristen and Derrick had taken over the couch thing in one corner; Alicia and Chris were on Alicia's bed; Olivia and Josh were on an assortment of blankets and pillows; Massie was alone. I sat down beside her on the bed and settled in for the horror movie marathon.

A few of the movies were just retarded. Some of them came off more as a thriller than horror. One of the ones Massie seemed to really enjoy was called _The Roommate_. I was more adept to _Priest_, although it was a little strange.

There was a slight problem though. The later it got, the more everyone was getting tired. One by one, all of us were falling asleep. Massie nodded off and I didn't notice until her head hit my shoulder. I smiled to myself, it wasn't so bad.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Tuesday, November 1  
>10:20a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I woke up in my dorm with an odd sensation of being beside someone. Turning my head, I realized that I was in fact beside someone: Landon Crane. I also realize that he was a lot closer to me than necessary. Out of shock and because I'd had a lot of Red bull the night before, I literally fell off the bed.

"Are you okay?" Alicia giggled, looking over at me from her side of the room. Everybody had ended up staying the night and was just spread out in various parts of the room.

"Uh… peachy." I stood up and ran my fingers through my hair to air it out. "How long have you been awake?"

She paused, thinking. "Probably about five minutes. But I'm going back to sleep so go cuddle back up to him," she said dismissively with a Cheshire cat grin.

"We were just lying beside each other," I hissed, defending myself.

"Not five minutes ago…"

"Lovely, just lovely." I sighed and yanked on my Uggs, grabbing my car keys.

A half-an-hour later, I walked back into the door with Starbucks mocha in hand. Quietly, I plopped down onto my computer chair and started typing all the writing in from my latest writing assignment.

"So, that's where you went," a deep voice proclaimed. I turned around to find Landon with his head propped up with one hand.

"Yep." I felt awkward.

I turned back around and started typing some more, taking a drink of my white chocolate flavored mocha to try and calm my own nerves.

"Look, I'm sorry," he replied.

"About what?" My fingers were still flying across the keyboard as I switched between looking at my notebook and looking at the screen.

"The lion incident for starters, and then I'm sure you aren't too happy about this morning…" His voice trailed off and he looked down. I did like his choice of lion incident, referring to Claire Lyons.

"Don't worry about it. It was late; we were tired, no big deal." _Big deal… BIG DEAL! _My thoughts screamed. I ignored it though, just merely shrugging, because I knew that it could have been worse, a lot worse.

I kept typing up my latest assignment. Apparently, we needed to learn to write scripts for plays and such as well. Silence settled down and I didn't know whether to despise it or cherish it. The weather that day had taken a turn for the worse, dumping more and more rain.

"So, excited for the big car trip?" he asked nonchalantly, making small talk.

"Very," I mused, turning around and flashing a smile before turning back to my work.

"Same here."

Stark unharnessed silence followed. After what I assume was around thirty minutes, I turned to figure out that everyone was really starting to wake up.

"Morning," Kristen yawned.

"Afternoon," I responded, glancing at my iPhone.

"Well, that was an interesting night," Josh advertised while sitting up.

"Why are you over there?" Olivia asked.

"I'm working." I took another sip of my coffee and started reading it.

"Or?"

"Or nothing, she's been like this for forty-five minutes," Landon commented, sitting up.

Once everyone had gotten up, it was a very slow process, but they began to leave. Olivia and Kristen left pretty quickly considering their dorms were right down the halls.

They all filed out with their tired, mumbling goodbyes, leaving Alicia and me alone once again. She looked up at me, a mildly victorious smirk enveloping her Spanish features.

"Not one word," I commanded, turning and walking into the bathroom, closing the door lightly behind me.

I took a shower, washing any memory out of my hair with silk-infused, citrus shampoo and conditioner. The water was hot enough to fog up the mirrors, make the room a lot warmer than usual. Forty minutes later, I was out of the shower, changing into a pair of black Juicy cigarette pants and a periwinkle tank-top.

"Took you long enough," Alicia scoffed, smirking again.

"Why are you so happy?" I asked, looking out the window and for once in my life, wishing the rain would go away.

"I gave you until New Years and you're early."

"I'm not early on anything. Can't you just let fate or whatever handle this?"

"I don't know about you, but I think _fate's_ already sealed this envelope."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, I'm going to go get some yogurt from the dining hall. We ran out. Do you want anything?"

"Nah, I'll get something later."

With a shrug, I slipped on my Ella Moss blazer and grey flats, pushing outside the door with my Coach tote. My hair was still damp; I had yet to style it, so I just sprinted through the rain and into the cafeteria-type room. Not many people were there, mostly just the ones who slept-in a little too much like I.

I paid for one of the yogurts and sat down at one of the round tables in a corner with my tote. With a spoonful of the vanilla goop in my mouth, I stared thoughtfully out the window.

_Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. _The rain danced across the windows, pouring content from the sky like a half-hearted waterfall. Clouds, mostly charcoal and grey, coated the sky in a layered array. I had no idea what happened to my mood, but it had fallen a bit.

Absentmindedly, I swirled the spoon in my yogurt and thought about everything.

_Friends, best friends, that's all. Or is it more? Is it really ever more, or is more what it has always been and it's just not seen? Stop thinking about him. Then again, you know you can't. It'll never work; he's been glued in your mind for the past two months. It's not normal glue either; it's like a mixture of Gorilla Glue and superglue. Aren't these thoughts supposed to go away? You know you can't get into anything… _My thoughts were clearly centered.

I took another bite of the yogurt and picked up my iPhone, surprised to see a text message from my aunt.

**Layne: Are you still coming on the nineteenth? Big, big show that I'd just love to take you to.**

**Massie: I'll be there, wouldn't miss it.**

**Layne: Alright, remember to bring a friend. Love you, doll.**

**Massie: Love you too Aunt L.**

Layne Abeley was my aunt who was highly considered in the fashion world. Her very job was to organize the shows and outfits and such. Ever since I was a little girl, I loved visiting her and seeing the shows. It had become more of a yearly tradition than a regular outing with an aunt.

I finished off my yogurt, and stepped outside the dining hall. Under the awning, it was dry, but my hair had dried by that point and I didn't want to get it wet again. I glanced at my tote and back at the rain. With a sad stare and silent apology, I covered my head with my Coach and sprinted through the rain and back to the dorm. **  
><strong>I shoved through the thick door and set my Coach down by the door. Alicia giggled and I rolled my eyes again before ducking into the bathroom and putting up a messy bun. As I was walking back out, I slipped off my blazer and laid it neatly on my computer chair.

"A tad bit wet out there?" Alicia smirked at my damp Coach.

"No, really I hadn't noticed," I retorted, grabbing a bottle of silver nail polish out of my desk drawer.

"Shouldn't you just go get a mani/pedi before the trip?"

"Probably…" I shrugged and kicked off my flats.

"So, rumor has it that you're driving with a certain someone to Westchester."

"That's nice, we'll be in separate cars, and he is the only one who was leaving the same day as me," I confirmed.

"Ha, I might just have to bump up my timeline guess," she boasted with a grin.

"You do whatever you need to do," I sighed.

**-:-**

**Next Chapter we are skipping ahead and starting the car trip. Adios!**

**SDOW**


	6. Chapter6: Roadtrips and Silent Dreams

**University of Iowa  
>Parking Lot<br>Friday, November 18  
>8:00a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I shoved my suitcase into the trunk with my toiletries bag and a few extra pairs of shoes. With a light slam, I closed the trunk and went over to Landon.

"You ready?" I asked, leaning against the side of his truck.

"Ready as I'll ever be," he joked, grinning. There was that single dimple again…

"Alright then, I'm just going to hook up my radar detector and we can go. You can head out now if you want."

"Wait, your radar detector?"

"Yeah, don't you have one?"

"Um, I don't even know what it is…"

"Oh, okay then." I shrugged and went back over to my car, Landon following me curiously.

I plugged the cord into the car and stuck the little detector on my dash. To finish it off, I plugged in the tape thing and hooked up my iPod to the car's stereo system.

"What does it do?" he inquired, looking at the detector again.

"Not much, just beeps when it picks up police radar or whatever that is." I climbed down into the car. "Drive safe."

"Be careful," he responded, marching away and hopping up into his truck.

I closed my door and turned the key in the ignition, powering up my Charger. Just as a reminder, I stuck my Bluetooth into my ear (phone call purposes) and cranked up the stereo to my liking. With naturally acquired driving skills, I backed up and sped out of the parking lot, driving for a little bit before merging onto I-80 E towards Chicago.

With a quick look in my rearview mirror, I could see that Landon was following me in his 2011 Toyota Tundra. With a quick flick on my steering wheel, the song was switched to _Animal _by Ke$ha. I smiled at the song and sped up to match the speed limit of the road.

One hour down, about eighteen more to go.

It felt strange, being in the car for so long alone. The longest I'd ever been alone in a car was about four hours. Oh well, there was a first time for everything.

After another hour, I was far enough out that I just switched on my cruise control and kept driving. Driving. Endless hours of driving. Calls, "How far?". More Driving. Just keep going.

For some reason, the little swimming rhyme from _Finding Nemo _popped into my head and I laughed at myself, just as Landon was passing me. He looked at me from the side and chuckled to himself. It was strange, driving in the little short car right beside the tall Tundra.

Passing through all the towns, after a while we were long past Chicago, very far out of Iowa. Away from the college for at least a week, maybe more, was our plan.

At one point my iPhone buzzed. Turning down the music, I pressed the button on my Bluetooth.

"Massie speaking."

"_Rest stop, two miles up on the next exit. You game?" Landon's rich voice filled the line._

"Am I game? That's one way to put it, but sure. It has been three hours…"

"_Alright, see you then." _

The line clicked off and I took the exit first, curving into a side parking spot, Landon following suit and parking behind me. I got out and locked the car, heading in the direction of the bathrooms.

It was a fairly neat stop, kind of out of the way, but fairly well kept. I went to the bathroom, washed my hands, and splashed the cold water on my face, lightly dabbing it off with a tissue from my purse before adding extra moisturizer and touching up my makeup.

When I got back out, Landon paid for two cups of coffee and just stood, half-leaning, against the side of his truck.

"Merry Christmas," he greeted, handing me one of the cups.

"Thanks," I snickered. At the same time, we raised the cups to our lips, took a sip, and then spat it right back out. My first instinct was to take the cup and dump it on the ground.

"Uh, I think they used toilet water to make the coffee," I said, taking the liquid and pouring it on the grass before throwing the cup in a nearby can.

"Or worse," he agreed, mimicking my actions. He studied me for a moment. "You were changing your makeup in the bathroom weren't you?"

"No…"

"I'll take that as a yes."

"Then you took it the right way." I rolled my eyes teasingly and sat down on a nearby bench. My phone buzzed again.

**Alicia: Having fun?**

**Massie: Never drinking rest stop coffee again. But other than that, all is well.**

**Alicia: I learned that a lesson a long time ago. Be safe.**

**Massie: Will try.**

I tilted my head backwards and stared up at the clouds before standing up again.

"Ready to head out again?" he asked, gesturing at our cars. I looked at mine fondly.

"Let's go." We hopped into our respective cars and took off again.

My music was on again, the radar beeping every once in a while. Three more hours passed. It was quiet, but I was alert. By hour seven, I was on my second Red bull, drinking it without completely bouncing around my car.

The time passed. My iPod music was pretty much pounded, and then pounded over once more into my memory. At one point I was able to recite the old Rihanna song _Take a Bow_. This gained me another strange look from him when I was singing along rather loudly with the song. I froze my mouth, grinned, waved, and then sped up a little, moving past him.

My phone buzzed once more.

**Landon: I saw that. Kind of glad I couldn't hear it…**

**Massie: Keep your eyes on the road.**

**Landon: Voice texting. Heard of a microphone?**

I glared at him when he reached my speed and watched as he beamed before turning back to the road.

Another hour passed, and I finished my Red bull. By then, the aftereffects of the previous one were starting to settle, but battling with the renewed effects of the first one. There was about one more hour left of driving before we would make it to the Holiday Inn for the first night. Of course, I'd never stayed in Richfield, Ohio, but that was another first. I could always have chosen the Hampton Inn that was a little more in the middle of the trip, but I figured that the Holiday would be better anyway.

"Over halfway, Westchester, I will see you tomorrow," I said aloud to myself.

Another hour and a half later, we were pulling into the parking lot, and checking into the hotel. I had one overnight backpack slung over my shoulder and my toiletries bag.

In the elevator, we were mostly quiet. At that point, it was about 6:45 and the stretch on my legs felt good. I was surprised at how calm it really was.

"Alright, here are the rooms. There is a door in the middle, but technically that is yours," I gestured to one, "and this is mine." I handed him a room key and turned. "Knock on the adjoining door if you need something."

Once in my own room, I washed up my face again and redid my ponytail so that it was higher up and less frazzled. Outside the window, it was already beginning to darken, but you could still see the cheery mixture of red and yellow; orange and brown; gold and crimson. Fall was certainly a marvelous time of year, although it wasn't my favorite.

A slight knock pushed me away from my thoughts. Standing back up straight, I went over and opened the door. "Ready to go eat?" Landon asked.

"You are such a guy," I commented, shaking my head.

"Well, I would hope so. That's what my birth certificate and my body both say."

"Rumor has it that you got pregnant though."

"You are mature."

"Nope, but thanks anyway." I walked out of the room and closed my door. He met me from the other door and gave me one of "the looks".

Together, we made our way down to the hotel's restaurant and drank water after the waiter took our orders.

"So, is the driving fun?" I'd been deep in thought and bounced back a little.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, but I think the Red bull is catching up to me…"

"I just hope I don't have to carry you back up to your room," he chuckled, twirling the straw in his drink.

"Hold on, I got to take this," I said when my phone started buzzing. Landon just nodded.

"Massie Block here."

"_Massie, you're never going to believe this, but you probably should've been a little more careful if you didn't want it to happen," Kristen rambled._

"Please, just get to the point," I giggled.

"_People are starting to ask about you and Landon and Claire has practically been shooting daggers at our whole group. Oh, what fun we have." She snickered on the other line._

"You can thank him for that…"

"_Yeah, at one point, some girl came up and started asking questions and Alicia, oh how we love Alicia, escorted her away from the table. You should have been there."_

"Well, you'll see me in a few days and can finish then. But now, I got to go. Love ya' like a sister," I replied.

"_Love ya' too!" _

I hung up and smirked at Landon.

"Am I missing something?" he implored.

"I told you." Simple and understated, but downright confusing to him.

"You told me what?"

"A lot of things, but mainly that people would talk after your little lap stunt."

He grinned. "And you care what others think since when."

"I don't, but I did tell you. Gossip, rumors, lies, it all travels fast. It'll be all nice and fun and out of control within the next month. Just you wait," I snickered, somewhat evilly.

The waiter came by and set down our plates before moving off again. I took a sip of water and twisted my fork between my fingers, the smirk turning into a smile.

We ate, talked, laughed, and almost choked at least once from doing it all at the same time. By the time I was back up to the room, it was just past eight, but I was already tired.

"Night," Landon said, pulling me in for a quick hug before I could inevitably protest. He pulled back and sauntered into his own room.

I shook my head and changed into boy shorts and a tank top. The adjoining door was just left propped open.

Clicking off the light, I crawled into my bed and stared at the ceiling. One little worry about being back in Westchester was gnawing at my mind, but I ignored it. Little did I know; that worry would become a reality. My eyes fluttered to a closed point and I was asleep.

**-(0)-**

**2:05a.m.**

I sat up with a start and shook my bangs from my eyes. Sleep was never dreamless. Whether you could see it or not, hear it or not, the dreams were always there. At the time, the startling, shocking effects from a nightmarish dream were taking place in my mind.

My heart rate was slightly up when I got out of the bed and stumbled into the bathroom, splashing ice cold water onto my sleep-ridden face. My amber irises flitted around the room, inspecting everything. I leaned on my palms over the counter and stared down at it, recollecting myself.

"You alright?" Landon's tired voice mumbled. I looked up in the mirror to find that he was behind me. My spine tingled at the sight of his partially closed teal eyes half-blinded by the light, bedhead, and shirtless torso.

"Sorry, did I wake you up?" I responded, edging away from his earlier question.

"Nah, I woke up on my own but heard you in here and I know you aren't much of a middle of the night person." He pulled one hand through his hair.

"Oh." I looked back down at the counter.

"Something bothering you?"

"No, I'm… fine. Just one of those silent, imageless, yet utterly disturbing dreams is all," I sighed.

"Seems like it got you pretty pent up," he noted whilst looking me over again.

"A little…" I shrugged and turned off the bathroom light, trailing out by the bed again. He followed and sat down on the edge of my bed, which I didn't exactly notice.

I crawled back in the bed and lied down on one side, facing the window. It wasn't working out, so I turned back around and nearly fell out of the bed just like the day after Halloween. "Uh, hi."

"Hey," Landon responded, lounging on one elbow and looking at me.

"Shouldn't you be…" I waved one hand towards the door.

"I'm just making sure that you're okay," he contributed. I involuntarily smiled. He easily matched it with his own.

I nodded silently and relaxed farther into the pillows. I also wondered to myself why he was the only guy I'd ever done something like that with. Oh, yeah, this wasn't ordinary and I certainly wasn't being careful.

Eventually, and gratefully, I nodded off again, but this time I went to sleep with my gaze locked with someone else's.

**-:-**

**Holiday Inn  
>Room 234<br>Saturday, November 19  
>9:30a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I lounged back against my bed, making no move to leave until another half-hour passed. There wasn't any need; we only had about six hours left of the drive.

The weather that day was mostly sunny and I smiled, glad that it would probably be a good day. I just stared out the window thinking for a while.

A while later, I patted down the room one last time, grabbed my things and waited in the hallway. Landon came out and we went downstairs, checked out, and hit the road again.

Music blasted; sunroof open, it really was that good; sunglass on; body tingling in anticipation; it was wonderful. I relied on one large cup of coffee to keep me going.

Seven hours later, we passed the large "Welcome to Westchester, NY!" sign and I smiled.

I dialed and waited.

"_Hello?"_

"Here's where we part ways. Call me later?"

"_Will do, it's good to be here."_

"I know… Well, I will talk to you later."

"_Alright, bye for now."_

And the phone clicked silent once again. We were finally there, back in Westchester. I embraced the autumn day and sped up to the Block Estate.

Maneuvering my car up the long driveway, I was happy to see that my mom was already there waiting for me.

"Massie!" she exclaimed, jogging forwards and giving me a huge motherly hug.

"Hey, Kendra," I greeted, smiling.

"Ah, Massie, there you are," William mused with a smile, striding from the house and out to meet me.

"Hey, William," I answered.

"Well, come inside," he urged, grabbing my suitcase from the trunk. I grabbed my other two bags and followed him up to my old room. Those old glow-in-the-dark stars were stuck on the ceiling above my bed; the room still mostly decorated in blues, purples, white and some spots of red.

"Inez is cooking, but we'll just let you get settled in here," Kendra replied.

They left the room and I turned, looking around.

"It's good to be back," I whispered to myself.

**-:-**

**Ha, I've been waiting for these chapters. One of my main parts is coming up soon. They are here though, so go Westchester I guess!**

**Smile!**

**SDOW**


	7. Chapter7: London Bridge is Falling Down

**For something in this chapter, remember that Landon knows nothing of Massie's previous relationships.  
>-:-<strong>

**Crane Household  
>Landon's Old Room<br>Saturday, November 19  
>7:30p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I pulled up the driveway and parked in front of the garage door. Celia rushed out the door and strode across the steps and path over to me in her heels.

"Landon, finally you made it!" she gushed, giving me a hug. That's what moms are for I suppose.

"Yep, it's good to be back. How are you, Celia?"

"Oh, same as always. Come on in, your old room's been cleaned and spiffed."

_Spiffed_, was she serious? "Alright," I agreed, grabbing my suitcase and backpack before parading after her into the house.

My old room was the same as it had been when I'd left three months ago; blue walls, a few posters, monochrome horizontal-striped duvet.

A few minutes later, there was a light walk and Celia walked in again.

"Do you know anybody by the name of Massie?" she asked curiously.

My eyes widened; where had she heard that name? "Uh, yeah."

"Good, then you're already acquainted."

"What does she have to do with anything?" I inquired, digging around for my trainers.

"Oh, just wondering. You see, we met at the mall one day and became friends. We were just talking about the two of you the other day."

My mother and Massie's mother were friends? Could it get any stranger? Oh, yeah, it already had. They talked about us…

"That's, um, nice. I hate to be rude, but I need to stretch my legs. I'm going to go for a run, be back later." I pulled off my original shoes and, once she left the room, switched into basketball shorts and my trainers.

The air outside was mildly cool, but warmer than Iowa. A few clouds slowly moved around the sky. My feet pounded against the sidewalk as I made my way down the familiar street, passing all the old houses and my hometown neighborhood. Three months at college and I was already having a little trouble adjusting again.

I just kept moving, past the neighborhood, past ADD, past BOCD, heading towards the Westchester Park. The trees were already changed and leaves were spinning downwards, making their rounds until every single leaf fell and was raked or blown away.

At one point, I sat down next to some random guy on a bench and pulled one leg up to retie my shoe.

"Hey," he said calmly, leaning back with his hands in his pockets.

"Hey," I responded, finally getting the knot undone.

"Another Westchester runner I see."

"Nah, I'm a native, but I'm just here for the holiday," I shrugged.

"Oh, well, I'm Cam, Cam Fisher," Cam said with some air of slight arrogance about him.

I hesitated. "Landon Crane. You go to school here?"

"Sort of. I go to NYU. And you?"

"University of Iowa," I declared.

"As in Iowa City?" Shock rang in his voice.

"Yep."

"Do you know Massie Block?" he asked eagerly. What was with people and asking about her that day?

"She's a friend, why?"

"Is she here?"

"Why do you care?"

"We're old… friends," he commented, choosing his words closely. I didn't know why, but something about him really bothered me.

"Well, yeah I think she's at her house or whatever," I shrugged, pretending not to care, although I was absurdly curious where she was at the moment myself.

"Good, I got to go see her. Thanks, man," he grinned genuinely and took off.

I just shrugged and fixed my other trainer before jogging back to my own house.

**-(0)-**

"Landon, dinner is ready," Celia called.

"Alright," I mumbled, getting up and walking into the dining room.

We sat down and ate for a few minutes in silence.

"So, how is college?" she implored, taking another bite.

"Pretty fun, we've been doing a lot of miniature films and stuff like that," I responded.

"Sounds like fun. It's been pretty quiet around here without you and your rowdy friends," she sighed.

"I think you'd be overwhelmed if you noticed that the rowdy levels have gone down slightly."

"Really?" Surprise! Not…

"Really. After homework we don't really mess around as much. A lot of movies and messing around on the campus, stuff like that is more normal I suppose. What have you been up to?"

"I got a few new store items in. I took up sewing, even go to classes now." She twisted her fork and though quietly. "Besides that, I'm curious about something."

"Mmm, and what's that?"

"Well, have you met a girl or something?"

"What kind of question is that?" Avoid the question, best route.

"I don't know, you just seem… different I guess. And I'm your mother, I deserve to know these things."

"Well, yeah, I met somebody, but we're just friends so…"

"So, do something about it." My mother smirked at me.

"You sound like Derrick. It isn't that easy," I sighed, taking a drink of the ice water.

"It isn't for you. Why don't you go call her?" she suggested, clearing away the dishes.

"Okay…" I scooped my Droid off the table and went up to my room. I sat down on the bed and dialed.

_Ring… Ring… Ring… Ring… Ring… Ring… Ring… _It went to voicemail. I persisted and tried again only for the same result to prevail.

It was strange. Massie never missed a phone call, especially not twice in a row. I sent a text, just to keep it up.

**Landon: Hey, just wondering how you're doing. Called, no answer. Text me later…**

Twenty minutes later and there was still no reply. Another worry pulled to the surface. She never took more than five minutes to answer a text, ever. Massie was a light sleeper and nearly everything woke her up, so it wasn't that either.

Just to be safe, I sent a different text, this time to Alicia.

**Landon: Have you heard from Massie?**

**Alicia: No, and I called a few times too. It's worrying me. Haven't you heard from her?**

**Landon: Nope, that's why I texted you.**

**Alicia: I'm worried… Give me like ten minutes, I'll call her house phone.**

I looked up at the ceiling, still silently wondering what was going on. Massie wasn't answering anyone at all. Knowing her, this time of night was usually when she would write down her little daydreams and stuff that she found interesting.

Another fifteen minutes passed by.

**Alicia: Her mom said that she got a strange visitor and has been mostly silent since then… Locked in her room. Will you go check on her?**

**Landon: Yeah. I'll text you later to let you know what's happening.**

**Alicia: Okay… Thank you, Landon.**

I said that I had to go somewhere, went outside, got in my trucked, and pinned her address into my phone's GPS. Soon, I was on my way to the infamous Block Estate.

When I got there, I saw why it was so known. The place was huge and had the flowers lining the front side; a large, winding driveway led up to the three-car garage. The edge of a pool was visible from the front of the house and a guesthouse stood in the far right corner. Talk about loaded…

Slipping down from the truck, I locked the doors and went up to the front door, knocking loudly.

"Hello?" a petite Hispanic woman opened the door and spoke.

"Is Massie here?" I asked, switching from one foot to the other.

"Who are you?" she snapped, looking me up and down.

"Landon…"

"So you're not Cameron Fisher?" she growled.

"Nope."

"Alright… she is up in her room. Go up the staircase, third door on the right."

I nodded. "Thank you."

Bounding up the staircase, I made it up there and knocked on Massie's bedroom door. When she didn't answer, I tried the knob and was mildly surprised when it opened right up.

Massie looked up when I walked in. A few seconds later, a single tear rolled down her cheek.

**-:-**

**(Quick A/N: First time ever, I'm going backwards so you could see what was happening for Massie while Landon's POV was being told…)**

**Block Estate  
>Foyer<br>Saturday, November 19  
>8:05p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I was sitting on a chair in the foyer for no direct reason, just enjoying being at my old estate. My lucky purple pen and favorite notebook lay in my lap while I thought extensively about nothing and everything.

A sharp rap came on the door. Before Inez could shuffle up, I called out, "I'll get it!"

When I opened the door, my eyes nearly popped out when I saw Cam standing there. "Massie," he breathed, pulling me in for a hug. I pushed him away.

"What do you want?" I sneered, taking a quick look at my purse that my sitting on the table by the chair I'd been using.

"I want to talk to you," he answered brightly.

"There is nothing to talk about." My voice was more like a flat, barren desert then a sound.

"Yeah, there is. I want to say that I'm so sorry for everything. I screwed up so badly, I can't even forgive myself. Please, don't just walk away Massie. I want, I need another chance."

"No, you don't need another anything. I am well aware that you screwed up. And Dylan too, she was just as bad. Who would've thought that dumb, old Massie would catch her best friend and her boyfriend?" Flat, barren, and now cold.

"It wasn't like that. It just happened and I feel horrible about it."

"You should. I left for college and moved on, you should too."

"Wait, you have a boyfriend?" he asked incredulously.

"No, but I do have one best friend who could easily become more than that," I said thoughtfully, thinking of Landon.

"Please, Massie, just give me one more chance."

"Go away Cameron…"

"Please."

"Cam, I told you to leave."

"Massie, you don't understand…"

I reached and pulled the bottle of glitter Josh had gotten me out of my purse. Didn't he get it yet? "No, I think _you _don't understand, Cameron. I want you out of my life."

He reached for my hand, but in downright frustration, I uncapped the glitter and dumped it on his head. Cam shook his head, failing to get it out, but rather mixing it in. "What was that?" he gaped.

"Ready to go now?" I smiled a very fake smile.

"I guess…" he was still shell-shocked. God, hadn't he ever seen glitter before?

I closed the door on him and turned against, going from the sarcastic get-out-of-my-way person to the emotionless, figure who felt empty. My whole inside, all the pain I thought was there was bubbling at the surface, but I was only empty for the time being.

All the strength and the brave front I'd ever put up was wasting away fast. I'd been too strong, I'd kept it bottled up and it was preparing to explode.

"Massie, are you okay? I just saw a very sparkly and confused looking boy walk away…" Kendra walked over.

"I need to be alone," I stated before turning and walking slowly up the stairs, and down the hallway.

I got into my bedroom, closed the door (forgetting to lock it), and sat down on my bed. My knees were pulled up to my chest and I knew that within a few hours, I wouldn't be able to hide it anymore.

Every single ounce of the hurt Cam had caused, every disappointment in my life, all the bad memories, the time I'd gotten whacked in the back of the head and had a concussion (still an unsolved case, by the way), all of it was coming. Crawling up my throat as I stared at the unlit room, there were my emotions, ready to retaliate because I'd hid them from the world.

The only light was coming from a few streetlamps down the street, the low lighting seeping into my window where the curtains were still apart. That and my little stars on the ceiling provided barely any light, but a little bit. I sat right in the middle of the bed, my knees pulled and folded up against my chest in a tight, and one person hug. My arms were wrapped around my knees and I rested my chin on them.

You see, I was just waiting, waiting for it to blow. Silence and emptiness filled my whole being, an emotionless, shaped blob. I was dimly aware of the near constant buzzing of my iPhone in my pocket. _Ignore it all_… that little voice in my head urged. _If you're careful it might just pass. You'll be able to enjoy yourself again soon, just be careful. _

My iPhone kept buzzing. Out of numb irritated curiosity, I pulled it out and looked at the screen. Seven missed calls, five text messages, four emails, all bounded onto one screen were my notifications. I sighed and dropped it on the bed, ignoring it when it started to buzz again.

At one point, I almost thought I would explode just because I was so lifeless, but I didn't. Eventually, I heard a knock, two voices, bounding footsteps, a door opening nearby. I glanced up at my own and didn't feel any emotion when I saw Landon for a few seconds.

_Is he really there?_ That voice asked questions. And then the pain came, along with its friend darkness. Tears sprang to my eyes and before I could swallow the lump and hide my life again, a single wet droplet rammed out of my eye and took a winding path down my cheek.

"I'm so sorry…" I muttered, burying my face into my knees as the tears started to fall freely like my cheeks were some community waterslide.

Why was this happening? And then I realized it…

My wall was crumbling, and it was coming down hard.

**-:-**

**One of the chapters that I have been sincerely waiting to write has come. **

**I am like stoked about this chapter because it is one of the main turning points. Of course, I plan to make this story so that there is more than one turning point…**

**Anyway, please, especially now, let me know what you think. Please review and let me know!**

**Well, I'll spare you of further rambling…**

**Live like there's no tomorrow.  
>Laugh like you've never been able to before.<br>Love every change you get.  
>Triple L ^<strong>

**SDOW**


	8. Chapter8: Silent Sobs

**Block Estate  
>Massie's Old Room<br>Saturday, November 19  
>9:10p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"What in the…?" Landon's voice seemed incredibly far away.

The tears streamed silently onto my sweatpants, unable to stay hidden any longer. This was the darkness of my hidden emotions; all of the dark was spilling out.

"Massie?" his voice rang out again, maybe an inch closer this time. Who knows? I wouldn't look up; there wasn't a valid reason to care at the time.

My hair fell down around my knees, just helping the idea of hiding myself from outsiders. Well, he wasn't technically an outsider, but he still had no idea about any of it. Not even the slightest hint. Alicia knew, but not even I knew how built up it was.

The weight on the bed shifted and I was dimly aware of the presence of a hand gently rubbing my back. "What's going on?" Landon whispered.

"The wall, it's broken. It's crumbling, falling," I managed bitterly, almost silently, into my knees.

"What wall?"

"It's complicated…" I buried my face farther into my knees as the hot droplets rushed out of my eyes faster.

He was quiet for a while, still rubbing the small of my back. I couldn't think much out of the tears and the hurt and the problems, but something in the back of my mind was going off. It hit me after a strained moment of pushing through a different kind of barrier; this wasn't how my friendship was supposed to work with him. Before I could dwell more on that though, the curtain closed and the earlier factors were just taking over left and right.

"Lay down," he commanded softly.

I looked up through the stream of tears and noticed that he was giving me the most intense stare I'd ever seen in my life. It was kind of disturbing. Obeying, I let my knees down slightly and felt myself going backwards, my back landing on the duvet softly.

There was something different about me. A lot of times, you imagine somebody crying really hard and you just have an image of heart-wrenching sobs, but that was never how I was. My crying only consisted of a constant flood of hot water and the occasional sniffle. I'd met a few people who thought it was even sadder than the loud sobs.

"I'm sorry," I whimpered, my voice cracking as another crashing wave of tears flowed.

"It's not your fault," he responded, quiet as ever. Way to up on my pathetic-feeling factor, Landon.

"No, it really is…" He was still sitting up, watching me intently while I spoke the few simple words. I really felt like telling him to stop staring at me, but I opted for the silent mode. It was strange, being this vulnerable around the person who I knew the least and the most about. More tears…

He lied down beside me and pulled me up against his chest. If it was any other circumstances, I would have protested instantly, but I figured that if I'd already broken my biggest rule, why not just embrace it. Besides, I had a feeling that I would have no luck whatsoever if I even tried to escape, although I did feel like just running somewhere.

Another roll of muted sobs tore through my chest and the grip around me tightened ever so slightly. The wanting to escape was lessening, as were the tears. At least the tears would stop soon… hopefully.

"Shhh…." Landon urged, pulling a hand through the back part of my hair. It felt wrong in one part of me, but right in a different part.

Seconds passed, leading to minutes, leading to another half-hour. The flow was winding farther and farther down at this point. Slowly, the empty feeling started to fill up again and my first instinct was to shove back away from him. I was fully prepared to, but when I looked up and saw a look in his eyes that I really didn't want to see, I all but froze. My mind started shifting gear again, but I made not even one mental note to get the wall back up. It was done, it was gone. The annoying, disloyal mental wall was gone for good.

Eventually, the tears stopped altogether while I started to recollect myself. After a few moments I sighed guiltily.

"I really am sorry about that…" I muttered, my voice still releasing some of the thickness.

"I have a sneaking suspicion that you have a good reason," her responded, pulling back slightly and looking into my eyes.

"I suppose I should give an explanation, but if I'm not a total whack job in your mind yet, can I just wait a bit?" I pleaded, not really knowing what to say at the time.

"Yeah, I think I can handle that. But, if you're wondering, it's almost eleven."

"You should probably be getting back to your mom then," I answered quietly, frustrated with myself for not looking forward to the prospect.

"I don't think she's expecting much," he shrugged. "Besides, I figure this isn't the best night for you to be alone."

"Thank you… for everything."

"I'll always be here," Landon confessed.

I nodded and curled up further into his chest. Not an hour later, my eyelids grew heavy and I drifted off, desperate to keep the hurt from coming back.

**-(0)-**

**3:00a.m.**

**LC;**

I blinked a few times, grasping onto my thoughts. It really was confusing at first. Finally, I realized that I was in Massie's bedroom and that she was actually curled up in my arms. And I remembered everything at that instant. Massie, silent and long-time-coming tears, all of it was pouring into my mind. That ever-present, burning curiosity twisted in my mind, begging for an answer to my questions. But finally, after all the trouble, she was fast asleep and I was hoping to keep it that way. When she'd been crying, although completely noiseless, it was so… so heartbreaking. Something in me, I wasn't sure what, but something positively hated to see her in any amount of pain. It was the same instinct to make it go away that had shown itself when I'd found her on the sidewalk in September.

She shifted in position and pressed her head down on my collarbone, releasing one of those sleep-induced sighs. I had a feeling that she had no idea how hard she had been making it for the past two months for me to keep my hands, among other things, to myself. The first time I really noticed it was when she leaned into whisper something and I had to avert my own attention away to keep from leaning further in and kissing her. Yeah, I had it that bad. And the best part, she didn't notice it at all. Whether Massie didn't want to know how I really felt, or if it just wasn't even obvious at all, I didn't know… Then again, she could always just be ignoring it.

That night at the hotel, although I'd never tell her, she hadn't woken me up, but I was already awake; staring at the ceiling and thinking about her.

I wondered why I'd even woken up; it was so quiet that the noise level hadn't been a problem. And I certainly didn't mind the position I was in.

Gingerly, I switched my position and closed my eyes again. Between the low lighting, gentle breaths, and some sort of vanilla scent somewhere in the room, I fell asleep.

**-:-**

**Block Estate  
>Massie's Old Room<br>Sunday, November 20  
>9:35a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

With a subtle yawn, I took a minute to regain memory. It took a lot less time than I expected, but everything came back and ceased to leave me with many questions. Although I was wondering how I was expected to get up in the position I was in…

I wriggled free of Landon's arms and went into the bathroom, washing off my face and giving it a quick splash before taking a quick shower. Still in a towel, I blow-dried my hair and threw it into a messy bun. With a quick look out the window, my choice was made clear and I yanked on a pair of grey acid-washed skinny jeans and a black, long sleeved V-neck.

The weather that day reminded me of the current Iowa issue. Rain, buckets and buckets being poured down from the sky like we all wanted a community bath.

For a moment, I hesitated exiting the bathroom, still unsure about whether _he_ had woken up or not. I had a feeling that one awkward conversation was going to go down that day.

Quietly, I slipped out of the bathroom and sat down on my computer chair, turning away and slumping down to stay hidden. My iPhone buzzed, again and I finally picked up.

"Massie speaking," I answered quietly.

"_Way to worry us. Learn to answer your phone!" Alicia giggled. "Anyway, what happened?"_

"Look, there was just a, um, run-in and I really couldn't contact anyone. I have to say, I think that was my first ever breakdown in front of someone," I sighed, not going into detail.

"_Alright, so Landon did go. You two are terrible at keeping one posted." _

"Anyway, I don't want to wake anyone up, so call me when you get closer, alright?"

"_Uh, most adults are up this early in the morning," she noted, sarcasm ringing slightly in her tone._

"Yeah, they are, but not all college students are. Have a good drive."

"_What? Oh… oh! I got it, will do." _

She hung up the phone and I set my own lightly on the desk. It was true; I really didn't want to wake Landon up. Truth be told, I was embarrassed over what had happened and didn't know what to make of everything. Not to mention that one look he had in his eye at one point was still bothering me. Could it have been real, or was it something else?

"You do know that I'm awake, right?" Landon asked, suddenly appearing behind me. I looked upwards.

"Um, now I do," I responded.

"Ah, I see that." At that point, I had no idea what to expect, not even an inkling of one.

"Ah?"

"Yes, I said ah…" He shrugged his broad shoulders, blinking a few times to get the leftover sleep out of his eyes.

"So, did you sleep well?"

He grinned. "Mostly."

"That's good then." I smiled back, my head still tilted upwards.

"Uh, so, I'm not exactly sure how to approach this, but…" Landon hesitated, trying to figure out what to say.

"But you want to talk about what happened," I finished.

"Well, I guess that works too."

"Alright, but I'd rather not have to sit like this." With a soft sigh, I got up and led him over to the bed, sitting on one side and gesturing for him to take the other.

He sat down and looked at me, the look on his face saying everything.

"Did I ever tell you about my first love?" I asked. It was obviously a 'no', but oh well.

"Can't say you have."

"Well then, I guess he's the base of it all. His name was Cameron Fisher, but most just called him Cam."

"Wait Cam Fisher? I met him…" He looked ever so slightly astonished.

"I figured that much. Anyway, we dated for quite a while, just over a year. He was your typical sweetheart, or so he made himself out to be. But I had this one _best friend_ named Dylan. God, now I look back and wonder what was wrong with me…

"Now, keep in mind that we were juniors when this happened, but I guess she had a crush. And that crush bloomed. One day I found them having quite a heated… eh, session behind the gym." I sighed, not all that happy about bringing up the past. Although, I found that this time I could talk about it without tearing up or needing to just stop.

"Oh…" Landon had that stunned expression again.

"From that point on I vowed never to fall in 'love' again. Besides, even now I'm still debating if love is even real. Moving on, other things happened as well. My grandmother passed away three months later. My group switched and even though I knew them before, that's when I became main friends with the group I'm in now. Feel free to cut in at any time, by the way."

"I will remember that," he indicated. "Go on…"

I playfully rolled my eyes before continuing, "I saw the University of Iowa as more than just an amazing opportunity; I figured that I could just get it away from it all, not have to deal with Cam or Dylan. Well, I go there, and then I met you. And, err, well some stuff happened. Skipping those details, we move on to when I got mugged or whatever the hell that was. Really, I'd just kind of had a down day and that happens and it started adding to the pain I'd already had buried inside.

"The whole wall thing, by the way, would be that I promised myself that I would keep up a barrier to keep certain things out and all the hurt in. But last night Cam showed up, and I wasn't happy. That glitter Josh gave me, well; I dumped that on his head before he left. And then it hit me. I felt so empty, but I knew that it was on the verge of exploding and releasing all my secrets.

"So, I ignored texts, calls, emails, all that in an attempt to just keep myself quiet. But then you showed up and I don't know, I guess something just connected inside me and it all came out. I couldn't stop it. And I'm really, really sorry for that, on the record."

"That does explain a lot. But like I said before, it wasn't your fault, and I don't see why you're so worried about that. But I am still curious about one little thing…" he confessed.

"Oh?"

"Well, what details did you skip?" He raised his eyebrows and curiously watched my expressions.

A red stain seeped onto my cheeks and I looked downwards. "It's nothing…"

"If it's anything like mine than it's certainly something."

"You caught me, it most definitely is something, but it isn't the type of thing you tell one of your guy friends, specifically when it's about him," I confessed, biting my lower lip.

Landon sighed and pulled a hand through his hair. My heart started racing again and I wasn't angry about it for the first time. "I see, well then, someday, it will come out. I'm sure of that."

"Come on, might as well go get you fed now," I commented, hopping down off the bed and grabbing a spare bobby pin to put my bangs up.

With a shrug, he followed me out of the bedroom and down the staircase, travelling down a short hallway and into the kitchen where Inez was busying herself with the dishwasher.

"What in the…? He stayed here?" Inez gasped, her accent prodding gently at her words.

"Yes, he did," I confirmed, grabbing the orange juice out of the fridge.

"Massie Serene Block, you did not do that, did you?" the petite housemaid asked, her eyes popping with suspicion.

"Nothing like that, Inez, you can be assured of that," I snickered.

"If I ever find out that you did something like that in this house, I will not cease to…"

"Inez, I am a few months shy of twenty years old, I can take care of myself." I passed a bowl to Landon who was starting to look a bit deterred by the conversation.

"You need to know the truth of things."

"Are you asking me to give you something to complain about?" I implored mischievously.

"You wouldn't…"

I grinned and turned, leaning towards Landon. Inez glared at me before shuffling out of the room. I backed off and leaned back against the counter. There was just one problem; he wasn't taking his eyes off of me at all. It was almost as if he was going to pounce on me himself.

"What?" I asked, smiling.

"Oh nothing, nothing at all," he sighed.

**-:-**

**Finally, my chapters are starting to build up again; as in they're getting longer.**

**Special thanks to all my reviewers and followers and favorite-ers. **

**Goodnight (:**

**SDOW**


	9. Chapter9: Decisions, Decisions

**Block Estate  
>Living Room<br>Sunday, November 20  
>12:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

Landon, somewhat reluctantly, left my old estate and took off. Inez was still giving me half-hearted disapproving glances, not entirely pleased with my old tricks shining through. When I'd told Kendra, she'd just laughed her normal twinkling giggle and grabbed a mug of coffee. William, like usual, was already at work across town and wouldn't be seen until much later that day. I was used to it anyway.

"So, tell me about the university," Kendra ordered, crossing her long legs.

"It's… amazing. I love it there. I mean, the basic normal classes are average, but the writing and literature ones are the best," I responded, a pleased smile overtaking my features.

"That's good to hear; I must say, I was worried when you chose to not go to NYU or Columbia, considering they both have creative writing programs."

"Well, I was considering it, but I felt like a change in scenery," I shrugged.

"Well, I'm glad you like it dear. Like any mother, I only want what's best for you. Speaking of which, I think we may want to talk about this boy."

_Oh, you have to be kidding me_, I thought. "Nah, we don't need to," I assured, taking a large swig from my water bottle.

"Well," she started, not wanting to argue, "in the future perhaps you'll be a little more agreeable?"

"Maybe…" _Or maybe not. _

"So, that was Celia Crane's son though?" Kendra asked curiously.

"The one and only," I responded.

"How ironic then."

"How so?"

"Well, just a few weeks ago or something I met Celia myself and we hit it off. A very nice friend to have I would say. Even more so when you can tell that her son is falling for my daughter."

"He isn't falling for me, Kendra," I commented, using her first name in the situation.

"You don't see it do you? Oh well, it seems like you're falling too, so I guess it will come about eventually."

"What are you talking about; I don't see what?" My stomach started fluttering.

"Massie, honey, haven't you noticed how he looks at you?" she remarked and then added mischievously, "Or the way I saw you looking at him when he turned around and couldn't see your face."

"I think I'm done with this conversation," I exasperated, not telling her that I did in fact see it, but was unwilling to admit it. I stood up and dusted off my jeans.

"Well, we'll just have to finish it later," she replied cheerily, pointing a manicured fingernail at me before standing up as well.

"You know, I think I'm going to walk down to the old park."

"Alright, have fun."

I yanked on my favorite classic mauve knit Uggs and a red zip-up hoodie before slipping my sleek iPhone into my pocket and leaving.

The walk there consisted of passing a lot of things. My old school, Octavian Country Day, was as up-to-date and wonderful as ever. I'm sure there were a few lonely teachers sitting in there and grading or preparing lessons. The rain had stopped, but it was still a bit chilled outside.

When I got to the actual park, I started walking along the familiar path. Memories of linked arms with Alicia and Kristen and even Olivia came back. All of us from the group were considered a "clique" and ended up together because we were all interested in the UI campus. Luckily, we stayed together and ended up in the same university. It was something we were all thankful for; as we had become the closest bunch of people anybody had ever seen. Even though the boys went to our brother school, we still always got together once the school day was over.

"Massie?" a sweet voice purred.

I turned around and felt like running. There was the very kind redhead that I hated. "Dylan… what a surprise."

"Oh, how have you been? That's a stupid question, I should be saying sorry. So, I'm really sorry for what happened," she said genuinely, her emerald green eyes sparkling.

"Well, that's nice for you then," I replied bitterly. No, I didn't care how sweet she was. I'd experienced the bunch of stupidity under her innocent façade.

Dylan had always been such a sweetheart, cared about everyone. Maybe that's why it was so unbelievable when she stepped in and basically took my boyfriend. Whenever someone was in need, she helped them. Anyone who really knew her knew that she had a heart of gold, unless you tried to stand in the way of something she desperately wanted.

"I know you're still angry, you have every right to be," she drawled.

I shrugged.

"It was one of those really strong crushes, very hard to shake it off. We got caught up in the moment," she attempted to explain.

"I don't need to hear it, nor do I want to," I cut her off.

"Geez, sorry, I just don't want you to still be mad at me."

The anger was rapidly disappearing, but for different reasons than the expected. There wasn't anger there anymore because I'd finally been able to completely put my past behind me. And my future was beginning to become clearer and clearer.

"I'm not really mad anymore, I just don't care to hear any explanations," I admitted, adjusting the right on my middle finger.

"Oh. Um, if you don't mind my asking, why did I see a sparkly Cam get out of his car and stalk inside his house?" she asked.

I really wanted to end the conversation, but decided that I could hold off a little. "Oh, gift from a friend after I was, eh, sick. First thing that popped into my mind. Anyways, I have to get going."

"I see, have a good day."

"Uh huh," I shrugged before turning and speed-walking away. Really, I didn't care if the anger was gone, I did not want to be around the redheaded backstabber. Anyone with a heart like hers should know better, but I guess the truth sometimes has little misunderstood details.

I just kept walking, taking in the cool day and the brightly colored trees. But before I went very far, I yanked out my phone and fired off a quick text.

**Massie: Leesh, I think you were right.**

**-:-**

**Crane Household  
>Basement<br>Sunday, November 20  
>1:30p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I could not stop thinking about her. Every time I tried to switch my thoughts, something pulled Massie right back into my mind. It was driving me mildly insane. Everything she'd told me about Cam shocked me. Then again, I did sense something off about him, but I never expected…

And then in the kitchen, she was very close to kissing me and my heart started pounding and when she never did, I almost made the connection on my own. And then I had to remind myself that we were friends, no matter how many times she looked at me when she though I couldn't see.

Other than that, it was just getting worse and worse. Every single day, the same thoughts ran through my head. _Can she hear my heart beating? Oh, God, I hope not. Damn, now she's staring at me. Wow… never seen anything like that before. Keep yourself to yourself, you know how she is. Seriously, do my palms have to get clammy? _

I sighed again, picking up my full-size video camera and hooking it up to my laptop. The videos loaded onto my computer and I watched it anxiously. One of the biggest assignments of the semester, and I was almost finished.

"That's quite impressive," Celia commented midway through.

"Thanks," I replied, not even the slightest bit startled.

"Landon, I'm worried about you," she confessed, sitting on the couch beside me.

"And why is that?" I inquired, reorganizing a few clips.

"You just seem a lot more distant than the son I know," she commented.

"Distant?"

"Well, more than once since you've gotten home from wherever you won't say, you've gotten a faraway look in your eyes and pretty much zoned out. Not to mention the fact that after a few seconds a grin will start to flicker on your face."

"Oh…"

"So, since I'm positive after our conversation last night that it's a girl, why don't you tell your mother what's going on?"

"It's really that obvious, huh."

"Yeah, it really is, and you clearly need to do a lot more than call her…"

"It's Massie," I blurted.

"Kendra's daughter?" My mother's eyes widened slightly, but a smile played on her lips.

I paused the film. "Well, yeah. And that's where I went last night. She was having a bad day so I stayed with her. The thing is though, it's still just a friend thing and I've started to think that she knows but isn't willing to admit anything."

"I see, and I admit that I did not see the irony of this whole situation coming." She chuckled lightly. "Did you ever think to just tell her?"

"I can't do that. She told me three months ago that she only wanted a friendship out of it."

"That was three months ago, love." My mother had almost always used love as my nickname for no apparent reason. Somebody actually said that it made her sound British once…

"I don't know if it's changed," I answered.

"You don't know, or you don't _think_? You've got to do what feels right. Won't you feel terrible if it's too late?"

"I'll make it happen, just give me some time," I decided, determination searing in my veins.

"That's the Landon I know and proudly raised." Celia gave me a quick hug before disappearing into the study.

**-:-**

**Block Estate  
>Dining Room<br>Thursday, November 24  
>5:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

Everyone we'd ever associated and been close to was there. My family, along with Alicia's, Olivia's, Kristen's, Derrick's, Chris's, Josh's, and even Landon were all spread out among the large dining room table that we used only for holidays. It was a tradition that our families ate together on Thanksgiving; Celia and Landon were there as well because my mother and his had grown so close. It was a bit strange, but I found myself enjoying his presence.

Inez and all the adults were seated on one side and all of us from the university were seated on the other, instinctively separating. My father called for quiet and we went around, one-by-one, saying all that we were thankful for. My poetic went into overdrive, just like Alicia's, and a few people at the table looked pretty impressed in the way we could speak when we wanted.

That was finished and we all started eating. The boys got into a discussion about some football game and Olivia and Kristen began to discuss some new store downtown.

Alicia turned to me, setting down her water glass and smirking. "So, when did you realize that I was right?" she asked.

"Four days ago," I answered, twirling my fork in a small puddle of mashed potatoes.

"Well, when are you going to do something about it?"

"Who said I was going to do anything about it?" I asked a little too loudly. Landon looked over at me and raised an eyebrow. I smirked and turned back to Alicia. Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw him shake his head and turn back to the other guys.

"Oh come on, you cannot tell me that you haven't thought about it at all." Alicia gave me a look.

"Alright, so maybe I have, but I don't know. Isn't that kind of, eh, rude after earlier said words?"

"Not at all, but I'm gaining on it by the New Year," she stated.

"It isn't your decision," I noted teasingly.

"I know, but come on; you can't even deny it anymore so why wait?"

"Well, I think I just need to let what is going to happen, happen. I can't predict anything and neither can you. So, yeah, maybe I've thought about it, but it doesn't mean I need to do anything."

"Aye aye aye…"

"You sound like a creep when you say that," I snickered.

"Well, until then, I vow to keep my mouth shut and not tell anyone, just for you," she promised, ignoring my comment.

"Thank you." I smiled and she smiled back before we both turned to enjoy the rest of the holiday with our family.

**-:-**

**I know, this is a **_**short**_** chapter, but I'm skipping ahead to more of the winter times next chapter. So within a few chapters, well, I think you can see something coming.**

**Now, I have a question that will hopefully be answered by someone. Which would be better, if Landon or Massie made the move? I already have to alternate versions in my head, and kind of am leaning towards Massie. But your opinion is important to me, so I want your input too.**

**Review?**

**SDOW**


	10. Chapter10: Imagine That

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Friday, December 16  
>6:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I stared wistfully out of the dorm window at the darkened night and sparkling white snow. Oh yes, we were definitely breaking Iowa snow records that winter. Just my luck. Don't get me wrong, the snow was amazing, but if it got too bad, all the flights we had to New York would be cancelled.

"I know, worries you doesn't it?" Alicia sighed, coming over to stand by me. She handed me a mug of hot chocolate and I took it gratefully, remembering to thank her.

"Completely, it's so bad… If the predictions are right, which they say they're more accurate here, then we may have some real problems."

"Hey, they say first Christmas away from home isn't too bad if you've got your friends."

I nodded. "I know, but it will be different. Why are we even dwelling on this though? It hasn't even happened."

She chuckled. "Good point."

"Anyway, break starts in four days. Which, I find it a little odd that they end Tuesday for winter break, but oh well. At least it is something."

"Hey, at least it's one step closer to New Year's."

"Oh, shut up," I teased.

Outside, more snow was starting to fall. They were the large, fluffy flakes, swirling down from the sky slowly. It was almost as if they had a whole crowd anticipating their arrival.

"I'm just saying." Alicia shrugged and took a sip of her hot chocolate.

"Are you still scared?" she asked suddenly, still gazing out the window. The only light in the room was coming from two lamps, one by each of our beds.

"Yeah… but I also know that the only way to get over fear is to face it." The heated radiating off of the mug warmed up my chilled hands.

"I remember what that's like. Chris was very much the same way when we met. Although, before we dated I never pegged him as the nervous type," Alicia contributed.

I nodded. You never really do peg anyone as anything until you really get to know them; or you think they're something that they're not. You never really do know until you see the truth.

"What if it's too late?" I asked quietly, still watching the silent fluff outside.

"Too late for what?" she questioned.

"Like, he's with another girl and just never told me…"

"I seriously doubt he wouldn't tell you that. By the way, I never knew you were big on 'what if's'." Alicia gulped another mouthful of the warm liquid. "Besides, do you really think that's how it is after everything?"

"No, but some people have different sides."

"True, but… eh, I'll just keep my mouth shut. No more arguing, we might be stuck in the same room for a while," she gave in.

"Agreed," I acknowledged.

"Can I just say one thing though?"

I sighed, "Shoot."

"Just in case it would ever really become too late, you might want to hurry up," Alicia advised, giving me an uncannily knowing look.

"I know…" I shook my head. "Well, I guess I know what to get him for Christmas this year, but his Christmas might come a little early."

"I have a hunch that Landon will positively love your Christmas gift."

**University of Iowa  
>Film Production Class<br>Monday, December 19  
>9:23a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I sat pulling through the clips and dragging certain scenes into other sections to make the film fit together better. The film as a whole was almost finished, aside from a few minor edits and sound effects.

That morning in the hallway I'd nearly ran into Massie again, only this time she knew who I was and smiled at me before edging around and continuing on. My eyes followed her until she was out of my direct range of eyesight before I continued on to my next class.

The two professors in the building who hated to actually be called professor were my own film professor and the creative writing professor. So, we were just stuck referring to the film teacher as "Mr. Caverly."

At that point though, it was official, all flights to Westchester County were cancelled, and the snow was too bad in both Iowa City and White Plains. _(White Plains is in Westchester County.) _It was kind of sad; the only comfort was knowing that all the rest of us would be stuck here too. Specifically, the whole winter break would be spent hanging around with the group and doing what Derrick referred to as my "ogling-gaze" anytime Massie walked into a room.

I was upset, yes, because my mother lived alone while I wasn't there, although she'd probably end up with her latest boyfriend and the Block's in the end. It was kind of strange how close the two families had gotten, but I just shrugged it off and let her be happy.

"Mr. Crane, can you please inform the class what some of your inspirations are," the elderly professor asked.

"Well, eh, being around certain people can inspire me, or one of those perfect moments in nature and stuff like that," I answered, thinking it over, yet not answering completely.

"I see," he replied, nodding, "tomorrow we will turn in those films and then you'll be done until after winter break."

Everyone nodded and just went back to what they were doing.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Wednesday, December 21  
>7:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I stared into the semi-darkness of the dorm with my mouth shut and my mind wandering.

Landon was on my mind, in my mind, possibly glued to my mind. The way he ran a hand through his hair when he didn't know how to respond; how he tapped out subconscious beats when he got really deep in thought; the lone dimple that appeared whenever he grinned or smiled; how his eyes, although technically teal, sometimes took on a look like they were emerald green or navy blue before they switched back; how his voice sent a shiver up my spine. It was terrible and wonderful at the same time.

"_Massie_!" Alicia shouted. "God, you think after saying your name five times you'd listen.

"Sorry, lost in my thoughts again," I shrugged.

She grinned, "Yeah, I know. Anyway, I was just saying that I am going out to see a movie with Chris before the roads get closed again."

"Alright, have fun."

"I'll try," she responded before leaving.

I sat alone in the room at that point. Something was gnawing at the back of my mind and I knew exactly what it was.

I yanked on my newest boots and shrugged my sweatshirt on as well. Bounding into the cold night, I started to stride across the snow. My plan was to just walk across the campus to the boys' dorms and see what would happen. "Merry Christmas," I murmured to myself.

By the time I got to the right dorm, I was chilled thoroughly. I knocked on the door and leaned against the doorframe.

"Massie?" Landon sounded surprised, if not pleased.

"Hey," I greeted. He stepped back and I went inside. Derrick, luckily, was nowhere to be found. He gazed at me for a moment and I wondered what in the world I was thinking.

Before I could dwell further and back out of it, I leaned forwards and pressed my lips against his. I admit his kiss seemed a lot more like an old comfort then a foreign place. He stumbled backwards a few inches at the sudden contact.

After a few seconds, we simultaneously pulled back. More than anything, a look of astonishment was on his face. I couldn't help but smile at the way a warm feeling was spreading through my body and how my lips seemed to be tingling.

"What was that?" he asked, his blue/green eyes slightly larger than usual and one eyebrow rose.

"I just thought I should let you know."

"Let me know what?"

"Let you know that I'm starting to hate being your friend," I admitted.

"That makes two of us," he replied, a grin finally spreading.

"You know, this is your fault," I noted.

"How is it my fault?"

"A lot of reasons, but that can wait."

Both of us leaned forwards again, but that time, his hands intertwined in my hair while my arms were draped around the back of his neck. You know how they say that sparks seem to shoot through when you're with that one person? I never believed that until that moment. I was still scared as hell, but I was finally ready for the ride.

Right as the oxygen levels were starting to lower even further, Derrick chose to burst into the room. Neither of us noticed until he cleared his throat. We pulled apart and I sheepishly looked down at the floor while Landon just looked off to the side.

"Um…" I started, not knowing how to respond. Landon ran a hand through his shaggy black hair.

"Should I go?" Derrick asked, his caramel eyes switching between us.

"No, but I might want to," I responded, looking up raking my fingers through my hair to straighten it back out a little. "Have a good night you two."

I smiled one last time at Landon before exiting the dorm and twirling into the cold night.

**-(0)- **

**9:00p.m.**

"Hey," Alicia greeted, walking into the dorm and draping her pea coat over the back of her computer chair.

"Hey. Did you have a good time?" I turned the page of the newest book I was reading.

"Yep, it was a surprisingly good movie," she shrugged. "What did you do while I was gone?"

"Oh, I did some stuff," I answered, turning the page again.

"Some stuff?"

"In other words, I made sure to deliver that Christmas present," I told her.

She just stared for a few seconds before realization dawned brightly. "Oh, I understand now." She smirked before it turned into a smile.

"Yup," I replied, popping the 'p'.

"Well, was it what you imagined?"

I smiled; the memory of the little sparks and the passion that one little action held came propelling back. "Actually, it was a lot… better than I was expecting. That is, until Derrick decided to walk in…"

"Oh my, that poor guy. Plus, he owes Kristen twenty or something like that now."

"Were you guys betting on this or something?" I asked, mildly incredulous.

"I couldn't, you were telling me stuff, but Derrick wasn't told anything so he got involved with Kristen. Olivia decided to go against Josh since they're a couple. And well, Chris just shrugged and said he didn't really care," Alicia contributed.

"Ridiculous," I chuckled.

"Yes, but you know it wouldn't be the same without them."

"Touché."

"Anyway, back to the earlier discussion. Are you two together now then?" Alicia grilled me.

I had to think about that one. No, we were not technically together; the situation could be called friends with benefits at that point. "Eh, no?"

"You say that like you're asking me," she snickered.

"I don't know. Not technically by most terms I guess. We didn't exactly have time to talk…"

"I see, you kissed and then Derrick walked in and the mood was killed."

"More than just plain killed, it was flat out slaughtered."

We exchanged a knowing glance before our small smiles opened up and girly laughter escaped. A second later, the door was pushed open and Olivia came in dragging Kristen behind her.

"It is so cold out there, but we braved it so we could have a girl's nail session," Olivia announced, her navy eyes bright. Kristen swept her dirty blonde hair up into a ponytail and nodded.

"Wait a second, what are you to giggling about?" Kristen asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," I shrugged, shooting Alicia a glance.

Olivia sighed and tossed her straight blonde hair over one shoulder. "I brought everything I have that has glitter in it," she proudly inserted, unearthing several bottles of brightly colored nail polish from her coat pockets.

I grinned, glad that it was so easy to get off the subject of something with her. Kristen on the other hand would not be so easy.

For the next few hours, we put on a movie and started to carefully coat each nail. Neither Alicia nor I did our fingers though because we had on acrylics. Kristen and Olivia rolled their eyes in unison at that one.

By the time midnight was approaching, all four of us were starting to come off our second winds considering we'd all been up since seven that morning.

As the beds weren't too small and we were all best friends, we just split up. Kristen and I were on one side and Alicia and Olivia on the other. A double set of very soft, hardly noticeable snores came from the side of the room and Kristen spoke up.

"Massie, are you still awake?" she asked.

"Not for long," I muttered, curling up against my pillow.

"Will you at least tell me what's changed your mood even more in the last twenty-four hours?"

"It's nothing…"

"Oh come on."

"Let's just put it this way," I sighed, "Derrick owes you twenty dollars now."

Kristen gave a little gasp and I fell into the world of dream-filled oblivion.

_**(Back track…)**_

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Wednesday, November 21  
>7:35p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

"Dammit, now I owe Kristen twenty bucks. Not to mention that was kind of awkward," Derrick grumbled.

"Awkward for you maybe. I thought it was pretty amazing…" I trailed off as the feeling of kissing Massie pressed back into my memory.

He rolled his eyes. "Well, good for you. Glad you finally got the courage to do it."

"Actually, I didn't. The first one was all her," I admitted. Derrick jaw might as well have unhinged from his face. "If it were me it would've been New Year's."

"Massie? The Massie we all know started that?" I chuckled lightly at how stunned his expression had become.

"That's what I said, isn't it?" I sat down on the bed and leaned my head against the wall.

"Oh… Well, being the great friend I am, I'm going to be straightforward. Was it what you expected?"

I sighed. "No, not really, it was a lot better than I could have possibly imagined."

"That good, huh?"

"Let's put it this way, it won't be something that I'll easily forget."

"Well then, if you plan to do it in here again, try to be more careful. I'm not one who finds pleasure on walking in on two of his friends making out." Derrick shook his head as I rolled my eyes and settled back against the bed, thoughts of her still roaming my head.

"We need a guys' night," Josh announced, suddenly popping into the room with Chris at his wake.

"I brought video games," Chris offered, splaying out a few in each hand.

Josh, the more observant of the two, looked hard at my expression and then Derrick's. "What's going on here?" he asked, suspicion rising slightly in his tone.

Before I could protest anything, or deny it, Derrick smirked and stated, "Oh, I just caught him making out with our friend in here."

_Oh crap_, that little voice shouted in my head. I opened my mouth, and then shut it again, not knowing how to respond.

"Our friend?" Josh knitted his eyebrows and Derrick gave him a look. "Oh, that friend. Well, I won that part of the bet."

Chris stood in the background with a slight smirk and gave me a thumbs-up. Josh patted my back. I just stood there awkwardly, not sure how to respond to Derrick's usual annoyance.

"Well then, aside from that, who wants to play some video games?" Chris suggested, thankfully pulling the attention away from me.

"I'm in."

"Let's do this."

"Ha, I bet I'll win."

**-:-**

**Finally, just finally, they are together. Sort of anyway… ;) **

**I'm thinking of writing a Twilight FanFic as I got a request from my editor for NSBL and a few others. Any thoughts?**

**And yes, I did lean towards Massie because it just seems like it would be more of a surprise to everyone if she's the one who broke down first. **

**My rambles aside, I would like to once again thank all my reviewers and story-alerters and all of you awesome people out there who are reading this! The next chapter should be at least a little bit longer. **

**Halo or Horns?**

**SDOW**


	11. Chapter11: Shall We?

**Alright, I don't know how many of you caught it, but last chapter I accidently put November at one point instead of December. My bad… sorry? (:**

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Dining Hall<br>Thursday, December 22  
>9:45a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

That morning was like any other; Derrick, Chris, Josh, and I were all already spread out among the usual table before the girls arrived. The snow had stopped for a while, leaving a good eight inch layer outside to chill the university.

"So, any guesses as to how long they'll make us wait this time?" Chris asked, taking a drink of what I assumed was coffee.

"I give it about ten seconds," Josh announced, glancing out the door. Sure enough, four girls came parading in a few seconds later, all with very agitated looks on their faces.

Each one took their respective seat and stared straight ahead, not at one particular person or item.

"Are you okay?" I asked Massie, wondering what had her in a mood.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, great." She gave a tight smile before turning back to spacing out.

Underneath the table, I found her hand and squeezed it gently. She looked up at me and smiled for real this time. Obviously, something had happened, but she wasn't about to speak up about it.

Kristen and Alicia both snapped out of it and the table filled with our usual babble. The whole seating was arrangement was kind of assigned since day one.

"Alright, what am I missing?" Olivia whined, looking between Massie and me. She was clearly the only one at the table who had no idea what had happened.

Seven pairs of eyebrows shot up at her and she tilted her head to one side, blinking in a confused look. Her face lit up. "Oh, ha ha, _that_. I knew that, it just seems like I missing something else," she shrugged. So, we were wrong, she had picked up on the newest change between "the group", specifically Massie and me.

Speaking of Massie, her eyes flitted in my direction again and I caught the gaze, my whole mind going blank. What could easily have been seconds, minutes, or hours later I tore my gaze and started to rejoin the rest of the world.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Campus Grounds<br>Thursday, December 22  
>10:25a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"You know we never did finish our conversation last night," Landon remarked.

The two of us were ambling along the campus, our hands intertwined.

"If I recall correctly both of us had our minds elsewhere," I noted, biting down on my usual smirk.

"Well, would you like to elaborate on earlier statements?" he continued.

"Depends on the statement."

"You said that it was my fault."

"Well, it is your fault that I did what I did," I shrugged.

"How is it my fault? It was your decision, although I don't particularly mind…"

"Ever since you came crashing into me in the hallway, you began something, like some sort of focused epidemic."

"Alright, you lost me," Landon admitted, cocking one eyebrow.

I shook my head. My rules had long since been domino-ed. "Like I said, your virus started that day in the hallway."

"So, now I'm a virus?"

"Hypothetically, but in a good way. Anyways, I guess it kind of hit me right before Thanksgiving; right at the point of the road trip and the, uh, incident."

"And that's my fault?"

"Yeah."

"How?"

"It involves those details that I still refuse to go in to, no matter what you say or do." I gave him a half-devious grin.

Landon shook his head. "That doesn't mean I won't try." He paused. "You know, I'm kind of curious, where exactly does this put _us_?"

"I hadn't thought much about it; didn't have much time to dwell on anything at that point." Which was true, I had a very hard time focusing on much by the time we had been interrupted.

He was quiet for a moment, possibly pondering an answer to his own question. I was thinking about it myself. I mean, by the twenty-second, it could easily and technically be a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Yet at the same time, didn't most people actually date if they were going to date. Does a kiss change a situation?

"Where do you _want_ it to be?" I inquired, pretty sure my own thought wouldn't be too far off his mark.

"By now, is it even necessary to ask?" He seemed amused. "And you?"

"Basically the same boat."

"Well then."

"I guess that's that."

"So that aside, do you want to go to a movie tonight?" he asked, glancing down at me with that infamous grin.

"I'd like that," I answered, looking up to meet his gaze.

**-(0)- **

**4:00p.m.**

I sat in my computer chair, my hands hovering over the keys of my laptop. We had a new writing assignment, to tell a story about somebody you knew. It didn't actually have to be true, but it was more likely to make sense if you didn't make up some random story about a person you were friends with.

On instinct, I pulled through the depths of my brain to remember all the stories I'd ever been told. One in particular caught my eye, but it would be a few more days before I could decide on something like that. The project was meant to only be started over the break. My professor, Mrs. Booke, wanted them to be long and detailed and one of our best works of the year. She wanted it to be something that we actually had to look into and not just write out our own plot, but learn how to write out other people's stories as well, something about it being quite useful later in any kind of writing career.

"Are you still blocked on it too?" Alicia implored, tapping one acrylic against her own laptop.

"Yes, I mean, I've got a few leads, but nothing other than that," I sighed.

"I wonder if a hidden purpose of this whole thing was to keep us busy because she knew we wouldn't want to go outside," she reflected.

"Like some kind of witch who descends from the mystical island of Iberian."

"Iberian?"

"I don't know, I think it's a word."

"So, now that we have a theory on the secret whereabouts of our creative writing professor, is there anything else nonfictional that you can think of?"

"There is one thing that seems like it'd be good, but I'd have to look more into it. Have you thought of anything in the last few procrastinating minutes?"

"Chris told me this really weird thing that happened to him once, but I'd have to ask him to fill in the spots I don't remember," she shrugged.

"Oh, mine is from something Landon told me once. I should ask him about it tonight," I mused.

With a click, I closed the top of my laptop and got up, flopping down onto my bed with a resigned sigh. Out of habit, I reached over and turned on my iHome, the sound of whatever my iPod played quietly streaming through the speakers.

Jason Derulo's _In My Head_ came on and I tapped my nails against one another to the beat. My back sunk into the mattress cover on the bed and I tried to dig deeper in my brain for more of the stories.

A few minutes passed by with the steady stream of music and tapping. "Speaking of Landon, word on the street is that you two are officially an item?" Alicia smirked in my direction.

"Who told you that?"

"Nobody, I just guessed, but you're supposed to tell me these things anyway."

"Well then, the word wasn't lying, but people really should stop writing on the streets," I joked.

"That was kind of lame…"

"Yeah, I know."

The noise that ensued was only my music and our two combined tapping forces. With a swift glance out the window, I realized that it had started to snow very lightly again.

"You were right, it's easier to not miss my family with you guys around," I replied.

"I told you, although I miss mine too. It would have been nice if we weren't stuck here, but with the roads closing and opening all the time, the most exotic place we have is that one Mexican restaurant across town." She reached over and turned up the music slightly.

"Yes, and we all know how classy that place is," I scoffed.

She paused. "Can you believe we're going into the second semester of college?"

"No, it seems like just yesterday we were apprehensive about our professors."

"Or just yesterday that you were barreling into someone in the hallway…" She smirked.

"Oh, shut up, that was as much his fault as mine," I pointed out in a teasing tone.

"Hmm, I'm sure you really mind that now."

I rolled my eyes and glanced at the clock. "Do you realize we just spent an hour debating all this random stuff that doesn't have a purpose?"

"Your ways have rubbed off on me. What can I say?" She shrugged playfully.

"Oh yes, that is totally me. Sorry, Alicia." I shook my head and cracked a smile.

**-:-**

**Iowa City  
>Movie Theater<br>Thursday, December 22  
>7:30<strong>

**LC;**

We got into the movie theater upon getting tickets and sat in the very back, high up where both Massie and I preferred it. I was mildly surprised that she actually agreed to see _The Hangover Part II; _I'd never noticed that she was into that type of thing.

We really were the only ones in the back, the room wasn't much filled. There was a sizable amount of others, but most people didn't have the guts to brave the winter weather.

On recently gained instinct, I grasped Massie's hand once we'd sat down in the seats. I noticed that it had always been my instinct, but I no longer had to ignore it.

"Hey, you know that one story you told me one time; I think it was your 4th of July part or something?" she inquired, tilting her head to one side.

I scanned my brain for a few seconds. "Oh yeah, the one from junior year."

"Alright."

"Why?"

"I'll tell you later," she brushed it off.

The movie started to play and I was content with just holding onto her hand. By then it was very possibly that our hands had created a specific mold for each other. It was amazing how much you could hold hands in the span of twenty-four hours.

"Dude…" Massie muttered, looking slightly disturbed. Why had I never heard her use the term 'dude' before? I looked up and realized what she was referring to, nearly busting into that one form of uncontrollable laughter.

"Regretting your decision?" I whispered back.

By the look on her face, I could tell she wasn't paying attention to what she was actually saying. "Not entirely, I mean, at least I'm here with you."

"Glad to hear it," I chuckled softly, turning back to the screen.

The rest of the movie seemed to pass by in a blur. Strangely enough, as if we were the same person, we laughed at exactly the same time at exactly the same thing for the whole movie. By the time it was over, I was quite possibly laughed out for the rest of the night. It was just past nine at that point.

We made it out of theater, by that point alternating from hand in hand to my arm around her shoulder and her arm around my waist.

Ambling slowly back to my truck (which we took after hesitance on her part), I noticed her eyes kept flickering over to look at me. The amber colored orbs were gleaming with moisture from laughing and what looked like joy.

"Well that was, eh, fun. Thank you," she replied, looking upwards to meet my eyes. We were a least a half-foot or more different in height.

"It really was my pleasure," I answered.

"Your _pleasure_?" Massie let the word roll of her tongue with puzzlement.

"Yep."

"Nice." I walked around the other side of the truck as she hopped up on the one side. I slipped into the driver's seat and turned the key into the ignition.

"Anyways, you were planning on telling me that story about the 4th." She'd remembered.

"Oh, the epic night of dares?" I inquired, assuming that was the one she was referring to.

"That's the one." She gave a nod.

"It actually started as an innocent game of truth or dare, but Griffin is probably one of the worst when it comes to daring…" I shook my head. "Anyway, it was all five of us guys against the set of five girls. Basically, we went down in the line and nobody, not even the girls, would choose truth, even though it was probably the smartest decision.

"Griffin started with fairly okay dares. This one girl, Kori I think, was instructed to run back and forth across the very crowded beach singing the Barbie Girl song in the best Irish accent she could muster."

"Why Irish?" she interjected, already enraptured.

I blinked a few times. "He was torn between Irish and Australian, but I don't know why."

She tilted her head slightly, but willed me to continue with a wave of her hand.

"Of course, Griffin had started a little bond with Kemp. Kemp was actually the one who took me down. It was… interesting.

"My dare was actually to sit on Griffin's lap and attempt to make out with a poster for three rounds. You can probably imagine how awkward that was, considering we were both in nothing but swim trunks and the only poster they could find was of Lady Gaga…" I sighed.

Massie was watching me with widened eyes and a smirk. I took a left before continuing.

"I want it known right now that I retaliated. Kemp had to say I love you to every single person on the beach and then sit down in the middle of a crowd and scream that he'd lost his pet goat in Norway. It was quite the site, considering half the people on the beach were drunk and the other half were backing away in fright or screaming at him for being an idiot. I was quite pleased. The simple immaturity of such things is quite a gift to behold."

"Any other pranks or dares that you or others did that night?" she asked, pulling a miniature notebook and a pen out, scribbling down what I'd said in the darkness of my truck.

"I'll tell you more if you tell me what it's even for."

"Oh, I have a writing assignment to find a story someone tells me and write it down. It has to be quite spectacular."

"Alright," I agreed. I went on to explain at least ten more of our foolish dares and pranks, ranging from doing the hokey-pokey with a bra on (if you were a guy) until you got kicked out of a store or following someone around like a lost puppy.

By the time I was finished, her eyes were glittering with amusement and we had just arrived at the university. I turned off the car as she slipped the notebook and pen back into her purse.

Upon getting out, I went to the other side and helped her down, even though she insisted that she was fine. Together, hand in hand per usual, we made our way to the girls' dorms.

"I believe this is where we part," Massie acknowledged when we were standing outside of her dorm door.

"I suppose you're right," I nodded.

"Thanks again, I did have fun. And I'm not just talking about the movie, those stories will come in handy."

"Like I said, the pleasure is all mine." I grinned again. Massie smiled in response before reaching up to give me a quick kiss and then disappearing into her dorm.

Of course, that left my heart racing and I shook my head once, heading back to my own dorm to call it a night.

**-:-**

**Yeah, I know, that kind of sucked. But that's because I'm trying to give them a few chapters before anything drastic is discovered. Anyway, Christmas is almost here (in the story…) so that should be interesting to describe.**

**Also, I will soon be starting another Clique story, and although my idea of an OTP is definitely Mandon, I was thinking of doing either a Cassie or a Massington. I'm sure on it, so I'm asking seriously for your opinion. **

**Anyway, have a good night. **

**Smiles :3**

**SDOW**


	12. Chapter12: The 12 Days of Christmas

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Sunday, December 25  
>6:20p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"It's kind of weird, driving out to go to dinner on Christmas and then planning to spend the rest of it in the common room or whatever they call it here," I remarked, adjusting one of my bangles.

"True, very true. But then again, at least we aren't totally alone," Alicia added, pulling on a jacket.

"I know, eight of us in all, but it's still weird."

"What's weird?" Kristen asked, walking in with Olivia behind her.

"We were just talking about the strangeness of it all," Alicia answered, looking out the window.

I looked out the window and stared. The snow had gotten up to about fourteen or fifteen inches.

"Aren't we supposed to meet the guys in the parking lot?" Olivia inquired, tilting her head so that a curtain of blonde hair fell sideways.

"Oh, I forgot about that. We should get moving," I answered.

The four of us made our way out of the dorm room and trudged through the snow out to the parking lot. Each boyfriend was leaning against their car, refusing to let us girls drive in their small cars, even my car, which did come with four-wheel-drive. I walked up to Landon who greeted me with a hug before grinning and disappearing around the driver's side.

With a quick eye roll, I climbed up into his truck and gave him a very pointed look.

"What?" he asked incredulously.

"I think you just don't like my car," I answered, raising one eyebrow.

"No, it's a nice car, but I prefer not to ride in it." He grinned again.

"And if I said that about your truck I would never here the end of it," I teased.

"Oh well. Merry Christmas." Landon was definitely in high spirits considering the situation.

"Merry Christmas to you too," I chuckled. He backed up and followed the line of the other three cars, heading to one of those hole-in-the-wall restaurants that were fantastic but partially hidden.

I looked out the window as a very light, hopefully non-sticking snow began to descend.

"Aren't the winter supposed to be smaller than this here?" I asked, still staring into the white fluff-filled air.

"Yes, but everyone has the oddballs once in a while," he responded.

With a small nod, I settled farther back into the seat and just watched him drive. Whether he noticed or not was hard to tell because he kept his eyes on the road, but a slight smile seemed to be tugging at the edge of his lips. I figured that he did know because his eyes flitted in my direction every once in a while.

"We're here," he announced, parallel parking not far from the restaurant.

With a small hop, I got down at of the truck and went around to the other side. Landon hooked his arm around my shoulder and led me across the street and up to the door.

Alicia and Chris were just ahead of us, Josh and Olivia behind. Derrick and Kristen were already seated thanks to reservations.

We all sat down around the rectangle table and already had their "Christmas Special"-whatever that was- being prepared.

"Eh, this is different," Olivia giggled.

"I could get used to it," Kristen replied, tilting her head against Derrick's shoulder.

"I think I could to," he said in turn.

"Definitely, although it would suck if we were without our families every year," Alicia noted.

"Yeah, that does make sense. There's always summer and stuff though," Josh retorted.

"Very true," Chris nodded.

"Maybe we should just enjoy each other's company and stop talking about it?" I suggested.

"And somebody talks some sense," Landon responded, catching my hand under the table like usual.

I half expected him to add "Hallelujah" or something, just out of common notion. He brushed his thumb against the side of my hand and left it tingling whenever it moved to the other side. Also as usual, I savored the feeling of it, knowing he'd let go eventually only to start holding it again later.

_The 12 Days of Christmas _played softly from the speakers in honor of the holiday. Idle chit-chat filled the space as we waited for the meals, which came out fairly quickly. A set of waiters came out and set the plates down, along with their special eggnog, which I was hesitant to try at first.

"Do you ever feel compelled to burst out in song?" Josh asked at one point, twirling his fork around in sweet potatoes.

"No, but I'm sure that's how you're feeling right now." Chris chuckled to himself.

"And why would you assume that?"

"Because you asked…"

"Oh, I guess that makes sense then." Olivia giggled at her boyfriend. Between the guys, you could have a comedy show, but between the girls, you would get more of a drama-filled and cliché show.

"Weirdest Christmas ever…" I murmured, letting a smile peek out from behind my lips.

"Aw, you know you love it," Landon teased, putting a piece of something (I'm not sure what it was…) in his mouth.

"Alright, I'll give you that."

The rest of the time at the restaurant was spent eating, talking, laughing, and just grinning. All of us were in incredibly high spirits considering we were stuck in Iowa City.

After we each put down the money and got up to leave, Landon led me back out to his truck. Halfway through the street though, of course, I slipped. I would've gone down completely had he not been holding onto my waist in the first place.

"Hmm, I told you to be careful," he noted.

"Whoops?"

Landon shook his head and got me around to the other side and insisted, although unneeded, upon helping me into the truck before going around to the other side and climbing up.

The drive back was mildly quiet, just a few remarks and such.

Once we got back to the university, every single one out of the eight of us made our way into the living room-type spot in the girls' dorms. Most of the other girls were with their boyfriends or had decided to brave the roads and drive home. That was the problem, the snow wasn't utterly terrible, but the ice was very real and not pleasant.

"It's awfully quiet…" Chris sighed.

"It usually is." Alicia shrugged in response to her boyfriend's comment.

"Well, now that we're here, I think we know what time it is," Kristen grinned.

I laughed and held up my tote. "Already got mine," turning to the guys I continued, "and this would be why we carry such large purses sometimes."

Josh and Derrick both sighed. "Oops, we'll be right back…"

Landon and Chris shared a look before grabbing two different sets out of the cupboards. Kristen, Olivia, and Alicia had done the same as I had, putting what they could in their purses. As a comprise, we'd agreed to get every female the same thing and every male the same thing. Only two sets of Christmas presents were needed, making it much simpler.

Landon sat down on one of the large-_er_ arm chairs and looked at me before gently gesturing for me to sit on his lap.

"Nope," I replied, switching out of my Uggs into a pair Deerfoam slippers.

"Yes you are…"

"No, I can almost guarantee that I'm not."

"You did say almost," he replied.

"Only because I never know what you're going to pull, or how many people might suddenly show up."

For the first time ever, I witnessed him roll his eyes. It had never been something very common; I think he actually picked it up from me…

"Please?" For a second I thought he was going to pull the puppy-dog face, which probably would've worked so I'm glad he didn't.

"You two are so weird," Alicia mused, looking at the way we were playfully arguing.

I looked up and grinned. "Coming from the girl who-"

"_Anyway… _Here come the other two guys." She cut me off with a teasing glare and her own statement.

In an effort to at least keep him quiet, I perched on the arm of the chair and pulled the different packages out of my purse, pulling off the cover so that it was just seven individual things.

Throughout the room, Derrick and Kristen grabbed one side of a couch, Olivia and Josh on the other while Chris and Alicia took the loveseat.

"I'll start!" Olivia squealed rather loudly. And that's how it went on for a while.

Olivia gave the girls all three different bottles of her latest obsession, nail polish from the Pure Ice brand; she then proceeded to give each of the boys a personalized T-shirt. Josh took the stand after her, giving the guys each some sort of watch thing and giving us girls gift cards.

"Hmm, that hard to come up with something?" I teased after thanking him.

"At least I didn't get them to the first place that came into my mind." Josh smirked. I eyed him momentarily before shaking my head and curling my legs up on the edge of the chair.

"Whatever, I'm next," Derrick volunteered. He gave each of the males some certificate to personalized Converse or something- his newest discovery online. The girls received knit hats; he must have been on a clothing hunt.

Kristen followed suit and handed each of us a different customized notebook and the guys each a box of cookies. "I go on the theory that if you keep them full you keep them happy," she shrugged.

"That's sometimes very true," Derrick agreed from beside her.

Alicia shook her head and passed out three different scrapbooks to the girls, each showing the tons of pictures she'd taken of all of us together. With the guys, she pulled a Josh and just handed out various gift cards. Chris went after his girlfriend, giving the guys a new pair of headphones (also claiming that they couldn't use the same pair forever) and the girls each a candle. I almost started laughing at that… almost. It was kind of strange, possibly the first thing that came to his mind, but kind of sweet.

I took the liberty of going next. For Alicia, Kristen, and Olivia, I got a bracelet, all with different friendship inscriptions on the back. For the guys, I got each of them a wallet, not knowing what else to go for.

"Guess that leaves me," Landon remarked.

"Pretty much," I answered. He raised an eyebrow before turning back and giving each male a baseball hat and each female… Lip gloss?

"Landon…?" I asked cautiously, wondering how on earth he'd figured out exactly what kind each of us girls used.

"Yes?"

"Were you going through my makeup bag; and Alicia's, Olivia's, and Kristen's?"

"No. You only put yours on about twenty times a day, and all I had to do was ask those three for the others. Besides, Derrick suggested it." He gestured to the other guys at the "those three" part.

I shook my head. What were they thinking when they said that girls were the biggest partners in crime? They evidently had not met the four guys throughout the room.

"You know what I think?" Alicia asked. When nobody responded she continued, "We should have a movie marathon like we did on Halloween. Of course, it would be Christmas movies this time I guess, but it was still pretty fun."

For a few seconds we all thought about it before the agreements rang out.

"I'm in."

"It was fun last time."

"None of that lame crap."

"It's Christmas, deal with it."

"Let's just go."

"_Thank you_!"

**-(0)-**

**9:00p.m.**

By nine o'clock, we were all seated around the room. The eight of us were just barely into the first movie and you could already tell that it would end up as another big, overnight event.

I was still sitting at the time, and looked down at my jeans. "I'm going to go change," I said quietly, standing up and grabbing a pair of pajamas from my drawer and heading into the bathroom. Once in there, I closed the door and washed off my face before putting on my nightly moisturizer.

I then switched out of my jeans and blouse and into purple plaid pajama pants and a slightly tight black T-shirt. I brushed my teeth quickly and then went back out into the room. Landon looked at me for a few seconds longer than usual, as if evaluating my outfit.

With a small shake of my head, I sat down on my bed beside him and laid my head down on his shoulder as the movie continued.

**-(0)-**

**10:55p.m.**

**LC;**

I couldn't help but smile, feeling like it was better than an average Christmas present. I mean, honestly, the girl who I'd almost lost hope of more than a friendship from was curled up against my side, her head resting lightly on my shoulder. One of my own arms was around her waist, holding her close.

It was different, having to be stuck away from our families because of flights and road conditions, but it felt a lot better with all the guys around, the strange girl conversations, and of course Massie.

Everyone in the room, including myself, was in a very mixed move. Half of our bodies were on the verge of passing out, the other possibly trying to stay up till dawn. At that point it was just past eleven and across the room Olivia still seemed kind of bouncy and bright like it was noon. Massie must have noticed it too because she looked up, rolled her eyes, and snuggled further into my side.

The movie wore on further. Around an hour later, we'd switched from sitting to lying on the bed, one large blanket covering the both of us. Massie seemed to be staring at the ceiling though.

"Are you even watching the movie anymore?" I inquired in a whisper.

She turned her head to face me. "Not anymore."

"Is it boring you?"

"I guess I just kind of tuned it out," she admitted. Did she really have to look straight into my eyes? There goes the whole holding-onto-your-thoughts attempt…

"I see…" I was quiet for a moment, our breathing in sync.

"Do you two care if I turn this off? Everyone else is out like a light," Alicia whispered from across the room.

Massie just shrugged her free shoulder. "Nah, go ahead," I responded. A few seconds later, the TV turned off with a soft click, bathing the room in complete darkness.

Despite the darkness, I could still _feel _her gaze against mine. I still remember the last time she'd voluntarily- well, kind of voluntarily- slept in my arms. It was over Thanksgiving break and it was still friendly. Of course, unbeknownst to her, on Halloween night she had been in a rather cuddly position during her slumber. I'd moved before she woke, trying not to make her go into complete shock because I'd figured that she would if I wasn't careful about it, but that was back in October…

"Goodnight," Massie murmured so quietly that I almost missed it.

"'Night…"

She curled up further into my chest, such a position that I was starting to doubt would ever happen in all the time spent with her. I smiled to myself, glad that it finally seemed to be working out.

**-:-**

**So, don't hate me for a such a **_**late**_** update! I started another story, plus I kept rearranging parts of this chapter. I mean, how many times can I rearrange it? Evidently, a lot…**

**Anyway, I do have another story up called **_**Guess Who's Back**_** and is yet another Clique. It's my own twist on a somewhat familiar plot. **

**I will be bouncing back and forth between the two, whether it happens that I put myself on a schedule or just go with whatever strikes my note at that time. Bear with me please. **

**Anyway, I will stop boring you with my rants.**

**Review? Peace. nVm**

**SDOW**


	13. Chapter13: Can You Say Pyschotic?

**For this chapter, remember that it is not Plovert it is Abeley. And also, forget the relation that Layne is supposed to have with him. Layne is Massie's aunt and older than Chris in this story. (:**

**One last thing, please excuse the fact that I am winging this chapter because I only have a slight inkling of what they do. **

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Monday, December 26  
>7:35a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

Groggily, I opened my eyes as my iPhone continued to buzz like it was having a seizure on the nightstand. Still half-asleep, not to mention partially stuck in Landon's arms, I reached over and picked it up.

"Hello?" I said quietly.

"Massie Block?"

I sat up carefully, gently moving his arm to the bed. "Yeah?"

"This is Detective Worthington. I hate to call you this early, but we need to make sure you're available to be down at the station by eleven-thirty," the Worthington guy proclaimed.

"Why?" My tired mind was still starting to function.

"Well, we've finally found who attacked you back on September 16th. They even made a confession, although we're still looking into it."

My brain finally went into overdrive. "Excuse me?"

He chuckled lightly. "Just be here by eleven-thirty and we'll explain everything."

"Uh, alright, see you then, I guess…"

"Have a good day."

"You too." I hung up the phone and stared at it.

_What. The. Hell? So, now that I finally forget about it they finally decide to get the work done? That was just… lovely. Was my life ever going to settle down for more than ninety-six hours?_

"Babe, why are you awake?" Landon asked quietly, his voice unusually low and deep. Babe? That was a new one.

"Just got a phone call," I shrugged, setting the phone back on the table.

"Who calls at eight in the morning?" he mumbled. He was still clearly half-asleep.

"Detective Worthington apparently," I replied quietly. Around the room, there were still three pairs of light snores and breathing.

"Detective?"

"I'll explain later. Just go back to sleep, I'll be back in a little bit," I said quietly, standing up. He didn't stand up, but he was watching me with confusion and curiosity scribbled all over his face.

I just shook my head and waved slightly before stepping into my boots and walking out the door in search of some decent coffee.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Monday, December 26  
>8:05a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

Yes, I was still tired, and you could tell that she was too, although she didn't show it. Massie had just left the dorm, most likely in pursuit of getting coffee so she could stay awake. Everyone else around me was asleep.

I was bound and determined to figure something out. The look on her face made it clear that she was upset, but probably was still going over it in her own mind. Why would a detective be calling her?

I sighed and closed my eyes, hoping to fall asleep. Yeah, that didn't work out so well. With a slight grumble, I switched onto my back and stared at the ceiling. It was a lot difficult than I imagined, staring at the ceiling. My mind kept attempting to wander off, but I was trying to focus on the textured pattern.

At least in worked. Some odd amount of minutes later, my natural senses took in and I fell back asleep.

**-:-**

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Police Station<br>Monday, December 26  
>11:30a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

It was hard, avoiding the questions. Everybody was curious about where I was going that was off campus, before noon, and the day after Christmas.

But here I was, sitting in a chair in a small office with Detective Worthington at his desk. Waiting mainly, that's what I was doing; waiting for whatever I was about to learn; waiting for the truth to hit me; waiting to see my own reaction.

"Hello, Miss Block," he greeted, setting down a mug he'd been drinking from.

"Hi, Detective Worthington," I replied awkwardly.

"Well, you already know why you're here. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your view point, the actual attacker isn't allowed to be around you, so you'll just be listening to a tape," he explained. I breathed a silent sigh of relief, not wanting to have to face whoever it was. "Do you have any questions before we start it?"

"Well, I have one. Who is it?" I asked. I really didn't want to have to wait for a tape.

At his response, I cringed and suddenly felt uneasy. "Chris Abeley."

"Oh."

Without further ado, he hit play on the recorder and Chris Abeley's twisted voice came out.

"_You want to know what happened? It's called drugs, stupidity, obsession, and some sick feeling of nonexistent love," he spat. _

"_I am, or was, a student at the university that Massie goes to. Right now, I am flat out admitting to you that I do have a twisted abyss of a mind. But she fascinated me. She has fascinated me since we met, three, maybe four years ago. _

"_Yes, I was watching her. People like you might prefer to use the term stalking. Like I said, she was an interesting person, quite the opposite of an eye-sore. I'm the jealous type, hard to see, right?" He let out a chortle filled with the dark, malicious personality. "I don't like that Landon guy. He isn't right for her, yet she just kept hanging out with him. I had to do something didn't I?" _

_There was a pause, as if he was contemplating telling the next part. In the background, there was a small click, a scribbling sound like someone was writing it all down._

"_Go on," whoever was taping it urged._

"_Did I mention that I have a drug issue? I really should've… Anyway, I was really upset one day, so I did what any addict does. I got high. Some people, most people, do stupid things or they act crazy, or maybe get violent. I suppose it depends on your personality. _

"_I was angrier, so I took the opportunity I had. She was alone outside, what would else could I have done? I hit her as hard as I could, although I don't remember what I used, and left her unconscious. On the upside, I got a pair of diamond earrings and some other valuable items out of it._

"_Obviously, I'm here, so you caught me and I suppose I feel guilty, but it wouldn't have been so bad if she died. I don't really give a shit about anything anymore. Is this over?"_

And the tape went blank. I was stunned, if not hurt, angry, disturbed, distraught, and so on. Seriously, what was with all my exes making appearances in my life? Detective Worthington was silent, his hands folded, waiting for me to say something.

"I know him," I muttered bluntly.

"How do you know him?"

"Four years ago, we dated."

"Did something happen while you dated that could have anything to do with this?" he asked.

"Like he said, he was obsessive, and possessive. Not to mention he was constantly trying to pressure me to do… things. I broke up with him, but was kind of, you could say stalked, by him. He always said he loved me, and he would change. I couldn't stand it. Just when I was at my breaking point, he disappeared; I haven't seen or heard from him since, until September anyway."

"I see, well since you wanted to press chargers, you'll need to have all the proper steps taken. I won't be helping a whole lot with that. I am very sorry for all that has happened to you, but I do need to get this in. Thank you."

"Actually, thank you. I should probably go anyway; I'm expected to be back soon. You have a good day," I answered, putting on a neutral façade, although I was on the verge of being torn apart on the inside.

"You do the same, Miss Block." We shook hands and he escorted me into the lobby-like place and I left. Simple as that.

The drive back to the university consisted of the noisiest silence I'd ever experienced. My thoughts were in a frenzy. And again, maybe it was just hormones, but I had a feeling at least one tear would be shed. Most people knew that I hated to cry, but it can't always be stopped, although that would be nice.

I pulled into my usual parking spot, climbing out and locking the car just like usual. At one point, I was tempted to cuss out an inanimate object, but that might have seemed odd to any passerby's.

And yes, I kind of wanted to talk about it. But the only people who knew were my mom, Kendra and Landon. Not even Alicia knew, and we were easily the closest girls. Olivia and Kristen were just as close, but the four of us were paired off by dorm and it just happened.

I strode back to my dorm room and unlocked the door, slipping inside. Somewhat surprisingly, I was facing a her. You know her as Alicia.

"What's going on?" Alicia demanded, instantly reading me like an open book before I could even blink.

"What do you mean?" I asked as innocently as possible, plopping down into my computer chair.

"Where'd you go?"

"The police station."

"Why?"

"To talk to Detective Worthington. It was Chris Abeley by the way," I said as calmly as I could possibly muster.

"Who did what?"

"Remember September? That was him."

"Oh my God…" Alicia trailed off, I guess she'd forgotten about it too.

"They're going to call me with further information for the charges and stuff later so, that's about it." _Just remain calm._

Thankfully she didn't as questions. "Oh, by the way, Landon told me to tell you to go over to his dorm so he could talk to you about whatever this was because he was worried," Alicia informed me with one of those cheeky grins.

"Well then, I guess I have somewhere to be." I shook my head and stood back up, this time ready to go face the person who would probably make me spill _everything._

The weirdest part? He didn't even know he did it, but he could still look at me and it just made you want to tell him. Then again, that could have been something else, but still. Either way, just by Landon looking at me, it was like he wanted me to tell him, but would understand if I didn't, making it a little easier.

I exited my own dorm room and walked quite slowly to the other dorms. In my head, I was debating what to actually say. I mean _"Hey, guess what? My ex is even more of an obsessed creeper than I thought. Oh, and how was your morning?"_ wasn't exactly my first choice.

I went up and was about to knock on the door when it opened as if on cue.

"I could hear you," Landon shrugged.

"Oh… Alicia said I was supposed to come and see you?"

He stepped backwards and let me pass into the room.

"I'm just… curious as to why you refused to tell any of us where you were going. Even though I have a feeling that the one detective guy is involved," he explained.

Like usual, he sat down on the bed and I sat on his computer chair. If we were ever just talking, that was the usual position.

I felt the sadness bubbling again at the mention of it and bit my lip. "Yeah, he let me listen to the recording. I know who, uh, attacked me in September now." I returned my teeth to the position on my lower lip.

"Oh?"

Word choice, remember to be careful about word choice. "It was just this… guy." _You are an idiot. _

"Well, that narrows it down quite a bit."

"It was my kind of… obsessed ex-boyfriend," I replied quietly.

"_What_ did you just say?" Well, Landon wasn't happy.

So I told him everything. He was watching me intently, determined to hear all of it. I was surprised at how upset I really was, thinking about it again. It bothered me a lot that one of my exes was that heartless and equally disturbing.

"Are you okay?" he asked, noticing the upset expression I was wearing.

"Honestly? Sort of. It just kind of bothers me…" I trailed off.

"Come here," he ordered softly.

"Why?"

"Just come here."

I stood up and walked the whole (barely) two foot distance and sat down lightly on the bed beside him. It was weird between us. We'd technically been a couple for four days, yet knew each other like a couple who'd been together for almost a year. Yet, we'd only actually known one another for just over three months. We were one of the luckier pairs.

He pulled me into a hug and we just sat there together; savoring the quiet, embracing the truth, and (in my case) letting go and moving on.

**-:-**

**Yeah, I know, still kind of uneventful, and I did in fact notice the decrease of drama factors. –Sigh- **

**But I have a question for a new idea that just happens to involve the hospital… again. Just one question: if I were to use this idea, who should be hurt- Landon or Massie?**

**Live by the Triple (or recently and sometimes quadruple) L rules.**

**SDOW**


	14. Chapter14: The Conversation

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Wednesday, December 28  
>1:23p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Massie, I have a serious question," Alicia stated. Thankfully, it wasn't snowing outside; we were still just staying inside though.

"No need to announce it," I answered, absentmindedly tapping the cap of my pen against my lip.

"I'm just curious, but are you still completely against love?" she asked.

My hand froze. Was I still? I responded, "Not completely, I believe it's possible for some; and that it's possible to _really_ like someone, but not necessarily love."

"Hmm, interesting."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

"Alicia."

"Hey, you'll figure it out eventually," she shrugged.

"Are you implying that I'm falling in love?" I inquired, guessing that that's where she was going with it.

"I never said that. But I guess I did imply it…" She smirked at me before turning back to the paperback novel in her hands.

"I doubt it," I said quietly enough that she couldn't hear. But it wasn't entirely true. Although it made me sigh (and occasionally grumble) just to think about it, I realized that it was very possible that I'd been wrong all along. I shook the thoughts from my head and turned back to the outline I was working on.

For a while it was quiet again, and I was kind of afraid of what Alicia might be thinking if her mind was still on the subject. I was still thinking on my own, my mind bouncing back and forth between the story Landon had told me about the 4th of July and what I was feeling.

It basically was a silent storm inside my head. _Well, you told yourself you felt sparks, and you always get that chill. - Wait, did he say that it was a Lady Gaga poster? - I mean, is it even possible; or are you getting ahead of yourself? – It was a beach, I think… - It's impossible that you're falling for him, you don't believe in love; remember that? – Was that girl's name Kori or Kari? I think it was Kori. __**(A/N: I hope that wasn't too confusing.)**_

"Massie, are you even listening to me?" Alicia giggled. I snapped out of it and looked at her.

"Um, sure?"

"Are you asking me or telling me?"

"I'm asking you," I reported.

"Well then, you weren't listening. But knowing you, you were having a debate in your head," she guessed.

"Psh, no."

Alicia shook her head and dropped the subject, forgetting to tell me what she wanted to in the first place.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Wednesday, December 28****  
><strong>**2:05p.m.**

**LC;**

I sat at my desk, pulling some scenes back and forth to finish up one of my short films before I could start the latest one.

"So, are you still stuck on that whole 'derogatory statement' thing?" Derrick asked, throwing a baseball at the ceiling and catching it before it whacked him in the face.

"What are you talking about?" I countered, pulling scene 7 up to where scene 5 was.

"You said love was a derogatory statement; or at least you said something like that didn't you? I don't know, either way, do you believe in it now or not?"

"I've only been with her technically for six days."

"And your point is? You were practically drooling for the last three months anyway. Besides, you didn't answer my question."

"I don't know, I suppose it's possible. But sometimes you think its love and it turns out to just be a façade." I lifted one shoulder and turned to face him.

"Well, the two of you don't seem like the type to fake anything," Derrick pointed out; flicking the ball with his wrist into the air and letting it drop on the floor.

He was quiet for a moment while I dragged another scene into the mix. "Just… be careful."

"Be careful?"

"Yep. Remember, we've seen her go through this once already, you don't exactly want six angry people after you, do you?" he inquired.

"Oh, I see where you're going. And yes, I'll try, but I can promise you that I'm not going to hurt her," I stated.

"Trust me, it's better if you don't. If you're going to drop her, do it now or you might end up hating yourself in the process."

His phone buzzed and he picked it up, answering with a goofy grin as he started an animated conversation with Kristen. I looked at him for a moment. Was I missing something?

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Common Room<br>Thursday, December 29  
>11:00a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I was curled up in one of the arm chairs, half-paying attention while flipping through an old, well-used book.

"What are you reading?" Kristen asked, sitting down on the chair beside mine.

I flipped the book over to look at the cover. "Apparently, _The Scarlet Letter_."

"You're always rereading those classics," she sighed, twirling a lock of dirty blonde hair around her index finger.

"Some of them are good," I defended.

"Yeah, yeah, that's not why I'm here."

"Oh boy… Did Alicia send you?"

"No. Should she have?"

"I was just wondering," I shrugged, turning the crinkled page.

"Anyway, I was wondering if you had any ideas for New Year's," Kristen informed.

"Not really. We could always drive a little bit out to find some fireworks and stuff though."

"Fireworks on our own; do you honestly trust Derrick, Landon, Josh and Chris to do that? You know they wouldn't let us do it," she noted.

"I'm talking about one of the firework shows," I chuckled as she breathed a sigh of relief. "But no, I don't really trust the guys with that… We might get blown up if we do."

Kristen paused. "Or worse…"

"Really, what could be worse than getting blown up?"

"Well, if they attached us to a firework and sent us into the air to explode, that could be worse."

"Uh, Kristen? Maybe we should stop talking about this. Not only did we just get way sidetracked, but eh, we have two sets of ears trained on our conversation."

Kristen turned her head in the direction that I was looking to find one blonde male and one black-headed male watching us with raised eyebrows.

"Oh… Hi Derrick, Landon," Kristen greeted. In a whisper she added, "And this is what we get for having the boyfriends that are roommates…"

"You started it," I answered innocently, tucking my book into my purse and standing up. She followed suit, dusting off her DKNY Soho jeans.

"Thanks for having _so_ much faith in us," Derrick griped teasingly.

"Just for that we might want to strap you to that firework," Landon added.

"You two are evil," I sighed and hooked my bag over one shoulder. Kristen and I started to walk out in the opposite direction, but were easily caught up with and followed.

"Yet, you know that you love it," Derrick informed us.

"I never got that memo," I muttered, smiling inwardly but attempting to look annoyed on the outside.

"Oh, but I sent it to you!" He feigned shock.

I rolled my eyes and all four of us entered the dining hall from the outside the double doors. The other four people were already seated. We grabbed our food and plopped down as usual.

For some reason, that whole day had just been kind of quick and humorous. I credited the New Year that was approaching, as everyone was excited and joyous.

"Hey," Olivia called out in her usual bubbly manner.

The normal chatter ensued: talk about break almost ending, slight gossip, exams, assignments, and such. Sometimes, it felt like we were still in high school.

"You're awfully quiet all of a sudden," Landon noted, glancing over at me to study my expression.

I shrugged. "I don't have much to say."

His glance turned into a gaze. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, why?" Now I was confused. Sure, I was quiet, which was only slightly unusual, but we all have our moments.

"Just wondering…" He turned back to whatever it was that he was eating for lunch, leaving me to dwell on my thoughts. Truthfully, I was mainly quiet because I couldn't look at Landon without thinking about my conversation with Alicia.

I stuck a piece of the lettuce from my salad into my mouth and chewed thoughtfully. Frankly, I wouldn't be very surprised if I ended up spacing again.

"You know, I here there's going to be a huge party downtown on New Year's, we could always go to that," Josh suggested.

"I like it," Chris agreed.

"I guess it can't be too bad," Alicia sighed.

I wasn't thinking much about it, just trying to keep my thoughts from switching to the same thing over and over again. A gust of cold air brushed through the room when someone opened and closed the door.

Landon's hand somehow ended up on my knee under the table, sending the newly familiar warmth through my veins. Even through my jeans, it still happened.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked again.

"I'm just in a thoughtful mood, nothing big," I responded.

Although he didn't seem entirely convinced, Landon still dropped the subject and settled for just looking over at me every so often.

**-(0)- **

**11:00p.m.**

I laid back in my bed, still unable to sleep as my thoughts swirled around in my head. It was nearly pitch black in the room, but I'd been looking at the dark long enough to make out some shapes and shadows.

Still, I didn't know why I was so stuck on the conversation. In the very back of my mind where I just couldn't quite reach, it was there. But for the time being, I was still stuck wondering exactly what "it" was. I knew in my gut that it would take something pretty big to happen if I wanted to truly find out.

The New Year was coming up; maybe that's what it was. Maybe something was going on New Year's that would change everything. My curiosity had been woken up because that little bit was still gnawing at the back of my mind.

The darkness in the room seemed to get even darker as my thoughts still managed to keep my awake. In short, I was unnaturally tired yet restless.

Across the room, Alicia's usual soft breathing noises were absent, due to the fact that she'd gone and spent the night with Chris. So, I was alone and allowed to focus way too much on something I wasn't sure about in the quiet, dark room.

Eventually, after what could have been five minutes or an hour, my eyelids fluttered closed. My mind had finally decided to rest.

**-:-**

**Gah, short chapter! Yet a lot of them have been these days. I know the past few chapters have been kind of… blah, but it's because I'm having it all lead up to my newest dramatic event. And yes, I am excited about it because this is a big contribution to the base of the story. **

**I'm still wondering though, Landon or Massie? If nobody votes I'll just go with my original choice. **

**And finally school is out, so I should be able to update A LOT more. Happy Summer! (:**

**Triple L! **

**-SDOW**


	15. Chapter15: And I Just Realized Something

**And New Year's is here… Enjoy.**

…

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Downtown<br>Saturday, December 31  
>10:45p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Are you having fun?" Landon asked, chuckling after I'd been convinced to skip down a whole block in the snow with Olivia.

"If you're talking about my skipping, then no; I almost fell. Twice," I responded, shaking a few stray snowflakes from my hair.

"Well, at least you didn't make it obvious by screeching or something." He put one arm up around my shoulders.

"Oh, like you would have?" I inquired innocently, earning myself a playful glare.

All eight of us had just finished walking (and occasionally skipping) down a few blocks to where we were all going to celebrate the New Year. Olivia and Josh had strayed to a different side of the room, probably to get to an area with more dancers. Kristen and Derrick had moved too, but probably just to make out in a corner; those two were the worst with PDA. Alicia and Chris (Plovert) were a few feet away just talking like Landon and I were.

"You excited about the New Year?" he asked, taking a drink of the Coke he had in his hand.

"A little, pretty surprised that we've made it this far in college without any major regrets. How about you?"

"Same thing, although I'm a little worried what you might mean by regrets."

I giggled. "It's not you, so don't worry."

"Oh, alright, I was just making sure. One of those reasons being that they say on New Year's, if you want to be with someone that year, than you kiss them at midnight," he added the last part rather quietly.

"Doubting me again, Mr. Crane?" I raised an eyebrow and took my head off of his shoulder so that I could face him.

"I am inclined to deny that, although it may be minimally true," he confessed, that quiet tone still set in his deep voice.

"Hmm, well keep those thoughts out of your head, alright?" I encouraged, setting my head back down on his shoulder.

"If it keeps you pleased."

What I refused to say was that in my gut I knew something a lot bigger was going to happen than a simple kiss that night, whether it was good or bad.

**-(0)- **

**11:05p.m.**

**LC;**

The night was lively, filled with music and those sloppy and overly joyous grins. I was feeling immensely pleased myself, because at the moment, I had one arm draped around an amazing girl (whom I still wondering how I managed to catch) and her light head gently resting on my shoulder.

It was at that moment that I fully realized our height difference. I was six foot, two inches, yet she appeared to only be around five foot, six inches, possibly seven. I was tempted to ask, but decided against it, not wanting to offend her.

"Fifty minutes," she muttered, raising a glass of Dr. Pepper to her unusually pink lips. It clearly was not lipstick or something girly like that. In fact, it was probably my new mind wave of thinking like a hormone-crazed, fifteen-year-old girl.

Like usual, I was tempted to just grab her, but that probably wouldn't get me very far. I'd quickly learned that Massie was not big on public affection when she was surprised. It was another story if she knew what was going on.

"You're just anticipating the kiss," I teased.

She turned her head rather sharply to face me. "I am not," she huffed defensively.

"Oh, that's too bad, cause I am," I responded. My arm was already back at my side by this point, so I was able to lean back against the counter we were standing by and prop up on elbow.

"That's good for you, but I never said I would kiss you." _Of course, she can throw me for a loop, but it can't go vice-versa? _

"But, I thought… And our earlier conversation…" I was pretty close to rambling when she stuck one finger against my lips to shut me up. The simple touch sent a familiar tingle up and down my spine.

"Calm down, tonight's supposed to be fun and you keep worrying," Massie instructed, pulling her hand back down.

"How are you two doing?" Olivia asked, coming up with an easily bemused Josh.

"Just wonderful," Massie answered, one of those suggestive smirks creeping onto her mouth.

"Figures," Josh scoffed.

"I'm not opposed," I piped in, mainly out of nowhere.

"Forty minutes…"

"You guys are weird." Olivia shook her head and took Josh somewhere back out onto the dance floor.

Massie giggled, looking somewhat accomplished and took a sly glance over at me. Flickering inside those amber orbs was the usual small hint of sarcastic humor, the bright excitement, and some kind of indescribable happiness.

Out on the dance floor, several other college couples were busy grinding on each other, and I was thankful that Massie didn't want to head into the middle of it at the time. It would certainly be interesting on my part; I couldn't help but be curious if she was one of the grinding-dancer types at times like this. Yet at the same time, I didn't want to head into the flash mob of sweaty and overexcited freshmen; and I had a feeling that I was not alone.

And then I made the mistake of looking at her again. Massie's eyes were shining again, a small smile was playing on her lips, her casual stance put her in a position where I could easily lean over a foot or so and kiss her, and it was just too much. My mind went nearly blank and the smile on her face only widened when she got a look at my expression.

"I love this song, don't you?" she inquired, pulling me out of the trance.

I listened to the loud music for a few seconds. _So, she's a fan of _ 3Oh!3? _That's the one music type I didn't know about_, I thought to myself. "It's pretty good. You never told me that you liked them though."

"There are still quite a few things you don't know," she taunted playfully.

"I know you're newest favorite color. Not long ago you told me that the color white has really grown on you and that black is technically not a color."

"And why did I say that?"

With a slight grin, I responded, "You said that white was technically all of the colors of the rainbow, which makes it more than just one color and not so dull as some see it. You then went on to inform me that black is an absence of any color or light, so, and I quote, 'is therefore not a color at all'."

"You do listen," she answered, another one of those smiles tugging at the corners of her mouth. She stole a glance at the clock; the smile grew.

For a while we were both quiet, listening to the music and enjoying each other's company. It really was that easy, and she seemed overall relaxed. I was still a little steamed about this whole Chris Abeley situation, although Massie refused to let me hunt him down, but I did my best to forget it.

"Ten minutes," Massie announced around fifteen minutes later. I glanced at the clock and grinned, she wasn't kidding.

The next nine minutes were an excited blur. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two. And then finally one made its appearance. Seconds were counted down, and once it got to ten seconds, Massie and I both joined in the shouting.

"Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two…!" But on the number one I was pulled into what was quite possibly the best kiss of my nineteen years. Of course, in about a month it would be twenty years.

My mind went blank for the second time that night, the only thought was of pulling Massie impossibly closer, which was quite a feat considering our position.

It was only when both of our lungs were about to set on fire when we pulled apart, our breathing pleased but irregular.

"I told you not to worry," she giggled.

"I'm going to have trouble worrying for a while," I responded. Again, the girly feelings were returning, and my heart might as well have taken off out of my chest. I felt like a female, and that bothered me, yet I knew that I was allowed to feel that way a little in some situations.

After a few more minutes of simply staring at one another, she spoke up. "I have to run and get something out of the car; I'll be right back, okay?" Massie informed me.

"As long as you hurry. And for God's sake be careful, there is ice out there," I teased.

"I'll do my best," she giggled again and turned, around gently brushing my hand with her fingertips while she walked away.

The next sixty seconds of my life were quite possibly the worst.

Massie left the room and stepped into the night. Derrick was just making his way over to me, Kristen slowly following behind. He opened his mouth to speak when both of us were silenced.

One of the most agonizing screams I'd ever heard pierced the air before the music was the only noise left. Before I could be stopped, I bounded out of the lounge into the night. It happened all too fast.

I got out there to find a car stopped in the center of the road, Massie in front of it, sprawled on the ground, unconscious. Rushing over to her side, I skidded on my shoes to a stop and crouched down.

Fear was tearing through my insides when I checked her pulse out of habit and instruction. It was slower than it should've been, and her breathing was seemingly shallower.

I was frozen, my cell phone was still back on the counter. The only thing I could think to shout was, "Somebody call 911!" before I went into a very panicky mode.

**-(0)-**

**12:05a.m.**

**MB;**

I walked out into the night, unable to control the huge grin on my face. I'd just had the single best kiss of my life ever, not ten minutes ago.

I looked both ways in that instructed habit, and saw no cars. Boy, I was sure wrong about that one.

Midway through crossing the street, out of nowhere, a car was coming straight at me. My eyes widened in fear and I did what a normal person would do, screamed at the top of my lungs.

There was a white hot pain before I was shoved down into a dizzying and agonizing darkness.

**(A/N: For the first time ever, I'm using a less common character's POV so you can see how Landon is reacting in other people's minds, because obviously Massie can't tell about it...)**

**-(0)-**

**12:07a.m.**

**DH;**

I rushed out after Landon, Kristen on my heels. I didn't forget, however, to grab Landon's Droid for him so it wouldn't get stolen. Whether that was important or not, I wasn't thinking about.

The scene outside was not pretty. There was of course the car. And then there was a driver who had just shoved a phone back into his pocket and was frantically rambling and looking quite scared himself. Further off, by a few feet, Landon was crouched over a human form. Upon further looking, I realized that it was Massie who was out on the street and bounded over to her other side.

Now I was scared too. Massie had seemed to be suddenly prone to accidents like this during our freshmen year. First the attacking in September, and then she gets hit by a car. Landon looked up at me and I could only make out one emotion: unleashed, unintelligible, disturbingly surreal, and utterly horrifying terror.

That was the first time I'd ever seen my male roommate look like he was about to break down and cry, but his eyes stayed wide and frightened. He didn't look like a young adult; he looked like a kid who just needed to be reassured that everything would be okay. But I couldn't say that because we didn't know, and I didn't want to be screamed at for lying.

"This can't be happening!" Kristen screeched, finally reaching the two of us.

"Ten minutes ago we were joking and sharing one of those unforgettable kisses, and right now I just realized something," Landon muttered.

Kristen and I both looked at him, curious as to what he was about to say. He was quiet for another moment, possibly debating in his head if he should even say it out loud.

He looked at Massie again, one hand brushing tenderly against her cheek.

"What's going on?" Kristen asked softly, hoping that she could get him to say it.

He looked at both of us, that same horror was still prancing in his eyes, yet there was something new in there too. Even I, Derrick Harrington, could tell what it was without explanation. Landon Crane had obviously fallen into undeniable, unconditional love with one of my best friends, Massie Block.

**-:-**

**I knew this chapter wouldn't be too hard to write. So, their little secret is out, well at least Landon's is. I'm still choosing a different method to go about Massie…**

**Anyway, I will update soon, give me around 24 hours. And even though this might seem like it's getting closer to the end, it's kind of not, I want this to go further than twenty-five chapters, so stay tune.**

**Enough of my rambling.**

**Thanks to all my reviewers!**

**-insert peace sign here- **

**-SDOW**


	16. Chapter16: You're Making Me Dizzy

**The whole love thing was inspired by the saying "You never know what you have until you lose it. Or until you almost lose it." Massie isn't dead! Told you it wouldn't take long. (: Review after? And no, I am not a terrible person; she only has minor stuff, probably less than any factual accident. Oh well, I don't own the Clique, but either way it **_**is **_**fiction. Sorry, you can't sue me, although that would be kind of funny… Sorry, no more rambles. **

**Enjoy…**

**-:-**

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Sunday, January 1  
>12:55a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

It all happened in a blur. One second the realization hit me: I was in love with Massie freaking Block. It was unintentional, possibly irrational- that wasn't what I expected, nor what should've happened, but I couldn't fight it. So, I guess I'd just have to keep my mouth shut for a while.

The next instant, the ambulance finally arrived and took her to Mercy Hospital, where we were currently sitting. We included: Derrick, Kristen, Alicia, Chris, Josh, Olivia, and of course, me. Massie was in surgery, being checked out to find out what injuries and crap she had.

I was sitting on one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs, literally on the edge, with my head in my hands. Everyone was nervous. I mean, sure, accident rates were always higher on holidays; but why her? Out of all people, she was the one that had to get hit. And to make it even more dandy, the driver only suffered a minor cut on the forehead from slamming his head on the steering wheel when the car lurched to a stop.

"How are you holding up?" Derrick asked, plopping back down on the chair beside me with some _black _coffee in hand.

"Just wonderful," I replied sarcastically.

"Dude, it was just a question, calm down," he muttered.

I fought the urge to roll my eyes, a habit I'd picked up from Massie when she got annoyed. Luckily, it wasn't usually used towards me…

"Sorry, it's just kind of touchy…" I sighed and pulled one hand through my dark hair.

That certainly wasn't a lie. On the outside, I looked mildly scared, disturbed, angry, and possibly annoyed. On the inside, I was freaking out to the full extent. Would she even be okay?

I hated hospitals. Everything was impeccably sterile and _white._ White and pastels, that's about all you got. The occasional black plastic on a chair or something was your darkest color. Couldn't someone design a hospital here that didn't make people even more freaked out than they already were?

And then I started freaking out even more as possibilities ran into my mind. On the worst side of things, she could have brain damage or internal bleeding or, if you're talking some MAJOR stuff, going into a coma or loss of memory. Then again, she might just have few minor injuries.

Massie was known to be built like a rock, very strong and seemingly unbreakable. Heck, it was possible that I might have a fair fighting partner if what was said about her skill was true.

"Yo, Landon!" Derrick half-shouted to get my attention. I snapped back to reality and looked to my left.

"Yes?"

"Doctor's here."

I looked up with hopeful eyes. The doctor himself looked kind of unsure of what to say to a group of concerned college freshmen.

"Well," he started, "luckily, there wasn't any major damage. She does have quite a concussion from hitting the icy street, but no evident brain damage. She'll still be in a lot of pain either way for a while because the main area that was hit was her left hip. Also, her left tibia is slightly fractured and she did twist her ankle.

"We'll have to do more tests once she wakes up, because we can't be precise when she's unconscious. But keep in mind that may not be for another day or two. She's evidently a very strong girl, but between the hit and the medication it could be a while longer than you would like."

I breathed a sigh of relief. It could be so much worse. But as far as they knew it was minor. The driver had hit the brakes quick enough to lessen impact, but the ice wasn't helping.

"When do we get to see her?" I inquired.

"Unfortunately, the only way anyone of you is going to see her is if you stay in the hospital, which I'm very sorry about. But still, we have to follow the policies, my apologies. And do remember, we don't know everything yet, so, no matter how harsh this sounds, remember that it may be worse than we see," he advised before bidding us a goodbye and hurrying off.

I just shook my head. Alright, so he basically just gave us the okay to worry ourselves sick. "That was… lovely," I sighed. Either way, no matter how little damage, Massie would also still be in extensive pain, which made me cringe.

"What kind of doctor says that?" Josh inquired sarcastically.

"Um, most of them," Alicia replied from my right side. She looked over at me and her gaze softened. Apparently, after I just happened to hear someone's conversation, they were all worried about me because I hardly spoke up and was snapping at most of them when they tried to get me to talk.

"She'll be alright," she said quietly.

"I shouldn't have let her go out to the car alone. This could've been avoided," I muttered back.

"Are you implying that this is your fault?"

"A little. I warned her to be careful on the ice, but I should've gone with…"

"Oh my, this was the driver's fault, and the ice, not yours. If I here you say something like that again, I won't hesitate to slap you," she warned.

"And you guys say Massie has a temper," I scoffed.

She gave a tight smile before turning back to Chris and leaving me to drown in my own thoughts.

Gah! Why did everything have to be so complicated? They "politely" informed me that I was just going through stages. There was anger, shock, denial, horror, and realization- not necessarily in that order. I was probably in denial at the moment. The horror had lost its edge, but it would still be a while before it was gone. And the anger and shock had both been taken care of. Even most of the realization was done.

"Are any of you staying here?" a forty-some looking, tired nurse asked, walking into the room.

"I am," I announced immediately, as expected.

"Alright, I'm sorry but the rest of you have to leave then. Feel free to come back in the morning though."

The seven of us said small goodbyes and parted ways. Derrick gave me a somewhat reassuring pat on the back before trailing behind everyone else.

"What's your relation?" the nursed inquired while we were walking down the long (and also very white) hallway.

"Boyfriend."

"Ah, I see, well if anything happens with her you can just use this button and a nurse will come. Have a good night… I guess," she muttered the last part while pointing out the different buttons on the side of the bed.

I nodded and finally took a look at Massie herself. My world may as well have come crashing down on top of me. Her normally milk-and-honey like skin was unearthly pale, there were mid-dark shadows under her eyes, and somehow in the space of an hour, her normally glossy hair was in a fit of minor tangles. There were a few IV's, that kind of thing as well. She just looked so vulnerable and defenseless that it scared the hell out of me. What had happened to the girl I was kissing two hours ago?

With dampened spirits, and increasing worry, I slumped down into yet another one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs and tried not to look at her very often.

I kept turning in the hard chair, trying to find a somewhat comfortable position so I could at least rest my eyes. Sleep was going to be a challenge, especially when it was possible that I would break down at any moment like the newfound emotional side was warning.

I caught sight of her again and felt the terrorized hitch in my breathing. The only thing that kept me from going into a full on, bouncing-off-the-walls, panic mode was the occasional murmur that she'd release in her sleep. Evidently, the horrifying mix of intense pain, morphine, and confusing memories made one talk in their sleep.

I twisted again and sighed. Of course, I was tired, but very pent up, and not to mention that fact that I was still vexed.

Eventually, my eyes closed and I was pushed into a fitful and rather terrible sleep.

**(a/n: Sorry, got to go for more unfamiliar POV just so you can see him in the eyes of another. It's not too terrible I hope. And yeah, this hospital is a real place.)**

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Sunday, January 1  
>9:00a.m.<strong>

**AR;**

I walked into the hospital and completely skipped the greeting from the unnaturally cheery receptionist. I went to the room number that Landon had said over the phone to Derrick, knowing that she was still asleep, and slightly scared of what I was going to see.

Chris was at my side as we stepped into the room. Landon was sitting on one of the chairs, looking disturbed and tired. My eyes moved to Massie. She was laying completely still, the normal stuff hooked up to her. My best girl-friend was just lying there helplessly, her hair somehow tangled, her eyes with grey-ish circles, her skin pale, and her chest rising slowly, the only indication that she was even alive. Well, I guess the heart monitor was a giveaway too, but still.

"Hey," I said quietly. He looked up at me and sighed, his teal eyes briefly flickering to Massie's form.

"Hi," Chris offered. My boyfriend always knew just how to break the tension… or not.

"They say brain function is pretty normal," Landon added with a sigh.

We all knew it now, that he'd fallen hard. It had been a long time coming. I sat down on the chair on the other side of the bed. Chris followed me and stood behind the chair. One of Landon's arm was up over the side of the bed, his thumb gently stroking Massie's. You could literally see the pain in the poor guy's eyes.

"Second time that she's gotten hurt. Why her?" I murmured.

"We know that she can get through it," Chris soothed.

Landon opened his mouth, probably to announce another cynical thought, but thought twice about it and snapped his mouth closed when I raised my eyebrows. Alright, my attitude was worse than Massie's by far.

A few others came into the room, all being shocked by her appearance. Derrick and Josh both looked sad not only because of Massie, but because of one of their newest guy friends looked heartbroken. Kristen looked like she was about to faint. And Olivia flat-out started to bawl, but regained control after a few minutes.

The day passed at an undesirably slow pace, with no sign of Massie waking up yet. Although there was an occasional whimper, murmur, and once she even released a small giggle. Well, just another person that didn't handle morphine well.

At night, we all, except for Landon, left again. I sat silently in the car while Chris drove the two of us back to the university. School was going to start in a week, on the ninth.

It was going to be another long night.

**-(0)- **

**11:00p.m.**

**LC;**

Day faded into night, where I would spend another spell of time in the lovely hospital chair. The only time I'd even left Massie's side was to eat and use the bathroom. And a few times for phone calls…

It was so hard to look at her, and I so badly just wanted her to wake up. At one point, even though it pained me, I couldn't stop staring at her. She'd lost some blood from a gash in her leg that was covered by a walking boot or something to keep it in place, even though it wasn't broken. Her hand was around room temperature only, warmer after I'd hold it for a while.

And hold it I did. Most of the time that I was in the chair, then one hand was resting on top of hers, cradling it gently.

The pastel room was dark finally, a little bit of light seeping in from the hallway, but that was about it.

I was restless though. At one point, sometime around midnight or one, I got up and started pacing back and forth across the room, working extra hard to keep my eyes trained on the floor. If I looked at her, the nauseating feeling my stomach would come back, as I was still disturbed by it all.

My Droid buzzed, probably Alicia or Derrick, the ones who were closest other than me.

**Derrick: Can't sleep. How is she?**

**Landon: Still the same. **

**Derrick: Let us know if something happens. **

**Landon: As always.**

I put the phone away. I'd been persuaded to leave the hospital once, only to go and shower and then change into a T-shirt, basketball shorts, and a sweatshirt.

I was still pacing as the clock pushed up to two in the morning. Of course, my mind was telling me to go asleep, but my body wasn't having it. Back and forth across the room, I just kept going repeatedly.

"Can you please sit down? You're making me dizzy," Massie's soft voice moaned.

I froze and my head switched around to see her watching me with half-open eyes.

**-:-**

**Mwah ha ha ha! I'll update soon, unless I decide to just leave it here for a week. Hmm…**

**Smiles**

**-SDOW**


	17. Chapter17: Compelling Thoughts

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Monday, January 2  
>2:45a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I opened my eyes and was very confused. For one thing, it took me about five minutes just to figure out that I was in a hospital room. The whole white thing was a tip off. Hospital designers must be color blind.

Another thing I was suddenly _very_ aware of was the pain coursing through my body. My whole left side was way worse, although my chest and my right side hurt too. My back was kind of midway on the pain scale. I had no idea whatsoever what had happened to me, but I felt like I'd been hit by a bus. And my head was pounding.

I looked at the other person in the room. He (I figured it was probably Landon) was pacing back and forth continually. Not that I wasn't already dizzy, but it was getting worse.

I closed my eyes to try and get it gone, but that didn't work. "Can you please sit down? Your make me dizzy," I pleaded, but it came out more like I was groaning from my distorted voice.

He froze and I took that as a sign that I could open my eyes again. Now that he was facing me, I could tell that it definitely was Landon.

He muttered something that sounded like it was along the lines of thanking God, but I couldn't be sure.

Landon came over to the side of the bed, and what bothered me the most was that I couldn't move. Any time I flinched, it would start to hurt worse. So for the time being, I was stuck just moving my head slowly.

"You've been out for over twenty-four hours," he replied quietly.

"Really?" Oh wow…. What happened? And then it started coming back. New Year's, getting something out of the car, crossing the street, the car, the screech of the tires, screaming involuntarily, pain, silence, and then darkness to finish it all off.

He nodded, attempting to look calm, but in his eyes you could see an immense amount of worry.

"Then how is it possible that I'm still tired?" I sighed, knowing that within a few minutes I'd probably fall back asleep.

At that moment, a nurse walked in to take over the conversation.

"You're going to feel tired for the next day or so before we switch you onto some different medication. For now, you're just going to feel sore pretty much everywhere until it kicks in. The best thing you can do is try not to move," she advised, switching out one of the IV bags. "But, it is terrific that you're awake. We weren't expecting it for another twelve hours or so. Try and rest." With those final words, she gave me a tired smile and left the room.

"Thank you," I said once she'd left the room.

"Hmm?" Landon was on the chair at that point, but looked up from his phone to look at me.

"For being here."

He smiled. "Anytime."

"'Night, I guess."

"Goodnight, Mass." But I was already asleep.

**-(0)-**

**3:00a.m.**

**LC;**

**Landon: She was just awake a few minutes ago. Med-bag switched and she fell back asleep.**

**Derrick: Good to know. See you in the morning.**

I put the phone down and for the first time, despite the uncomfortable chair, was able to fall into a slightly less restless sleep.

**-(0)-**

**8:00a.m.**

It was amazing how I still managed to be awake after only five hours of sleep. Well, technically four and a half because of that stupid chair. Alicia was sitting in the other chair, scribbling something onto a notebook. Massie was still asleep, but everyone was reassured because we knew it was just average sleep.

"Does she remember what happened?" Alicia asked without looking up.

"I think she does, but she didn't say anything about it," I responded, rolling my shoulders.

"Is the rest of her memory okay?"

"As far as I know. She didn't have any brain trauma, Alicia."

"I was just checking," she huffed. Someone didn't get all her beauty sleep.

"Don't get mad at me."

"Fine, as long as you don't give me a reason to anyway."

I grinned; it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what she was referring to.

Massie suddenly decided to wake up. She slowly opened her eyes and released a shaky sigh. "Everything. Is. Sore," she groaned.

"Hey Mass, glad to see you awake," Alicia greeted quietly, looking up and offering her roommate and best friend a smile.

Massie turned her head to the side. "Hi Leesh." Her voice sounded worn out.

I decided to just let the two of them talk for a bit and stood up, quietly walking out of the room so Massie wouldn't notice. I walked down the hallway and into one of the bathrooms. Oh my, and she said my hair stuck in every direction before…

After actually going to the bathroom, I did my best to use my hand and flatten my hair. Although it might seem girly, I didn't want to look like a cockatoo.

Leaving the bathroom, I walked out into the waiting area. Derrick was out there, pacing slightly while in the middle of a phone conversation. Kristen was with him, but was sitting on one of the chairs, slouched down and reading some electronic book thing. Chris was clearly just letting Alicia take his time, as he'd dozed off in one of the chairs. Olivia and Josh were nowhere to be seen.

I strode across the light blue/grey-flecked linoleum over to the coffee station and dumped some of the black liquid into a paper cup. It was mornings like this when coffee was my savior.

I went over and sat down in the chair next to Kristen, taking a gulp of the hot liquid and checking my phone out of habit.

"Why aren't you in there?" she asked curiously, turning ever so slightly to face me.

"Honestly? I'm kind of afraid of what they might be talking about." I shook my head and she laughed at me. Either way, I was serious. Who knew what Massie was discussing? …Unless, just maybe, she'd fallen asleep again.

"That was an interesting phone call," Derrick replied, coming over and sinking into the chair beside Kristen, whose face had a growing smirk.

"Who'd you talk to?" I inquired.

"Block's mom. I mean seriously, I should have made you do it after I lost, but no, you had to be busy."

"Yeah well, at least she's met you more than twice in person… I think."

"Several times actually, in case you were wondering."

Kristen just raised an eyebrow at the two of us before returning to whatever she was reading. A few minutes later, Alicia walked back out and shook Chris gently awake before saying goodbye to us and leaving.

"I guess that's our cue then," Derrick announced, standing up and helping Kristen up as well. "You coming?"

"In a minute," I responded. He just shrugged and the two walked away. I settled further back into my seat and tried to sort out my thoughts.

But still, the main thought was taking over and I had to figure out what to do. All of it had been unforeseen, at least by me… At least by Massie. Of course, I'd never, not at all, not in my wildest dreams and fantasies, believed in the word 'love'. Love had always been some kind of make-believe feeling for people who didn't know what they were talking about. Then, there I was, stuck in the middle of it, finding out that it wasn't a disgusting joke, and not knowing if I should even tell the person.

I knew that Massie didn't believe it in either… not anymore. Or had her opinions changed? I couldn't ask her without it being obvious, which was another thing I did not want.

Another thing, I was probably overthinking things… _again_.

Yet another overly-cheery nurse passed by, giving me one of those polite smiles. I looked at the walls. There was a poster about smoking and lungs and whatnot, little ads and campaigns, and even a few average paintings.

Around twenty minutes passed, and I wasn't sure what I was waiting for. Perhaps for the blonde couple to leave was my reason for holding back, or maybe it was because I needed my mind to simmer down before I faced _her. _

Psh, I have no idea how much more time passed. Somewhere between ten and forty minutes before Kristen was being led out by Derrick.

He looked pointedly at me, the expression one of those you-know-she-wants-you kinds of things before they both said goodbye and disappeared. Massie had admitted that she hated the attention, so they only left, any of us only left, because we wanted to respect her wishes.

I stood up and looked distastefully at the utterly strong coffee before discreetly dumping it and throwing away the cup. With usual long strides, I walked back into Massie's room- room number 228. She looked up when I came in, still trying to keep her movements extremely limited.

The back of the bed was raised so she was in a sitting/lounging position. Most likely in that automatic and involuntary way, she smiled at me, nearly making me falter in my step. _Nearly_.

"Hey, Massiekur," I greeted softly.

"Hey." Her voice was just as soft, if not softer.

"Do you remember what happened?" It was a question that had to be asked.

Massie's face contorted into a grimace before returning to a normal expression. "A little too well."

"Sorry, I had to at least ask." I moved over directly by the side of her bed. She shrugged, looking like she was about to fall asleep again. "Hey, try and get some rest."

Massie opened her mouth to protest, but thought better of it and sighed.

"Thank you," I grinned.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she seriously lifted her arm and waved it off. I guess the painkillers were working.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead for no particular reason before retreating and sitting down on that one chair.

"Well, if you want me to sleep, can you at least do something for me?" she inquired, turning her head to look at me.

"Sure."

"Will you just talk?"

"Talk?" Of course, in my mind I was analyzing what she meant.

"Yeah, just tell me a story or something," Massie answered quietly.

"Why talk?"

"Uh… no reason."

I thought about it for a minute. What kind of story did she want to hear? She seemed to notice my expression because she elaborated.

"You could tell me something about your high school days, other than the already told; or something form your childhood maybe; or maybe why you decided to come to the University of freaking Iowa, of all places."

I went with the last choice, seeing as how it probably was the least boring story. As a child, I was like many other guys, sporty; although I would only play soccer, basketball, or lacrosse. She'd already heard a lot about high school.

So I told her about applying to all the different film schools and the usual stuff. There was Columbia, NYU, University of Iowa, and even some place down in Texas and a few others. The truth was, I'd gotten accepted at Columbia and UI and one another I didn't remember. For an unknown reason, I'd felt compelled to go to Iowa, to get away from it all, and just leave White Plains behind for a while. By that time, I realized that she'd fallen asleep. I smiled a little to myself before getting up and heading down to the hospital cafeteria, knowing that she'd be sleeping for at least a few hours.

**-:-**

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Monday, January 2  
>10:00a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

What I didn't bother to tell Landon was that I'd only asked him to talk because he wanted me to rest and I couldn't help but feel soothed by his voice. Weird, right? Maybe not to some people, but the only person who'd been able to do that before was my own mother. His stories were always interesting though, too, whether he thought so or not.

When he said he'd felt compelled, of all words, compelled to come to Iowa, I was really curious. Sure, I'd been accepted other places too, and yes, I felt like Iowa City was the best choice for more than a few reasons, but compelled was a new one.

By that point, his story was coming to an end and my own eyelids were drooping more and more. Finally, I gave into my needs and fell into a rather quiet sleep, filled with a few absurd dreams.

**-:-**

**So, this chapter holds a little significance, think you can figure out what it is? **

**Anyway, I know it's kind of short, but it's not too bad. I'll try and make the next few chapters longer. Is it just me, or is the dullness of some normal hospital scenes bothering you too? Maybe it's just because I critique myself… **

**Well, smile on.! (: **

**-SDOW**


	18. Chapter18: Take it Easy

**Thank you for all the positive reviews the past few chapters; you guys are amazing! **

**This is meant to be 2012 by the way, just so the dates make since because I'm using my phone's calendar. And I do apologized if this chapter seems rushed, it may come off that way.**

**-:-**

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Tuesday, January 3  
>1:30p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I did my best to not mention how utterly boring it was being stuck in one room. I mean, I was still sore almost everywhere, but it was easier to bear every day. Thankfully, the planned on letting me out tomorrow, and after that, I could take care of more pressing matters.

Landon's twentieth birthday was on Friday. He'd been born on January sixth of 1992. I'd managed to get his gift (although he was a major protester) before New Year's, so that was out of the way.

Currently, I was just sitting on the bed, leafing through a magazine that Alicia had left behind for me.

"Massie!" Olivia squealed, rushing into the room and managing to literally drag Josh in behind her.

I contained the chuckle that was bubbling in the back of my throat. "Hey Liv, Josh."

"Hey," Josh greeted, wrenching his arm out of Olivia's unusually strong grasp.

"How are you?" she asked. Meanwhile, he shook his head at her antics.

"Just peachy." I managed to at least smile, forcing it through the hidden giggle.

"Olivia, calm down," Josh urged his girlfriend. Sometimes he would join in, but other times he just tried to calm her down while trying not to start laughing at her.

She sighed like it was traumatic. "Fine." Olivia was actually taking acting and dancing classes on the side, along with art. She was the mix-y girl of the group, and it worked. She put one hand to forehead, as if to faint, and then just sighed again and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Guess what?" she enthused, her mood drastically turning again.

"Hmm?"

"The snow is starting to clear up early this year!"

_Oh thank God. _"We definitely need that," I mused. The snow cause the ice, the ice caused the skidding, the skidding caused the car to hit me, and it was not okay with me. If the doctor was right, it was possible that I'd have nightmares about it. "And how are you two doing?"

"I'm fine, and I learned not to give Liv marshmallows," Josh chuckled.

She rolled her eyes. "I'm doing as well as always."

For what was probably another hour, most of the silence was filled with Olivia's and Josh's enthusiastic chatter while I asked question and such at exactly the right times. It was idle or anything either, it was bright and bubbly, making the hospital seem a lot less dull and boring.

Olivia suddenly looked down at her phone. "Darn, we got to go Josh, those classes that we have are starting in an hour. Sorry Mass, try and… well I guess you can't have a lot of fun, so be awesome," she trilled.

"Bye Massie," Josh waved as the pair left. I chuckled at their odd departure before turning back to the forgotten magazine.

I had another thought coming though, as usual. For some reason, Landon seemed to be looking at me differently. Automatically, I brushed it off, thinking it was just because I was in a hospital bed. But it seemed like I was wrong, that the look was a lot… more than I could imagine. Of course, I wasn't seeing it, but I can't bet you the others, at least a few, knew what was going on. _Just forget about it, Mass. You'll know at the right time_ that little voice in my head urged.

I rolled my eyes. That's what everyone said, that I'll know at the right time. When is the right time?

At that moment, my silent deliberations were over as none other than Landon himself walked back into the room. Our usual greeting (along the lines of _Hey Baby, how are you?_) came and left, simple as that.

Again, I saw that expression, but just brushed it off like usual. Maybe everyone was right, I needed to figure it out a different way, and it wasn't going to just be easy.

"Are you alright?" Landon asked, pulling me out of my reverie.

"Yeah, just… thoughtful." I smiled, attempting to pass it off.

"How sure are you of just being 'thoughtful'?"

"Pretty darn sure."

"Whatever you say. Are you excited to get out of her tomorrow?" he continued, reaching over the bed side to hold my hand.

I couldn't help but smile again. "Very."

**-:-**

**(A/N: Yeah, it's this chapter. Can't stand it. Ha ha)**

…

**Iowa City, Iowa  
>Mercy Hospital<br>Wednesday, January 4  
>11:30a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Okay, they told me I could walk with this boot, why am I using a wheelchair?" I asked. The fractures actually weren't bad enough for normal procedures. Like people said, I was very strong.

Landon looked down at me and chuckled. "Hospital policies. It's either this, or I carry you."

My eyes widened considerably. "On second thought, this works."

"I might carry you just for that anyway."

"Not if I can help it."

The nurse took over and rolled me (still unfortunately) out into the parking lot where, oh surprise, Landon had his truck waiting. God, he really despised my car.

I stood up, unsteadily for the first few seconds, and managed to get into the car in my own, even though he was more than ready to pick me up. We bid the nurse goodbye and he went around the other side.

That morning had been a flurry. Alicia had gotten clothes that I could change into, the forms and necessary stuff had to be signed, precautions taken into mind, and even a temporary prescription for my head to be taken care of. Yep, concussions were just lovely.

The drive was short and quick; we made it back to the university with plenty of time. Before he could stop me, I got down on one foot and steadied myself before setting the other down.

"You're supposed to be more careful than that," he reprimanded with a good-natured grin. Alright, he was acting a little bit different too, I admit it.

"On my defense, it was get out on my own, or have you pick me out because you have some strange… issue with that," I noted, holding up both hand like one of those scales.

"It's not an issue, it's a helpful gesture."

"Mm hmm, sure." I turned and started walking.

"How can you walk so normally with that thing on?" Landon inquired, putting his arm around my shoulder like I'd become accustomed to.

"Well, eh, I've kind of had one before," I admitted.

"What did you do?"

"Long story short, it involved a dare, a tree, and one very angry squirrel…" That was back when I'd been friend with a girl known as Strawberry and another one named Fawn.

We were still walking, but he did the whole slow-motion head turn with a raised eyebrow. I snorted at it, knowing he probably did it on purpose just to amuse me.

.

The rest of the day was pretty relaxed. I wrote a lot on a topic that I literally pulled out of a hat (my only baseball cap had slips of paper). And because Landon wasn't very content with me being alone (of course, I didn't mind), I got more than one very odd look when he saw what I was writing. Apparently, not many people pulled a slip of paper out of a hat and could spend a few hours writing about a leprechaun in the army. Let's just say Olivia helped with a few slips…

We did go to over to lunch not long after I got back. The affection that I kept getting from Landon made at least five girls all give me the infamous jealous look before they turned back to their own table and shut up.

From there was the general greetings and everything. All of it went on, like any normal college classless day, except for the fact that I had to wear a different shoe than normal to balance out the boot/brace type thing on my foot and ankle.

Somehow, I ended up lying on my stomach on the floor of Landon and Derrick's dorm room. Derrick was nowhere to be found, probably with Kristen, and Landon was sitting on the computer chair just kind of watching me (in that not stalker kind of way) and playing with the scenes of a film. I was writing the previously mentioned leprechaun army-man story. I guess that's what I got for following my CW professor's advice.

"You can't be very comfortable sitting like that," Landon mused, turning to look at me again.

I shrugged. "I'm pretty used to it. Ask Alicia, I don't use my desk very often."

"If you're sure…" Again, the hesitance, as if he couldn't stand seeing me in pain at all. Then again, maybe it was just a mutual thing. I couldn't bear the thought of him being in pain.

**-(0)-**

**8:45p.m.**

Somehow, that day faded into night without even one distraction. We'd talked to the others, Derrick had come and gone, but Landon and I were still in virtually the same place for the day.

At that point though, I'd gone from writing and lying on the floor to lounging back and watching a movie with Landon. Movies were just sort of our thing, a mutual interest, big time. Movies and music, big time musts in both of our lives.

I have no idea where he got a copy of _Love, Actually_, but I had a feeling that it wasn't his, although he seemed to enjoy the movie. Unless (Isn't there always an unless?) it wasn't the movie that he was enjoying… who knew?

By the time the movie ended, I could probably talk in a perfect British accent, but I wasn't about to try either. "I should probably get going," I announced, hiding my own reluctance with a yawn.

Landon and I stood up at the same time per usual. "Do you want me to walk you?" he asked.

"Nah, I'm fine, but thanks for the offer," I smiled. He was being an even bigger sweetheart than I'd gotten used to.

"Okay… Be careful," he added, "for real this time."

"I will, calm down. Have a goodnight, Landon."

"'Night Massiekur," he grinned and those old butterflies returned, only worse- _a lot_ worse. Well, it gets worse before it gets better… sometimes.

Being in a more neutral state of mind, we hugged before departure. The part, even through clothing, that touched had the old electricity spark flow through, but that was worse too. Chemistry between us, perhaps? I had no idea, but the little things I noticed were definitely stronger.

I went off, still walking slow because of the boot/brace on my foot. _**(Hard to explain, but kind of like a brace around the ankle and lower leg with bottom strap-like things to keep it hooked on. Hope that makes sense…)**_

Back into my dorm I went, going into the bathroom to take a shower. Really, the hospitals just didn't do me justice at all. I toweled myself off and blow-dried my hair, being careful of my left leg the whole time. It still did hurt to walk and stuff, but not bad enough that I could complain. I got hit by a car and made it out with minimal injury, Halle-freaking-lujah.

That night, Alicia was going to be out late, probably going to a midnight movie or something with Chris. I crawled into my own bed and turned off the lamp, setting my iPhone on the nightstand so it was close.

Right before I got comfortable, my phone buzzed.

**Landon: Have a good night, Mass. If you need anything, just text or call, no matter what the time. Do you understand me? Xx.**

**Massie: Ha ha, fine, I understand you. You have a good night too. Xx. **

**Landon: Thank you. Xx.**

I shook my head to myself. Dang, the boy was very protective at times, that was for sure.

I dropped off to sleep shortly after.

That was the first night that my memory came back to me in the form of a nightmare.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Wednesday, January 4  
>10:10p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I have no idea what possessed me to send that text message. It was most likely just my natural yearning to make sure she was okay, whether I was around or not. I was glad that she at least agreed.

That day had been, for lack of a better word, interesting. Whether she noticed it or not, quite often I would look at Massie in her own little writing world. All it took was some baseball hat filled with slips of paper, an unusually sparkly pen, and a patterned notebook and she was off. Her passion for writing was similar to mine for film, and it was amazing.

No, it wasn't amazing, she was. I had the whole "love" feelings worse every time I was around her for those past four days. At least, that's what my lovely roommate referred to it as, saying that he still had the same thing for Kristen. Why did I bother talking to him about the strange, seemingly feminine stuff? You've asked the wrong person because I have no idea.

That night was like any other. I changed, turned everything off, and just lay down, completely normal. The only difference was that Derrick wasn't already snoring on the other side of the room because he was off with Josh or something while Olivia and Kristen hung out. It was obvious that even before I'd come around, that relationships had always been a big thing among the seven of them.

Massie and Alicia could name off _anything_ about each other and almost anything about the other five. Kristen and Olivia were the same, only different people. Chris and Josh hung out quite frequently. So basically, Derrick had been the odd one out just going to and fro in the group on closest friendships, and Massie had been the same way on romantic relationships. Then again, that was before I came around.

Before I fell asleep, I hoped that Massie really would text or call or whatever if anything happened. It was likely that she would have nightmares about the whole incident, and I knew she was going to be alone because if Chris was out without a guy, then Alicia was with him.

Massie was an independent person, very mature, even for a college student- most of the time anyway. It would be in her nature to take matters into her own hands if she didn't want to bother somebody, even though she should've known by then that she'd ceased to bother me _once _in almost five months.

**-:-**

**Yeah, no cliffhanger on his part, but there is one on hers, so. I'm still debating whether she should listen to him or not. Hmm… **

**Anyway, smile the night away.**

**-SDOW**


	19. Chapter19: And so the Nightmares Ensue

**So, I'd like to say thank you for the reviews and feedback. I don't suspect this story will go past Chapter25, but we'll see… The dream is being described in italics, even though it's kind of obvious, I still pointed that out. ._.**

**Anyway, ongoing… **

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Thursday, January 5  
>1:04a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

_It started with the kiss; that one cliché kiss that several girls (and guys sometimes too) dream about happening on the stroke of midnight, January first. I should have known the instinctual warning was bad not good, but I was too caught up in the moment of that night._

_From there on out, it was exactly like my New Year's night. The way we'd just been kind of staring at each other, that little trance; all of the memories were there. _

_And then I made the mistake of going to retrieve something from the car. I really was going to get something, but after the crash I don't remember what. It was probably my cell phone or something that I'd forgotten. _

_I was crossing the street, of course. Could this memory get any more obvious? The road was still iced-over. Between the slightly melting snow and weather that was rising and falling, it was pretty clear where it all came from. _

_My foot slid slightly, so naturally I took a few extra seconds to make sure I was right on my feet again. That was when the car came. _

_I saw the headlights, knew it was coming, and knew I should've gotten out of the way. All the thoughts were running through my head. _Move, dive, get out of the way somehow! _But no, I was frozen in place from fear. _

_There was the deafening screech as the driver slammed on their brakes. The car –luckily compact, not a truck or SUV- still slid slightly on the ice though, coming closer. Impossibly closer. The headlights shone unbelievably bright in my eyesight; the little ice making rough scratching and screeching noised as the car slid. _

_Just when it was around a foot or less away from me, I screamed, rather loudly I might add._

…

That's how I woke up, screaming into my pillow with my arms inexplicably slashing around. The whole thrashing part didn't make much sense, considering I was knocked unconscious when I got hit, but oh well.

My throat was hoarse from screaming as I swung my legs over the side of the bed and sat up. Alicia was still out, wherever out was.

The breaths came in and out of my lungs in that jagged fashion. So, the doctor was right. I did have the nightmare, and it did end up affecting me a lot. Until that moment, I didn't realize how much it had really scared me. No, that's a lie. I _had_ realized how much it had scared the living daylights out of me, but it didn't affect me at first.

I kept my head low in my hands, taking the deep controlling breaths that I'd learned in yoga with my mom a few years ago. For the first time in my life, I was thankful that she'd made me do the little mother-daughter program on it.

After what seemed like an hour –but was probably only five minutes- I turned my head slightly and saw my iPhone, taunting me from the nightstand. Landon had told me to text or call if anything, and I mean _anything_, happened, but I didn't want to. It wasn't that bad, I could handle it. Maybe…

One thing I definitely wasn't going to do was cry. It was completely a thought and possibility that crossed my mind, formed the lump in my throat, and even made my eyes water a little. But no, I wasn't going to let one little memory disturb me, not that easily.

My breathing was still ragged though, evening itself out very slowly, but surely.

The window in the room was cracked slightly, letting in the fresh, cold air that seemed to soothe my throat. The room itself was still blanketed in darkness. I'd also like night more than day, for as long as I'd lived. Even as a little girl, I preferred to lie out and watch the stars and read or write in the moonlight rather than do it during the day.

What I really wasn't planning on happening was Alicia deciding to make her appearance. The door made a soft clicking sound as she twisted our key in the lock.

Still startled from the unnervingly realistic dream, I slammed my back against my bed again and yanked the comforter up in an attempt to make it look like I was still asleep.

My left leg protested in the form of pain. I really didn't want to hurt it even worse, after getting out so easily from the accident, but what had to be done had to be done.

She slipped into the room; even in the darkness you could see the happy grin she was wearing. I turned my own oxygen intake down, making the sound seem light and peaceful. Out of the corner of one opened eye, my cell phone still seemed to be mocking me.

Alicia went into the bathroom briefly to change and clean up before crawling into her bed. She didn't even suspect that I was asleep. Not twenty minutes later, true sleeping sounds were coming from that side of the room. I sighed. My normal hours of sleep would be much decreased that night.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Dining Hall<br>Thursday, January 5  
>8:30a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

Sure enough, that night I didn't get much more sleep. Whenever I closed my eyes, the headlights would come back in view behind my eyelids. So I was forced to fight off the sleep as long as I could until I was tired enough to just conk out into a tossing/turning slumber.

All morning long, Alicia would give me sidelong glances, silently asking why I was so obviously tired. After all, I couldn't stifle every single yawn that made its appearance.

Currently, I was quietly eating small bites of the fruity yogurt, still surrounded by the usual people in the usual places. Landon looked like he really wanted to comment, but kept casting his eyes away instead. Maybe he was upset, but who knew?

I stuck another bite of the raspberry yogurt into my mouth and swallowed, washing it down with water. By that point, more than just Alicia were observing me every once in a while. I never, not once since they met me, had water at breakfast. It was always coffee or juice. I wasn't supposed to drink the former and really wasn't interested in the latter that morning.

"Up late last night?" Landon asked quietly, clearing meaning for it to reach my ears only.

"Uh… not at first," I replied, swirling the spoon around.

"At first?"

"Yeah, I had a dream and then was restless most of the night." My response was slow, carefully chosen.

"Are you sure it was just a dream?" he continued, still quietly.

"It was a kind of dream."

"A nightmare?"

"Maybe." Couldn't I lie to him? Nope.

"That's a yes," he sighed.

"Alright, so yes, kind of, it was really just a memory from that night."

"Okay, so you had a nightmare, still aren't giving details, but it probably freaked you out, and you didn't remember that I was just a phone call away?"

"That didn't exactly come to mind at first." So it wasn't a complete lie…

"Again with the 'at first'?"

"Well, once the worst part was over, it was like 1:20 in the morning and I didn't see the point in waking you up so I could complain about a bad dream," I shrugged.

"If it happens again, please let me know. Obviously you were pretty shaken up, and you did agree." Landon was probably a lot more upset or something then he showed.

And just like that, I was stuck with my fate. Apparently, being pulled out from behind your wall meant that you weren't allowed to try and hide behind it (even though it was gone) at certain times.

After finishing up breakfast, I made an excuse and moved off to my dorm again to think things over.

**-(0)-**

**Girls' Dorms  
>10:00a.m.<strong>

Mulling over my thoughts was difficult with the painful thoughts of the dream reappearing sometimes. The biggest questions in my mind were classic what-if's.

_What if the nightmare keeps happening?_

_What if it doesn't stop at all?_

_What if it becomes a bigger problem than it had become in one night?_

Life is filled with what-if's. The little what-if's: wondering if your hair is okay or if someone won't like it. Big what-ifs: worrying that you'll lose your job after that blame was placed on you. You can't control the obvious what-if's in life, but you can stop thinking about them and go with the flow.

Unfortunately, I was very good at finding those what-if's and overthought them a little too much.

Officially, I was in a loner kind of mood and for once in my life, was being anti-social by choice. Other times I felt that it was needed, but this was just a choice.

I remembered a phone conversation I'd had with my mother yesterday and smiled to myself. She'd practically screamed questions that were all peppered with her concern and worry. It'd taken about ten minutes just to get her to calm down and let me explain.

Her answer at one point? _"Massie dear, I'm twice your age and even I know that you shouldn't do that in a daze…" she'd teased. _

On my defense, I wasn't in a daze, but just went along with it because my protests would get me nowhere.

My hands itched to write. And hold your thoughts write there. I was not about to go grab my frilly little lock-and-key diary and scribble away at how hopeless and confusing and absurd my life was, especially when it wasn't true. Never, not once, had I been the type of person who kept a book of my own thoughts and complaints; my worries were cleared out through writing short stories.

Again, I pulled out the faded NY Yankees hat and sifted the papers inside before reaching blindly into it and picked one out.

**A stolen ring, a fear of spiders, and a sinister stranger: combine it!**

I had no idea how that had gotten into my idea hat, not even one. But it worked.

Within an hour, of which Alicia walked in at one point and chose to let me remain in my reverie for a while, I was buried into some random short story and getting my feelings out that way. For once, that little longing for going to my classes ignited inside of me. Apparently, one can just get that cooped up.

"How's the pain?" she asked suddenly.

I looked up. "Fine, I guess, I mean, it could be worse."

"You know, I was wondering –again- how much your opinions have changed," Alicia stated.

"Why do you keep bringing this up?"

"Because I don't believe that _you_ don't believe in love."

"Well, I guess they've changed a little…" I admitted.

"Thank you!" she screeched, throwing her arms in the air.

"I said 'a little', not completely."

"Well then, tell me about it _all_."

"Whatever, I guess it's just changed that I believe in it, alright? You were right, Cam, Chris [Abeley], none of them changed my opinions; I just forced myself to believe that to keep from getting hurt. Stop grinning like you're in a Cheshire cat completion, that doesn't mean what you're thinking." I chuckled.

"Yeah, sure, I'll believe that when pigs fly," she teased.

"Did you forget about Swine Flu?" I asked jokingly.

"That was truly terrible…"

"I know, thank you very much!"

And just like every serious conversation we had, it ended in a fit of giggles.

**-(0)-**

**2:00a.m.**

I had the nightmare again that night. And unfortunately when I screamed and woke myself up, I woke Alicia up too and fell out of the bed. Geez, I suddenly become very clumsy.

"Why are you screaming?" she asked groggily, sitting up across the room.

"Uh… I saw a spider?" I meant it as a statement, but it came out more as a question.

"Sure, sure. That explains _exactly_ how you fell off the bed," she chuckled, fully awakening.

"Well, you probably already know what it actually was," I sighed, standing up and getting back into the bed. "Sorry for waking you up, I just can't control it."

For the time being, I was struggling just to keep my voice sounding normal because it was raspy from screaming again.

"I know, and if you're freaking out, no need to hide it. Remember that time I fell off the roof and broke my leg? I had nightmares for a week or two after that," she reassured quietly. My throat still felt thick, the visions of headlights and the noise of screaming tires in my head.

"If I scream again and wake you up, you have full right to throw a pillow at my face," I teased weakly before throwing myself back against the bed.

"I might do that either way, just for fun," she countered. "G'night Mass."

"'Night, Leesh."

Despite my mindless joking, I was still at unease from the dream. Memories; terrible, eventful, and very important memories flooded my mind. If I was willing to make more noise, I would have growled.

I already knew that it would probably be a long night. It would get better. It just had to, right?

**-:-**

**Yeah, I know, kind of lame. Birthday chapter next though. **

**Review? Smile? (:**

**-SDOW**


	20. Chapter20: Birthdays and Butterflies

**University of Iowa  
>Campus<br>Friday, January 6  
>5:40p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

Oh, this was just wonderful. Although I protested _a lot_, all seven of them still managed to plan something for my birthday. I was only turning twenty. Maybe I'd be more lenient if it was my twenty-first. Secondly, I didn't feel like a girl from the weird feelings anymore, although the spark of a fifteen-year-old, hormone-crazed boy sometimes came into my mind…

"Do we really have to go out?" I groaned.

"Yes, we do, and we are," Massie stated. She raised an eyebrow, daring me to protest again. Even when she was annoyed it was still cute.

"I think you just got told," Derrick chuckled from behind me.

"You think?" I asked.

"Sorry, I know that you just got told." I sighed. Josh snickered and Chris shared a high-five with Derrick.

The only comfort of that night was the feeling of Massie's hand intertwined with my own. Dang, I had fallen hard. But of course, she still hadn't acknowledged feeling the same way at all. You could tell by her eyes that she had however had a lot of thinking time last night, most likely because she'd been rudely awoken.

"Into the car," Chris commanded, literally shoving me towards the door.

"Seriously? I'm twenty, not two, I can get in a car on my own," I snapped.

"Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed…" Chris grinned again. I just sighed.

We drove down to some restaurant and sat around, talking together. I was thankful that they'd finally stopped bringing up why we were out in the first place. Then again, don't count your blessings until you're positive that they're blessings…

We'd just finished eating dinner when suddenly a waitress walked up and asked Derrick to point out, and I quote, "the special birthday boy". With a victorious smirk, Derrick announced my name and pointed me out. At that point, I face-palmed, making Massie giggle and pull my hand away from my face.

They started singing, as loudly as they possibly could. Now keep in mind, we were a bunch of loud, rowdy college students, so people outside could probably hear the commotion too. I slammed my hand over my eyes, really not enjoying the attention.

"Happy Birthday!" all the staff and my _friends _shouted before the waiters and waitresses ambled off and everyone at the table had the look of utter triumph smeared on their expressions.

"You guys suck," I muttered.

"You know you love it," Josh countered in a high-pitched voice. Four (all girls) eyebrows rose while Derrick, Chris, and I all just looked scared.

"Well, I think Josh may have snuck some illegal substances in here so we may want to leave…" Alicia sighed.

"Well, if we're leaving, whether he likes it or not, we have to at least have something else to do," Massie acknowledged, spinning her iPhone on the table top.

"I say we go back to the dorm to take care of that thing," Olivia announced while fiddling with one of her earrings.

"Perfect," Kristen grinned. Oh God, they had a conspiracy against me now…

"Let's go then," Massie announced, finally setting the little black tab down on the table. Apparently, they'd taken care of it while I was hiding…

We all stood up, Massie managing to summon all of her strength and drag me along behind her. The car ride back was fairly quiet. I still didn't see how they had figured out how to make it seem quick, even though ordinarily I would be overly agitated by that point.

"You're being awfully quiet," Massie noted, tilting her head and studying my face. She wasn't going to figure out much, especially since I had to try and control the look in my eyes so she wouldn't realize what I really felt…

"Eh, habit sometimes," I shrugged.

"Please," she scoffed.

"I just feel like being quiet today."

"Sure…"

We made it back to the dorm where, in the common room, surprise, surprise, they'd set up some kind of display. I should have known that they'd have someone hired to get it ready. There was a cake there, a few gifts, and it felt like we were a lot younger than we really were. And there was no doubt that they were going to make me do candles even. I sighed to myself, earning a pointed look from my girlfriend.

Derrick made a big show of playing with the lighter and attempted to go after Kristen with it, who just glared and blew out the flame he was holding out.

They seriously sang. They seriously made me blow out the candles and did the whole counting to see how many partners I had thing. They seriously embarrassed me. I don't know why, but I'd always been one to try and flight away from certain attention points. Some things I was fine with, others I felt like banging my head on a wall until it disappeared.

In the mismatched order, after grudgingly blowing out the candles, I had to sit down and was watched carefully while opening a few packages. One of them was a new camcorder, which I assumed was from half of them, like they'd pitched in together. Although, nobody said anything, so I could only make assumptions. The other was a ticket. A ticket for a cruise. What had they planned this time?  
>"Um… what is this for?" I asked, holding it up.<p>

"What does it look like?" Alicia retorted.

"That's not what I meant, I mean, what's going on?"

"Oh, ha ha, we all pitched in and you're going on the cruise that we were all already planning on going on this summer," Massie finished for her after the two had shared a look. I guess I knew where that idea came from.

"Oh. Well then, thanks you guys, they're both really cool." _Cool? Nice word choice, Landon…_ Apparently Massie picked up on the way I said the word because she chuckled to herself.

"Now, we're done pestering you." Josh paused to smirk. "So, you have to decide what we do now."

It was eight at night; what exactly could we even do? "I have no idea," I shrugged.

"They set up a pool table towards the back. Do you play pool?" Chris offered.

"Sure, why not."

"I say we go guys against gals," Derrick said mischievously.

"How is that fair? I don't know what I'm doing…" Massie trailed off.

"That'll just make it more interesting."

"Fine," Kristen scoffed.

All eight of us got up and separated, Massie and Kristen were both talking to the other girls with devilish smiles. I was suddenly wary of Massie's claim to not know what she was doing.

I took the first shot, managing to knock one of the stripes in once in separated. That left another shot to be made, which failed miserably. Massie bit her lower lip and widened her eyes innocently while stepping up to go first for the girls. She took on the stance and the innocence vanished completely and turned into some sort of determination.

She pulled the cue back and then shot it forwards with a rather loud noise. And it worked. She got one of the solids in and switched her expression again. "Is that good?" she inquired, tilting her head again and letting her straightened hair hang over one shoulder. _Hands to yourself, Crane._

Derrick face-palmed. Josh snorted. Chris sighed. I was silent.

The game went back and forth. The weakest one on their team turned out to be Alicia; nobody understood how Olivia was so good, especially Olivia herself. Josh seemed to be the worst on our team, but was good-natured and didn't really care as long as he was having fun. I guess I was alright, not terrible, but not super fantastic or anything.

On the girls' team, Massie and Kristen both held the lead up and were easily the best out of all eight of us. Derrick was a bit too cocky about it but understood when he missed anyway. I was shell shocked still though. Massie played all of us; she did a little game of innocence and was now teamed up with Kristen to try and completely annihilate us. Oh… yay!

"Now Derrick, was it really such a good idea to try and play the gender game?" Massie asked innocently.

"Shut up," he grumbled.

Did I mention that their plan was working? Oh… well it was. They were annihilating us. I didn't mind very much though, Massie looked cute doing it. Wow, I really did have issues.

"I tried to warn you," she said in one of those singsong tones, moving carefully to the other side an eyeing him.

"You said you didn't know what you were doing."

"You should have seen through it."

"Don't turn this around on me."

"Why would I ever do that?"

Opposite sides of the pool table, Derrick on one, giving Massie the look like she was Satan's spawn; Massie on the other, one eyebrow quirked, a half-smirk lazily etched on her mouth. Neither of them blinked in that disturbing yet utterly fascinating way.

"Can you two stop making google-y eyes at each other so we can get on with this," Josh prompted with a satisfied smirk. That moron; they were probably both going to go after them now.

The horrified expressions that overcame both the boy's and the girl's faces were priceless, and reassuring. They had no interest in each other that way. Good.

"That's disgusting," Massie snapped, shaking her head as if to get the thought of it out.

"That would be like dating my sister. Which, in case you didn't know, is incest you idiot," Derrick huffed.

Josh backed up slightly. "So, how about that game?"

"I'll take care of him later, let's get this over with," Derrick agreed. In unison, Massie and he shot Josh another finalizing glare and we went back to the game.

In the end, although it's no surprise, the girls won. I just shrugged, it was still fun anyway. That day wasn't going to be one of those times you just forget and shove into the deep recesses of your mind for an absent-minded thought train that got lost in a nighttime thunderstorm to find.

**-:-**

**11:00p.m.**

Somehow… Okay fine, on purpose thanks to my part, I ended up with Massie sitting beside me on my bed, staring at the ceiling rather than paying attention to whatever nightly sitcom was on.

Half an hour ago, she'd made to lead but I decided to stop her. For no apparent (or blatantly obvious) reason, I just did it.

…

"_I should probably head back. But happy birthday, Landon," Massie said, smiling softly and starting to stand up. _

"_Why don't you just stay with me tonight? It's not like we haven't done it before," I pointed out. I still didn't understand the whole "in love" thing, but I knew the feelings were there, and they weren't going away no matter how hard I tried. So, give me a good reason why I couldn't ask. I preferred to just relish the feeling of her tucked into my arms in that cuddly and subconscious way she always was. _

"_Um… I would, but the…" she trailed off again, biting her lower lip and looking kind of nervous._

"_Massie?"_

"_I scream. At least, the past two nights anyway. It's from the nightmare. I always scream. I don't want to wake you up or something." It came out so fast you would've thought she was a descendant of the Energizer Bunny. Either that or she was drunk and was slurring from the inability to properly speak. _

"_It's happened to me before too, and I know it's not fun. I think it's happened to everyone sometime in their life." _

"_Yeah, but it' so… ehck." _

_I chuckled. "Ehck, huh? Would you change your mind if I say please?"_

_She sighed. "The screams…" _

"_Can be comforted. Please?" Seriously, I had no idea why it felt so important to me that she was there that night. Just another false feeling, or one of those truthful gut feelings?_

_She smiled again, once again managing to make me have to remind myself to stay put. "I guess, if it's so important to you. Just let me go change first."_

_She was back around fifteen minutes later, clad in dark purple and white plaid pajama pants and a fitted black T-shirt. _

…

And there we were, half-sitting, half-laying (saying maybe? Or litting. We could call it lounging…) on my bed, Derrick having never come back in the first place.

Our positions switched gradually, slipping lower and lower until we found ourselves under the comforter. Massie was undeniably quiet, our foreheads touching as we did the classic and possibly cliché staring game.

For the first time since realizing it, I wanted to tell her that I loved her and confess. Maybe even shout it to the Heavens if it felt necessary. But how can you just tell something when you knew they didn't believe in it. Had her opinions changed? Oh geez, I hoped that I wasn't one of those guys who was in love with someone who didn't feel the same way back. Like their fates were meant to be intertwined but to never completely mesh.

"In advance, I'm sorry if I hurt your eardrums, fall out of bed, or all around annoy you. I understand if I do… Goodnight, Landon," Massie said quietly, still not breaking the little ogling match.

Seriously, I doubt she could ever annoy me for more than five minutes. It was just too easy to forgive her, or at least it probably would be. I had yet to experience annoyance… "'Night Massiekur. Thanks for being part of a pretty good birthday."

She snorted, probably thinking something along the lines of, "Your welcome for forcing you to do it" in that style she used.

I have no idea who fell asleep first, but I'm pretty sure it was both of us who woke up at the same time.

All in all, she wasn't lying. And I was always going to be there, no matter what. It was hard to understand, I just knew I would be.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Saturday, January 7  
>2:05a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I felt ashamed because the nightmare was there and happening. I knew it seconds I would be screaming. But in the very back of my conscious mind where I couldn't control much while I was asleep, I knew that I was beside Landon. Dammit.

Sure enough, my eyes flew open and my mouth was open, but there wasn't any sound. Well, that might be because there was a hand over my mouth. It was gentle, but noise blocking. Landon hovered over me slightly, nothing but concern on his features. It was then that I realized that I'd instinctively balled my hands into self-defensive fists and gingerly stopping digging into my own hands. Sometimes the acrylics really didn't do any good.

Of course, I was still internally freaking out, but opted to not show it. And then another thought crossed my mind and I almost fainted right then and there.

Oh no…. just because I didn't go against it anymore didn't mean I was a part of it. But it was becoming so obvious to me; and no, I couldn't fight it. I had to pick now of all times to see the light? I was falling for Landon Crane. Yeah, I guess I'd believed in love for the past few years and lied to myself, but that didn't mean I was supposed to be a part of it! Oh God, he could not find out. As far as I knew, he was totally against it too. He'd never said anything about changing his mind, but what if he had?

"Better now?" His deep voice was kind of like the distant rumble of thunder. Oh great, I had gone temporarily insane as well. Score one for Massie, woo! He'd moved his hand by that point, but was still only around six inches from my face.

"Dandy." I struggled to keep the sarcasm out of my tone. How could I be great? I was in something I didn't initially believe in.

"It'll be okay, it always is," he replied gently, using one hand to sweep my bangs out of my face. My pulse rate quickened stealthily and I was busy mentally cursing myself.

I just nodded numbly as he switched back over to his normal position.

_You've just found yourself a real problem, Massie Block…_

**-:-**

**I debated revealing it in this chapter or not. So, if it isn't obvious, they have no idea how the other one feels. Yet, I already have a plan for that to be revealed. And the cruise thing is actually just a kind of preview for the sequel I'm planning to this. Said sequel would be summer and such, so yeah.**

** So, review? **

**Lovely! **

**-SDOW**


	21. Chapter21: Brooding Thoughts

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Saturday, January 7  
>1:55a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I woke up at one point, maybe because I was very aware of the way Massie was not peacefully sleeping like usual. It also could've just been nerves or something. The room was eerily quiet at that point, save for the sound of my and Massie's breathing.

Out of nowhere, she let out a small whimper and I could just tell something was about to happen. Call me odd, but it was just kind of intuitional. Then again, why had I basically pleaded her to stay if I knew it was coming? There were two logical answers and they were both true. One, I just wanted her there with me for the obvious; and two, I think I just wanted to be able to comfort her so she didn't have to deal with it.

Just as out of the blue as the whimper, the inevitable scream started. Without thinking (smart, right?) I shot up so I was over her and gently placed one hand over her mouth, making sure that her nose was still clear. Massie didn't fight it, but her hands did curl up into fists.

A few seconds or so later, she opened her eyes, looking bewildered, confused, and kind of tormented. It was sad, how vulnerable she looked. Even in the dark, I could see every single wall and boundary ever built had been brought down through her eyes.

Something flickered in her eyes; something I really did not recognize. It made me even more curious, especially since it occurred to me that I really should know what it was.

I mentally shook the thoughts out of my head, whilst removing my hand, and asked, "Better now?"

"Dandy," she replied. Even though it was clear she was trying to keep it out, her voice was still dripping with sarcasm.

I was quiet for a moment, still leaned over her and looking around her expression. "It'll be okay, it always is," I said gently.

Massie seemed transfixed on something- either her thoughts or how close I also had just realized I was. She nodded mutely and I switched back over to my original position.

What could've easily been an hour or a few minutes later, she finally settled back in and curled up against my chest… Something I probably enjoyed way too much. I mean, it was like I just wanted her _there_. Not necessarily doing anything, but just her presence made me strangely happy. Geez, maybe there _was_ something wrong with me…

At that point, Massie had fallen back asleep. Now, I didn't know she was much of a sleep talker, which she probably wasn't, so I was a little surprised when I heard the words "dammit", "Landon", "love", "sin", and "never". What exactly was I supposed to make of that? Specifically I was worried about my name, love, and never. It would've been a lot easier if she'd managed to turn it into a sentence.

I put my thoughts to a screeching halt, really not wanting to overthink things and worry myself. Some-odd minutes later, I was just falling asleep. I swear that I heard her murmur a very unladylike word before I drifted off though.

**-(0)-**

**8:00a.m.**

In the like three times –maybe four- that I'd slept in the same bed as Massie, she'd always woken up first. Most of the time she'd get up, but this time she was still asleep. I debated waiting it out, which would've worked just fine, or getting up to shower. Though it made sense to just go with the former, I ended up choosing the latter and carefully got up. It was hard not to just lay there, I'm still not sure why I chose to get up, but I did.

Around twenty minutes later, I stepped out of the shower and toweled my hair (kind of feeling like an idiot). I yanked on my boxers and jeans, realizing that like usual, I'd forgotten my shirt. The shirt was probably due to my sleeping habits. Most nights, I slept without said shirt, but I usually kept it on around Massie because I had no idea how she'd react- good or bad.

Discarding my towel back onto the rack, I stepped out of the bathroom and walked into the room, attempting to find a decent T-shirt in my closet. Great, laundry time had arisen.

Midway through my search, her voice broke me out of my strange thoughts. "So, when were you planning on waking me up?" Massie inquired, tilting her head ever so slightly while running her fingers through the barely there knots.

"Whenever I found a shirt," I sighed.

"Well, I was going to leave, but figured it would be best of I left a note or something since you're not attached to your phone like I am to mine. Any who, I discovered you have no paper in the room, aside from that school bag, and it would've been worse to bang on the door…" she shook her head while finishing. "My point is… I'm going to go shower and stuff back there." Massie hooked a thumb in the general direction of the girls' dormitories.

"Alright. Come back here and we can go down to the dining hall or something?"

"Mmkay" she shrugged. Something was definitely off.

Massie left the room, giving me a smile before she walked off. I was genuinely befuddled as to when the sudden personality change came about. It wasn't often that you were digging through your closet shirtless while your girlfriend was sitting with her legs crossed like she was trying to make sense of something.

I went about to reorganizing my messenger bag, as college classes were resuming on Monday, for the next few minutes before realizing that I had nothing to do.

About twenty minutes later, Derrick waltzed into the room, probably wondering why I was sitting on my desk and staring out the window.

"So, did you tell her yet?" he asked. I didn't even tell him; he'd apparently "seen it in my eyes". Either way, apparently everyone knew from my expression, excluding Massie.

"No, I didn't. And I really wish you would stop asking," I replied coolly.

"You have to tell her at some point, man. I mean, you can't wait forever."

"Derrick. I've only been with Massie technically for like sixteen days."

"And your point is? It's obvious that it's been that way from the start, so why not just tell her."

"…"

"Just grow a pair and do it; I certainly wouldn't want to wait forever if I was her," Derrick mumbled the last part. That was the instant that Massie chose to knock on the door before actually just walking in. I didn't really mind, considering I'd already done the same thing more than once.

That same, unnervingly neutral expression was on her face. It somehow reminded me of the calm before the storm, or like she was hiding something.

"I see you found a shirt," she replied, still seemingly unfocused. Her tone seemed unnaturally flat.

"Are you alright?" Derrick and I asked in unison. It didn't surprise her or us, I was her boyfriend and he may as well have been her brother.

"Should I not be…?" Open-ended questions… Great.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. It was a possibility. She seemed like the type to act calm about something and rant to herself on her own.

Finally, actual emotions! She chuckled lightly, like some private joke. "Quite the contrary really."

"This ought to be interesting," Derrick murmured. He had taken to searching around the room for God knows what.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Disregard it, I'm lacking caffeine," Massie responded with a slight wave of her hand.

"That's true, but I seriously doubt it," Derrick muttered.

"Says the guy not only talking to himself but probably looking for something that isn't there so he can hear the conversation," she giggled, starting to turn more normal again.

"Shut up," Derrick pouted before leaving the room.

"Well then, shall we?" I inquired, hopping down and walking up to her.

"Eh, sure," she shrugged again.

During the walk to the dining hall, just a few steps in really, I couldn't resist. Before I said anything though, I did notice how she walked so easily in the boot.

"So, did you know you talk in your sleep?" A small grin managed to creep out.

"Oh Lord… I've had this conversation several times. What did you get the pleasure of hearing?" Massie seemed cautious, as if she didn't want to know what I'd heard.

"Well apparently, you haven't quite succeeded in becoming a writer because you couldn't make a straight sentence, but I heard a few words."

"Like…?"

I paused in my answer, trying to remember them all. "There was _dammit, Landon, love, sin _and _never._ Seriously, you managed a few obscenities that I didn't think you knew about…"

She started giggling. "My subconscious mind has a bigger attitude, ask Alicia. That was so her fault though… Anyway, that was just one of those don't-remember-it dreams or something."

"Oh."

By that time we had reached the dining hall and got some minor breakfast food before joining the other six and chatting mindlessly. I, for one, was still brooding over what it could all mean.

"_Landon." "Love." "Never." "Quite the contrary really." "Disregard it, I'm lacking caffeine." _

Golden question time! What in the world did it all mean?

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Dining Hall<br>Saturday, January 7  
>9:05a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

I was in fact, just drinking my coffee and staring at my yogurt. I was still wondering how I'd managed to get myself into it, especially when I was so sure that I didn't believe in it. And my lovely mind-to-mouth filter that was broken let me talk in my sleep. That was just joyous too, specifically since I did remember that dream.

The sentence he heard was probably the one in my dream's dialogue that was along the lines of, _"Dammit Landon, I love you! Which, by the way, makes no sense because it should quite possibly be a sin and I never thought I'd end up in it again… for real this time."_ I had pretty impressive dream arguments and conversations. Really, it was quite entertaining.

And then my little contrary comment probably didn't do much but make him suspicious or curious… or both.

Geez, Landon, I told you it was your fault. Mister focused epidemic strikes again! Alright, was I seriously mad at myself for that? There was a chance, but since I broke every other freaking rule I had, why would it matter if I broke the last one? Besides, he was just so… I guess amazing that it didn't seem to make sense that he'd end up with me, of all people. There were several other girls ogling over him that I'm sure would be just about the same. More or less anyway…

I sighed to myself, twirling the plastic spoon absentmindedly in the strawberry yogurt. Who would've thought that being in love would be this complicated?

I nearly jumped when I felt a hand on my lower back. I'd recognize the hand anywhere, considering it was the only one that made me considerably warmer than I already was.

"I know I asked this twice this morning, but are you positive that you're doing alright?" Landon asked quietly.

"Yeah, just a bit thoughtful today," I muttered, taking a gulp of coffee and hoping that he'd buy it.

"I highly doubt that…" he murmured to himself, raising an eyebrow in my direction.

"…"

"You know you can tell me anything, right?" He looked at me with one of those indescribably intense gazes while saying the aforementioned.

"Yeah, I know," I answered just as quietly, playing with my fingers. Luckily, everyone else at the table seemed to be distracted with something else. In my head, it was more like _Yeah, most of the time. But I'm not stupid enough to say what's really on my mind right now._

"Massie…"

"Yeah?"

Landon sighed. "Nothing, don't worry about it."

The rest of our breakfast passed considerably quick, putting into context the fact that my brain was still on overload. After one of those quick goodbye montage things, and one of those distracting kisses from Landon, Alicia and I made our way back over to the dorm room quietly.

I knew that I was probably overanalyzing it; just another one of my tendencies. But sometimes you just don't know.

"How was your night?" Alicia asked casually, sitting down at her desk and powering up her laptop.

"Alright." I bit my lip, still thinking hard. She turned to look at me and bored into my eyes with her own.

"No way," she breathed with a little smile edging around her lips.

"What?"

"That explains so much… Ha ha, I knew it."

"Like I said… What?"

"You love him," she grinned.

"That didn't come out of my mouth," I noted, edging around the subject.

"It didn't need to," she singsong-ed.

"I do not." Stubborn and indignant, go me.

"You do too. So, when are you going to tell him?" The whole conversation was done in that brisk Alicia-esque manner.

"Who said I was going to tell anyone anything?" I asked, horrified.

"Aha, so it is true!"

"Uh..."

Alicia grinned again. "I'm glad you finally realized it," she said sincerely.

"You're going to blow this way out of proportion aren't you?" I inquired, trying not to smile.

"Oh, you know me…" Both of us started giggling.

But seriously, this was going to be interesting…

**-:-**

**So, anyway, I need a little bit of rambling. But it has some significance, so bear with me? Please? **

**So, I realized this might actually go beyond 25 chapters, whoo hoo! It's late so ignore my weirdness. Also, I was wondering, how long until they should find out? One chapter, two, three, four, five, ninety? No, actually I don't think I'll go very far past five or six… You can't stop me from asking for a little opinion. (: **

**Any who, thanks for all the reviews and things. You guys are awesome! :) **

**Review? **

**Grin to rival the Cheshire cat...**

**-SDOW**


	22. Chapter22: Decided

**A/N: Yes, I did totally just make up a room number for the CW classroom. So, go me... Oh and I totally forgot about the class Massie has with Landon after CW, but I got it back in now! Yeah… Enjoy.**

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Creative Writing- Room 204<br>Monday, January 9  
>10:05a.m.<strong>

**MB;**

All of the margins in my notebook were filled- mostly with side comments, but there were a few doodles. For the official day back into classes, we got to celebrate by doing actual work. Any who, I was working on the storyline for the "Epic Dares Night" and planning on thinking of a better title later. Alicia was fairly quiet beside me, working on her own tale. The classroom was probably the quietest it had ever been, which really didn't make a whole lot of sense, but it was true.

I turned the page and continued writing down little tidbits and pieces. For once in the past forty-eight hours, I was able to focus solely on what I was doing and try not to think about my latest revelation of epic proportions. On that note, sometimes I wished that Alicia couldn't read me like one of those open picture books with the size thirty-six as the font. Well, that and the fact that she's always tricking me into saying something I shouldn't when I'm not paying close attention.

The time ticked by without interruption as I scribbled down more and more of what I'd written back in December. My handwriting was a lot neater now that I wasn't completely rushing.

Class ended without incident. But then again, with Alicia as a best friend, there was bound to be some sort of incident sooner or later.

We walked down the hall, heading towards the general direction of our next classes. Mine was only a door away from hers so we usually walked together.

"So, are you going to tell him yet?" she asked innocently while we were making our way down the hall.

"No," I said in the flattest voice I could muster. If I wasn't watching my tone I probably would've screeched like some angst-ridden preteen.

"Oh, come on… It'll make a good tale," she grinned.

"What makes you think I'd tell you?" I countered.

"…"

"Exactly."

"No, I'm sure you would. Unless, something bad happened afterwards, which could be taken a lot of ways, but you probably know what I mean."

"Alicia." A few heads turned at my outburst, but I ignored them.

"I know, I know, don't talk like that. Besides, that could've meant anything." She sighed and twirled a lock around her finger. My eyes were still partially widened in horror.

"But it didn't mean just anything. Well then again, you're probably talking about… Wait what?" Alicia snorted. I might've misinterpreted that. **(It's meant as Massie freaking out or something.)**

"You have fun in there," she said cheerily, waving while she walked to the next door.

I shook my head and went into the room, walking to the back and taking my usual seat next to Landon. I have no idea how he always got there so quickly… Maybe I was just a slow walker with the freaking boot.

"What did she say this time?" he asked, looking closely at the expression on my face.

"Uh… nothing," I replied, composing my thoughts.

"I hope you're not thinking of being an actor because that did not work well in your favor."

"Oh darn."

"Seriously, what happened?"

"Not much; just had a fairly interesting conversation." I was doing well at being normal around him, although it was hard to control those fleeting thoughts in the back of my mind.

"I don't want to know, do I?"

"Meh, doesn't matter."

The professor chose that moment to launch into yet another of the accustomed lectures for that class. It was more of an extra class, used mainly for credits and such. Not many college students were probably super focused on every tidbit of Iowan history.

I did my part and half-heartedly took notes, desperately trying not to think about Landon. This, I must add, was rather difficult considering we were sitting unnecessarily close to each other at the shared desk/table.

Like the first day I met him, he was twirling a pencil around, lacing it through each of his fingers and looking at the professor in a way that suggested he was asleep with his eyes open. One girl gave me a rather snarky-looking glance when Landon traded in his pencil for playing with my free hand (the right one was still writing down "important" information). I giggled slightly, understanding why so many girls were interested.

"What's so funny?" he inquired quietly, still playing with the fingers on my left hand.

"Oh, just a little something," I whispered dismissively. That only earned me one of his raised black eyebrows and a look of confusion. I grinned and turned back to my notes.

It was true, I normally got at least one glare a day, which would clear up soon if luck was on my side. I'd even heard the classic conversational bits. Like I said, the college I was in had several people who thought they were still in high school. According to the mass of overly-flirty girls, Landon Crane did not date, and it didn't make sense that he'd end up with me of all people. Those usually just made me snicker to myself.

"Somebody's in la-la land…" Landon muttered. Our hands were just flat out intertwined now.

"Just busy inner monologue-ing." I yawned after receiving a rather odd look from him.

The professor was completely oblivious to the twenty different conversations ringing quietly throughout the room.

I had my head tilted, letting the curtain of straightened hair linger by my face. Landon was staring at me in another one of those ways, an unreadable tone flittering in his captivating orbs. And I was doing it again…

"Are you enjoying the show?" I inquired, raising an eyebrow.

A grin slowly spread across his features. "Yep."

"I was expecting a more sarcastic answer than _that_."

"Sucks for you, darling."

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Iowan History- Room 312<br>Monday, January 9  
>11:23a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

I got caught staring at her… again. Seriously, I had major staring issues, but it didn't help with the whole noticing the [assumed] impossible thoughts in the back of my head and the fact that she naturally had little habits. Massie tended to either subtly pout or bite down slightly on her lower lip when she was bored or nervous. If she was trying to look really attentive when she really wasn't, she would occasionally tip her head to the side ever so slightly.

The little things were getting worse as well. I kept feeling the need to just shout out how I really felt, but didn't particularly want to scare her off. I'd never been interested in anyone, yet Massie somehow managed to captivate me without even trying. I was still immensely attracted to her no matter what she did or what she looked like. It was kind of frustrating, in all honesty, to have to hide it because I couldn't just do it…

Once in a while, her equally brilliant eyes would flicker over to me. They looked curious, a bit frustrated, and something else that I couldn't put into words. I wondered why anything unnamable or aggravating would be going on in her mind. The remainder of the almost two hour class (thirty minutes left) left me silently trying to decipher her. But Massie was a lot more exclusive than I thought. I knew that the people around us -as in the other six- could read her easily, yet I was still having trouble.

Maybe she was keeping something important from me… Was that the key? Whatever I _could_ see in her eyes was the result of some big secret or something?

I sighed. Maybe, just maybe, I could ask Alicia; because really, asking Derrick at that point was officially pointless. Does everything have to be so complicated?

Massie looked over at me again, a small smile playing on the edge of her lips. Seriously, if she kept smiling or biting her lip, it was going to be her fault if I kissed her in the middle of class. And that smile made me wonder even more considering she still looked mildly frustrated.

Class ended all too quickly and we dispersed, heading over to the dining hall. She walked with me, as usual, and another one of those smiles started edging around when I put my arm over her shoulders.

Like everyone else, we went through the line, grabbed whatever unnamable food it was (or salad in her case) and sat down at the round table in the back right corner. Alicia and Chris came next, closely followed by Kristen and Derrick. Five minutes later, Olivia came in with Josh, looking slightly confused. She was a smart girl, but she just didn't know how to use her mind sometimes…

"Hola," Alicia trilled. Chris looked at her before shaking his head, giving a wave, and plopping down.

"What's up?" Derrick greeted, earning himself a Kristen eye-roll.

"The sky," Josh responded sarcastically. Olivia giggled. I'm pretty sure Massie shook her head, but it was so subtle, I might've been wrong.

Around ten minutes later, she spoke again. "Seriously, just drop it," Massie replied quietly and unnervingly calm to Alicia.

Although I was curious, I turned away as to not intrude. It wasn't hard to not here them though because there was kind of pop and muffled snickers.

All of us guys turned to look at Alicia and Massie. Massie was getting the death glare, her shoulders shaking with silent laughter. Alicia was the one glaring, her hand placed firmly on top of Massie's mouth.

"Alicia, I wouldn't do that," I began.

"And why is that?"

"Don't say I didn't warn you…"

"Ew, Massie!"

"Don't tell me ew; you put your hand there in the first place," Massie pointed out. Alicia wiped her hand on her jeans. "And besides, you freaking deserved it and you know it."

"Fine, I won't bring it up for an hour. But that's all you get, Serene," Alicia announced.

The whole table was still looking at them both curiously, including yours truly.

"Alright-y then, Juniper."

Massie got another glare for that one; but it was okay because she just grinned and leaned back, arms crossed against her chest. They finally both realized that the whole table was watching them in amusement and confusion.

"Uh… nothing to see here," Massie said slowly, enunciating each word.

"Nothing at all," Alicia added.

Lunch resumed, although I was still, after at least three hours, trying to figure out Massie.

**-(0)-**

**Boy's Dorms  
>8:30p.m.<strong>

I laid on my back, throwing a tennis ball into the air and catching it while I thought. I was also hoping I wouldn't manage to drop it and smack myself in the face, but eh, you never know. Derrick was on the other side of the room, possibly staring at the light grey wall. It was silent, not counting the little pat of the ball whenever it hit my hand.

"She believes in it, you know. You should really talk to her?" Derrick said, breaking the quiet streak.

"Huh?" I decided to play it up, not being exactly positive on what he meant.

He turned to look at me, giving me one of those don't-play-dumb looks with his brown eyes… Massie would be proud. "You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"No, I only think… I don't _know _one-hundred percent."

"Oh, really now?"

"Fine, I get it. But how would you know anyway?"

"Alicia," he stated.

"Figures. Just because she believes in it doesn't mean the feeling is mutual," I noted.

"It's blatantly obvious to the rest of us," Derrick scoffed. By then I'd let the baseball fall to the bed.

"We haven't been dating for even a month. Isn't that a little… early?"

"Not if it's the truth. Besides, you've probably known since the day you laid eyes on her."

I shrugged.

"Just do us all a favor, and talk to her soon. Think about it. She feels the same way, yet neither of you give a sign… she just might think that you turned to roll the other way," he noted casually.

"How did I ever get stuck rooming with you?"

"Luck of the cards."

It was quiet again. I was contemplating it. He probably was right… At least, about needing to tell her sometime soon; I was not gay. _**(Not meant to offend anyone, if viewed that way by anyone.)**_

That night I went to bed with about a million thoughts in my head. But one stood out clear as day. By that weekend, I had to tell Massie.

**-:-**

**I will update soon. Well, I have family in, so as soon as possible because I've been inspired by my weird daydreams. Any who, have a good day!**

**Review?**

**-SDOW**


	23. Chapter23: Learn From Your Mistakes

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Common Room<br>Friday, January 13  
>7:30p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

The week had passed all too fast. I knew that I'd already promised myself to talk to her that weekend. But there was no way unless I saw a pig flying by my window that I was doing it on Friday. No chance, at all. I wasn't very superstitious, but it still seemed to be a bad idea to do it on Friday the thirteenth when I was already worried enough.

My biggest fear was that she would be freaked out and not want to talk to me anymore.

All of us were gathered in the guys' common room, just us males anyway. We were in a full on battle with the only TV in the room, seeing as only the four of us were there. Chris was in the middle of racing Derrick on Mario-Kart. I silently hoped that they didn't always drive like that for real, although Derrick could get pretty testy on the roads. I knew for a fact that Massie only did it to freak everyone out; you know the sharp turns and randomly speeding out of view, stuff like that.

Josh lounged backwards, eating flaming hot Cheetos and drinking Root beer; it didn't not look like a good combination. I was taking a few regular Lays every so often, but mostly busy rooting over the game like Josh was.

"Well, that sucked," I said dryly, seeing that the two had managed to tie. Both took two second-places and two first-places.

"Completely and utterly," Josh added, his mouth still full of Cheetos.

"Dude, say it don't spray it," Chris muttered.

"Just for that, you're not getting a towel," Josh huffed.

"Seriously, you two go so we can get on with the game," Derrick urged, snatching the orange bag away and tossing him a remote. With a shrug, I grabbed the other one and we started.

We went through all four courses of the round, ending up just like Derrick and Chris.

"This game is rigged," I grumbled. How is that we seriously both got ties?

"Want to try and find a game instead?" Chris suggested, pulling a hand through his dusty brown hair like it was a massive decision.

I shrugged. Josh lifted one shoulder in a similar half-shrug. Derrick switched the channel back to normal and put all the remotes away. Chris flipped through the channels before settling on a hockey game. It was the January 2nd rerun of the New Jersey Devils versus Ottawa Senators. I was for New Jersey myself, as was Derrick, but Josh and Chris seemed to be going the other way.

_**(May I remind you that this game has not happened yet, it happens January second of 2012, but it's already happened for them so… Yeah, I'll just randomly choose one.) **_

It was just a typical rowdy boys' night. All of us were erupting in cheers (and probably be downright annoying to others) when our preferred team scored. The chips were getting eaten faster at that point, the drinks going down faster. Josh and Derrick decided to have a burping contest, which both Chris and I declined, backing a little further into our seats.

By the end of the night, my troubles were almost, _almost_ forgotten, but not completely.

At ten, we separated, heading to our different sectors. Derrick passed out almost instantly. I, however, changed into my sweatpants and peeled off my T-shirt (still didn't sleep by Massie unless I had one) before crawling into the covers.

My head fell onto the pillow and I fell asleep, just like that.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Friday, January 13  
>8:45p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

In honor of our first week back in classes, that Friday we had a girls' night. We were going to go to the common room, but decided against it when we saw that there were a few lingering couples and a couple loner girls.

We were inside Kristen's and Olivia's dorm that time. Instead of the ivory walls that we had, there's was a very subtle and pale pink, coming off as an almost white. Sometimes I wished we had the light greys and blue like the boys' dorms had. Or at least they could've set it up as one generic design.

Kristen and Alicia were over by Kristen's laptop, possibly plotting my doom. The thought made my eyes widen slightly.

"What's the matter?" Olivia giggled.

"I thought I saw a spider, but it was just a shadow," I lied. Olivia, of all people, saw right through and knew immediately that I was thinking something completely different, which just made her giggle harder.

"Anyway… What do you think; should I go with the silver or the OPI a grape fit metallic purple?" I asked curiously, turning both bottles over in my hands. My acrylics were gone for a while, replaced with regular old nail polish and clear coats.

"Definitely the OPI, it's their best purple so far," she gushed. I chuckled and, upon her requests and pleading, let her paint both sets of my nails and add double clear coats.

In turn, I did her nails the OPI panda-monium (it's really spelled like that) pink. We sat side by side, watching one of those weird evening shows while Alicia and Kristen were still in the corner.

"Are you guys going to stay there all night?" Olivia whined, widening her eyes for effect. I had to admit, for acting a little on the ditzy side sometimes, the girl had talent.

"Nope, we just finished. Sorry, looking for some other stuff online," Kristen said with a shrug.

"Whatever, come and watch this totally pointless rerun of That 70's Show with us," I pleaded. It was true, I completely loved the show and had all the seasons on DVD back home, even though it was a little pointless.

Alicia shook her head, smiling still, and came and plopped down on the floor beside me, quickly followed by Kristen.

Being not-so-smart, we passed around twizzlers, sour gummy worms, and a few different kinds of chocolate. Other than that, we each had an energy drink. Alicia had opted for an original Monster, while Kristen went with Red Bull; Olivia had a Full Throttle black and I had a red Amp. Like I said, it was not the wisest choice at all.

I still hold opinion that Alicia started it. But no matter, either way, we ended up in a full-fledged pillow fight even though it was one in the morning by that point. We'd watched several nightly sitcoms before I got whacked, retaliated, and got into it.

I smacked Alicia, who hit me back hard enough to make me stumble. Somehow, the fight made its way to the beds as we jumped around the small room. Even in the freaking boot, I could still do it. I guess completely breaking your leg in a previous time gives you enough practice for it.

By the time two a.m. hit, we had finally tossed the pillows aside and were lying on the floor together, mindlessly chatting. We were half-asleep, so the conversation was filled with giggles and "wait… what?".

I have no idea when we fell asleep, but it was well past two.

**-(0)-  
>Saturday, January 14<br>11:00a.m.**

Blinking, I opened my eyes to find myself staring at the back of Olivia's head. Somebody in the room was whispering too, and it didn't sound like it was a girl. I looked slightly, finding Alicia's legs draped over my own. Apparently, when we'd fallen asleep, we'd crisscrossed over each other.

With slight difficulty, I sat up and nearly screamed. Landon, Derrick, Josh, and Chris were all standing in the room and looking at us with amused expressions.

"Hey, ten points for Massiekur, she managed to wake up first," Derrick cheered.

I looked around, ignoring him and finding that our energy drink cans were lying by each other on the floor and the empty candy bags were littered around as well.

I paused my gazing and thought for a moment. Wait a second, how did they even get in here?

"What are you doing here?" I asked, my voice still sounding like I was asleep.

"Meh, I used the key Kristen gave me after Chris found your room empty."

"What's going on?" Kristen asked, sitting up as well and letting loose a yawn.

"We could ask the same thing…" Josh pointed out, indicating the sugary remains and the pillows that were scattered e_verywhere._

"Can all of you just shut up?" Alicia snapped, sitting up to glare at us, especially the guys.

"That doesn't give you a right to come in here," I grumbled. Having a sugar high and passing out way too late at night didn't make anyone very happy.

"Aren't you happy to see me at least?" Landon inquired, giving me the puppy dog eyes. It was _so _not fair that he chose now of all times to use them, for him anyway. Even on him (To which they always worked) I was too disoriented to fall for it.

Instead, I grabbed a pillow and chucked it at his head. "No." He looked hurt. "But give me an hour and might be."

"Fine, but I'm timing you," he relayed, checking the time on his Droid.

"Um, should we wake Olivia up?" Kristen asked. We all looked over to find her still curled up.

Alicia grabbed another stray pillow and whacked her back. "Hey!" Olivia exclaimed, immediately coming to. I grabbed the garbage beside me and tossed it into a can.

"Well, that did the trick. Accomplices disperse!" Alicia announced. Both of us grabbed our bags and took off. Chris and Landon exchanged a glance before following us down the hallway.

"They're onto us!" she screeched, both of us running despite the slight throb it caused in my left calf.

Both in giggles, we ran into the dorm room and closed the door, locking it behind us. Alicia went into the bathroom first, cranking on the shower and closing the door. I rolled my shoulders and set about to throwing my dirty clothes in the basket by my bed.

"Um… are we just supposed to stand out here?" I heard Chris outside of the door.

"Ask Landon, I told him to give me an hour and Alicia's in the shower!" I trilled, looking through my closet for that days outfit.

"Dude, we still have fifty minutes left," Landon groaned. There was a soft thud as they apparently slid down the walls and sat down.

"Hey, how you doing?" "Good to see you." "Have a good morning." They kept calling out random greetings to people in the hallways.

I rolled my eyes and switched places with Alicia who had just finished, twenty minutes later. I took a relatively quick shower before blow-drying my hair, getting dressed, and straightening my tresses.

"It's been an hour," Landon sighed outside the door. I could see him standing there with one hand on it and his head down, waiting for someone to open it.

"Yeah, well, we're doing our makeup," I explained, trying not to smudge my mascara.

"Mass, you don't need makeup."

"Ha ha, you're funny." I added light gold shimmer and some clear lip gloss before pulling on my white knit Uggs. Alicia finished her own up and grabbed a pair of black moccasins.

"Think we should keep them waiting longer, just for the fun of it?"

"Most definitely," Alicia agreed. There was a click in the lock and Chris walked in, looking rather victorious.

"Your fault for giving him the key," I replied, before shoving my phone into my sweatshirt and sticking my wallet in my back pocket.

Landon looked kind of confused when I walked right by him. "I thought you said you were going to like me more."

Alicia and Chris were behind us. I wasn't actually sure where I was going. "I said I might, it wasn't definite."

"Oh come on…"

"What do you expect?"

"I'm never sure with you…"

"Well, if you're expecting me to be swooning, forget about it. I still have too much Amp in my system for that," I answered, turning around.

"Lunch then?" he inquired, checking the time again. It was already noon.

"Sure."

"Cool."

_**(I know I'm doing a lot of skipping around this chapter, don't harm me virtually! Please? [=) **_

**-(0)-**

**6:40p.m.**

After a normal kick-back Saturday, Alicia decided that she needed to start her little pep talk gone wrong yet again.

"Will you please just say it?" she begged.

"If you already know, what's the point in saying it?" I countered.

"Because I want to hear you just say it. It's simple; just say you're in love with him."

"You're the most confusing person ever."

"That's not confusing. You're stalling."

"Alicia!" I enunciated each syllable.

"Please?" she pleaded.

I hesitated. Landon and I were so early off in the relationship, although I suppose I should've seen it coming in September when he ran into me. I mean, he knew more about me than Derrick did, which was saying something. I was closest to Alicia and Derrick, but Landon had managed to get up in the ranks pretty fast.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes!"

"I'm in love with Landon Crane," I said in a barely audible whisper.

"Huh? Dude, you have to actually say it out loud."

I repeated it, not an ounce hirer.

"Massie. Serene. Block. Say it louder.

"I'm in love with Landon freaking Crane!" I finally yelled, throwing both arms into the air. "And I am now going on a walk, so stop smirking."

I threw open the dorm door and came face to face with none other than Landon himself. One of his hands was jammed in the pocket of his jeans, the other raised in the air like he was about to knock. The only thing on his face was disbelief. I felt like running, but knew I wouldn't get far with the boot.

"Oh shit."

**-:-**

**Yeah, I know it moved kind of fast, but the middle morning part was to show that you could in fact here people through the doors and walls, but it made a little more sense to add them getting ready and stuff… so. And I would've had this up earlier except I'm kind of an idiot and had some... eh, internet connection problems.**

**Review? Smile!**

**-SDOW**


	24. Chapter24: On the Verge of a Happy Dance

**University of Iowa  
>Boys' Dorms<br>Saturday, January 14  
>6:45p.m.<strong>

**LC;**

"I'm going somewhere," I said dismissively. Derrick quirked a blonde eyebrow and gave me a look.

"Well, be careful walking in, Kristen's coming over," he said slowly.

"That's nice."

I walked off and went across to the girls' dorms. Really, I was not anticipating this, but I knew I had to tell Massie that I loved her, it was better than keeping it bottled up. At least she was my girlfriend, not just my best friend or anything anymore. But it was just becoming harder and harder to keep it in. I'd already slipped once and had to turn the word "love" into luh-ike when I was talking to her at one point.

I came in front of her door, one hand still in the pocket of my faded Diesel jeans. I ran my other hand through my hair before raising my hand to knock on the door. And then Massie's voice stopped me short.

"I'm in love with Landon freaking Crane! And I am now going for a walk, so stop smirking." She threw open the door and froze in her tracks, her mouth parting in shock. Likewise, I couldn't really move.

"Oh shit," she said quietly. One hand was still clenched on the door.

"What is it?" Alicia asked, coming up to the side of her. "Did he hear that?" Massie nodded slightly. Alicia burst into laughter. "I _so_ should've seen this coming. I'm staying the night with Chris; be good children." And with that she walked off.

Massie's eyes cast downwards. "Only happens to me," she murmured, still keeping her gaze down.

"Were you lying?" I inquired just as quiet.

"Hmm?"

"To Alicia, were you lying to keep her quiet?"

"Unfortunately… no."

"Massie, look at me," I pleaded.

Nothing.

"Please?"

Silence. I finally just took my own finger and tilted her chin upwards. She looked… scared. Scared of what though?

"You weren't supposed to hear that," she said.

"I kind of guessed that…"

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"You had to hear that. You're the one who told me you don't believe in it. And come to think of it I didn't either." She bit her lower lip.

"I didn't believe in it because I'd never experienced the truth of it. I thought I loved someone once, but I really didn't," I corrected lightly.

Massie resolved to not say anything again.

"If it helps anything, I believe in it now."

She shrugged, that mortified glint still present in her amber eyes. I didn't know what to say. The obvious I'm-in-love-with-you-too seemed appropriate, but at the same time, it didn't seem like the best moment to just blurt that out. What really didn't help matters was that I was kind of on the verge of doing a happy dance, or yelling my proclamation to the Heavens- whichever worked best.

"Don't you think we should close the door?" I inquired, leaning backwards on my heels and looking out into the hallway before rocking back to where I was.

"Probably…" Her voice gave quiet a whole new meaning. Massie stepped aside, allowing me to walk in. The door closed with a soft _click_ and she leaned onto the desk, tilting her head downwards again. There was just no getting her to keep her eyes on me, like I would've preferred. Aside from the obvious (see mortification and horror, not to mention embarrassment), I wondered why she didn't like to look directly at people like that.

"Refusing to look at me again? I see how it is." I did my best to sound like I was upset, which I was, but more overjoyed and a little worried.

"It's not like that," she muttered.

"Then why won't you look at me?" A pleading undertone was still present.

"Because I have no idea what I'm going to see, and you, Landon Crane, scare the living daylights out of me," Massie admitted, her tone becoming more firm. It reminded me of something I'd heard her say once. _"I'm afraid, but aren't we all? The best I can do is hang onto this ride for dear life." _

"Is that a… good thing?" Great, let's get confused everybody!

"I don't know, is it?" she countered, taking a deep breath and finally looking up at me on her own free will. She paused. "You know, I'm kind of surprised."

"Oh?"

"I expected you to have run by now." She had no idea how much the same thought had been in my head.

"I told you that I'd always be here."

"That was before this."

"Yep, I want to say it was the second or something, anyway, when did you know?" I inquired.

"Why does it even matter? I've already gotten myself in trouble for this once tonight," she sighed.

"You can't sue me for asking, nor can you stop me. Besides, it will make a lot more sense pretty soon."

"Are you sure you don't want to run yet?"

"Need we go over this again?"

I'd never seen her do it before, but she sighed and ran a hand through her hair, twirling one bunch of strands around her index finger, her gaze falling back down to the floor. "Technically speaking, the day after your birthday, but it was like two in the morning so… I guess you could say the night of." Massie said it so fast that it sounded more like an extremely long word than a sentence.

I, despite desperation, couldn't stop the grin that was growing steadily on my face. She looked up through her eyelashes and instantly scowled at my expression. "It's not funny."

I stopped smiling. "I never said it was. However, it was the confirmation that might help me out a little bit here too."

I was a bit surprised by the way she looked suspicious; still a bit scared, horrified, embarrassed, and what not, but now she looked suspicious too. "Do I even want to know?" she asked quietly.

"Hopefully… But I can't be sure with you anymore," I responded, playing with my truck keys that were idling in my jean pocket.

"Hmm."

"I won't say it unless you look at me. Not just up through your eyelashes in that incredibly cute way, but seriously look up at me." _Did I just say that out loud? In that incredibly cute way? Well then, that's definitely going to help me now._

When she did look up I almost let loose one of those strangled sighs. She obviously did not want me to know what she was thinking because you could tell a little bit what she was feeling on her face, but her eyes were blank again. That wall or whatever was up again. I hadn't realized just how hard it was for her on something like this, although I really should've.

My best option at this point was to just say it; though, in all honesty, Massie was making me more nervous by the minute.

"Please don't do this again," I muttered.

"Don't do what?"

"I can't see _you,_" I answered, referring to the way I couldn't see past it.

Still, the look on her face was kind of priceless. "I really hope you're not being literal." Her gaze softened, although you could still tell she was freaking out, and would for a while most likely.

"That wall thing you do, I hate it."

"I know, but it's a reflex. It always has been… I think it always will be, unless someone can manage to break that." She shrugged slightly, but I was still relieved when her eyes seemed to show a little more. Massie was trying… because I wanted her to.

"You know, you really shouldn't be so worried about me hearing that," I noted.

"Ha ha, you're funny. No, I shouldn't be worried at all because the guy I've been dating for like twenty-two days finds out I love him, and for Pete's sake he wasn't even supposed to hear it," Massie pointed out. The wall was down again (thank God) but apparently she was feeling sarcastic, or trying to hide something again.

"I'm in love with you too."

One, not both, but one eyebrow almost went off of her forehead. "_Excuse me_?"

With slight difficulty, I managed to catch her gaze and hold it, repeating what I said moments ago.

"How can I be sure you're not lying?" she inquired softly.

"Do you trust me?"

Massie hesitated before firmly saying, "Yes."

"Then there's your answer, you just have to."

She was quiet, but thankfully, I knew that she believed me; I knew that I believed her. There would probably be a great deal of talking about it later, but for now we just had to go with it.

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Girls' Dorms<br>Saturday, January 14  
>7:45p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

"Then there's your answer, you just have to," Landon said simply, still boring into my eyes with his own. My head was tilted upwards ever so slightly, his downwards.

And I did, it was true. I had to trust him because I wasn't going to be one of those horribly repetitive girls who kept asking why this and why that. One day, probably soon, we'd have to talk about it, but it could wait a little bit.

I stood up finally, getting quite the curious look from him, and bent down to get something out of a drawer. It was, in fact, just a pen; the purpose was mainly to just recollect my thoughts briefly. Standing back up, I dusted myself off and swiveled around, nearly falling over backwards when I realized just how close he was behind me.

No, we are not doing this in slow motion. But any who, as to be expected (I mean at this point who _wouldn't_ be expecting it) Landon started leaning towards me, and I acted automatically. On what I assumed was his reflex, he held onto my waist while my hands started running through the back of his hair.

On a course of _majorly _bad timing (and slightly low intellect) Alicia walked in seconds after my back ended up against the wall. To make it worse, she started laughing.

"Well then, I see the king and queen of C-PAW (or compromising positions against walls) are busy, so I'll just grab this and be out of your hair for the rest of the night," she stated simply.

I was still against the wall, but now I was desperately wishing that it would vanish so I could disappear through it. Landon had taken a few steps backwards. We must have just had bad luck though, because that was the second time that had happened in just under a month.

She left the room with a rather suggestive grin in my direction, to which I responded by staring intently at the wall across the room.

"So, out of curiosity, are you rooming with Kristen and Derrick tonight or staying here?" I asked. Every other weekend it was split up. Sometimes it was just a random thing too; you never really knew with us.

"Technically, that's up to you, although I think the latter won't scar me nearly as much mentally," Landon answered.

"Meh, I don't care, do whatever you need to do." _Or want to do._

"Well then you already know the answer. So, I'll be back in like ten minutes or something. Wish me luck."

"Good luck." I said with a slight smirk.

He went off and I was very tempted to try and kick myself. Yes, the results of it all were good (He loved me too!), but at the same time, he was still not supposed to hear that. Of all people, I should know how thin these walls are towards the hallway.

I went into the bathroom, switching into my usual pajamas and releasing my ponytail to fluff out the hair. I went through the rest of it at ease. There was the click of the door, indicating he was back, just as I was brushing my teeth. I spit the white/blue foam into the sink and rinsed everything off.

When I walked back out there, Landon seemed to be having an internal conflict with himself. By that point it was just past eight.

"Hey, you survived," I noted, squatting down to look through the different movies. "Is there a specific movie you like?"

"Hmm? Oh, not really," he replied easily.

Once the movie was started and we were settled in, we started paying more attention to each other than the movie (which was quickly just becoming background noise). "You know, at least none of us –you never did actually- will have to listen to Alicia talk about finding her C-PAW anymore," I remarked.

"Yeah, what exactly is C-PAW?" he asked, seemingly nervously.

"We are now the king and queen of Compromising Positions Against Walls. Alicia is… odd. They all have one actually. And they'll all hear about it too, by the way."

"The things we get ourselves into. And I am curious about earlier…"

I bit my lip. "What part of earlier?"

"Why were you shouting your feelings to the world in the first place?" he inquired.

"Alicia was egging me on. I sometimes wonder if she plans these things…"

Landon chuckled. It was true, sometimes it seemed like Alicia _and _Derrick were trying to plan out our lives.

"You know, do you just want to turn this off?" he gestured to the television while speaking.

"Sure," I snickered.

He picked up the remote and turned the TV off, leaving us to just lay together in the darkness. One thing I'd noticed was that whenever we were sleeping, we faced each other. Josh and Olivia were the same way, but both Kristen and Alicia sat with their backs against their significant other's chest.

"Hey Mass?" he said at one point, both of us only minutes from sleeping.

"Hmm?"

"I love you…" I had no idea how good it would feel to hear that, especially when I knew it was real.

"I love you too."

**-:-**

**Kind of fluff-ay. Any who, chapter 25 is probably the last chapter, after much inner debating. On the upside, I'm not marking this as complete until I can put in the author's note that will be providing the link to the sequel. Yes, I am writing my first sequel. I'm actually excited for it! Ha ha, twenty-four will be here soon. **

**Anyways… Review?**

**Live. Laugh. Love.**

**-SDOW**


	25. Chapter25: We're Halfway There

**I'm pretty sure they're out by now, the calendar I was looking at wasn't all too clear and I don't actually attend this university so… But it looks like they should be able to leave by now, so yeah!... Here comes the end. **

**-:-**

**University of Iowa  
>Parking Lot<br>Monday, June 11  
>9:45a.m.<strong>

**LC;**

Many students had already left. Some remained either planning to take some summer classes or needed to finish up things. I looked at Massie when she shoved the last suitcase of hers into her car, smiling proudly. Mine were in the back of my truck already. All eight of us were going in a sort of caravan formation to Westchester.

Things between Massie and me were fantastic actually. All seven of us were a little sad that she was going to Montana on the twentieth to stay with her grandparents for a week or something, but we'd just have to deal. The worst part was that her Birthday was the twenty-second, and we wouldn't be there.

It felt really good to know that she loved me back; we seemed to grow closer ever since that January night. Her walking boot was, much to her enjoyment. The only problem was that the one time Derrick suggested tag; she was able to dodge all of us easily and climbed a tree with Kristen.

"Are you sure that this is a good idea?" I asked Derrick. We were both leaning against the back of my truck, watching the girls playfully bump each other around.

"Depends, what kind of energy drinks do they have?" he asked.

"I think Massie's using Full Throttle today and Amp tomorrow. Alicia has Red Bull for the whole way. Kristen got Monster and Amp. Olivia has Full Throttle, Red Bull, and a Monster," I relayed, craning my neck to see each one individually.

Derrick burst out laughing. "They did the same thing coming here back in August. Alicia's kind of neutral. But I can guarantee that Kristen is going to barge into your and Massie's hotel room tonight and get into a major pillow fight. Olivia will probably join them, although she has sugar and stuff all the time anyway. Alicia will either join them or start a hallway chase, just because it's fun."

"Oh, dear God please help me…"

"Don't try and take Massie's away, she'll probably flip out on you. Either that or distract you until she can get it back. It's more often the latter though, so be careful," he advised.

"I'm so glad we don't start giggling when we drink those absurd caffeinated things," Chris snorted, walking up beside us.

"Funny thing is, none of them have started drinking them yet," Josh added, coming up to us. We'd all requested and gotten the same rooms for next year, but were planning to switch around on our own a little bit for relationship's sake.

"Shouldn't we be going?" Massie yelled from across the parking lot, hopping down from the back of her car. Don't ask me why she was up there in the first place.

"Yep," all four of us guys said in unison.

Every single one of us climbed into their car. Massie into her Charger; Derrick in a truck similar to my own; Alicia into a BMW; Olivia into a convertible; Josh into a mustang; Kristen into Dodge Challenger; Chris into another truck. Josh was the only guy with a short car, if it wasn't obvious, but he loved it. He also claimed that he could join in the games easier in it, so it was okay.

The girls all pulled out, one by one, Massie in the front with Alicia, Kristen, and Olivia following in that order. She was the fastest driver out of all of them. We normally would've left earlier, but we didn't. Josh pulled up behind Olivia, followed by Derrick, me, and then Chris.

We drove for a while, but once we hit the interstate, I saw what he was talking about by caravan formation. The four girls, switched into the other lane, letting us come up closer to them. Derrick had explained to me earlier that Massie was known for speeding up out of sight, but would give warning with her headlights. They also flashed their headlights if they were going to pull into a rest stop.

Although it was illegal, and stupid, Alicia and Massie started to play road games with each other. Massie had all four of her windows down and had taken to using the one hand to drive. The other was just resting lazily on the side of her window. Her favorite sunglasses were propped on. I, on the other hand, was in plaid shorts and a T-shirt, my feet clad in a pair of black and white DC's.

Kristen and Olivia soon joined them though, and I swear they were playing some form of tag with their cars.

When I got up alongside Massie, I could hear that she had her music up quite loud… in fact, all of us did, even me. She had Nickleback going, which is what probably surprised me the most. I had no idea she was a fan. Hmm… music interests.

I tapped my steering wheel slightly and kept driving, switching the iPod songs every now and then. A few hours in, there was a chorus of four girl horns, all of them matching together in a beat, right as we passed the "Welcome to Illinois" sign.

I grinned. It was one state closer to New York and what would hopefully be a great summer.

There was a telltale flash from both Massie and Alicia. A series of responses came from the rest of our headlights before the two sped up and out of sight. Who knows what they were planning, other than their speeding ways.

Another hour later, with the girls finally back to us, we pulled off to fill our gas tanks and grab some food. Massie and I sat on the end of my truck, sharing nachos and looking at the hot sun. Her sunglasses were on her head, even though the sun was directly facing her.

"Shouldn't those be over your eyes?" I inquired.

"Please, I am not getting those circle shaped tan lines, Crane. I thought you knew me better than that," she pouted, taking a swig of her Amp.

"I really despise you drinking those. By the way, were you playing tag earlier?"

"Yep, I was hardly it though."

I was about to say something else when Alicia walked up. "Are you excited to get back to your Viper?" she asked Massie.

"Of course I am! After having to get rid of my first car, it's a great substitute."

"Wait, you have two cars?" I asked.

"Yep, the other is a Dodge Viper convertible. You'll see it more often when we get back. My Charger is more suitable for Iowa," Massie answered, smiling proudly at the thought of her babies.

"We're leaving!" Josh called.

"Crap," she muttered, hopping down. I got down after her and got a quick hug before we got in our separate cars again.

The driving for the last six hours of the day was normal. We stopped twice more for gas (once for the others, twice for the trucks). Normally I got better mileage, but we were going faster than usual.

Foot switching, cruise control, steering mechanisms, rare pit-stops, Massie's seemingly giggly mood from the energy drinks; I took it all in stride.

The sky was bright, a brilliant summer-produced blue. The sun shone down cheerily on us as we made our way home.

After ten hours of driving, we pulled up to the same hotel Massie and I had stayed at the time before, ready to end the day.

**-:-**

**Holiday Inn  
>Room 622<br>Monday, June 11  
>9:00p.m.<strong>

**MB;**

After a lot of driving that day, I was pretty steered out for a couple hours. Don't get me wrong, I love road trips, but the constant driving on my own mixed with the energy drinks was making me go a little haywire. I think Landon noticed too because he kept giving me strange looks.

Speaking of Landon, ever since I'd slipped that day, things seemed to be going good. Heck, I'd learned from my mistake… learned that mistakes are pretty freaking fantastic sometimes. I also learned that night that he'd been planning to talk to me that night anyway, which would be why he was there in the first place.

Any who, I was sitting back on the bed in the hotel room, finishing off the other energy drink I'd had that day. He gave it an unhappy glance before completely taking it out of my hand and holding it backwards.

"You need to stop drinking those," he reprimanded. We were laying the wrong way on the bed, heads by where the feet should be and feet up by the pillow.

"Landon, give me the thing back," I responded with a raised dare-you-to-test-this eyebrow.

"No."

I flipped over onto his chest and propped myself up. "Please? You do realize I'll crawl until I can reach it, right?"

"I figured, but I don't care 'cause you aren't getting it."

I was about to reach for it when I realized how awkward the situation could turn if I did. I sighed and let a growl-like snort out. He chuckled.

"Giving up?"

I nodded before leaning down to kiss him. Because I was just that rude, when I got him distracted, he automatically moved his hands forwards, enabling me to grab the can back. I sat back up, satisfied.

"I win." I finished it off and chucked the can in the garbage can.

"That is so cheating!" Landon groaned.

"Maybe, but maybe I'll spare you from a pillow fight now," I shrugged.

"I think I'll be spared either way," he said victoriously. I noticed my eyes widen. Oh no…

Alicia came bursting in with a "Now!". Landon picked me up and threw me over his shoulder, marching out of the room and depositing me in Alicia and Chris's.

"Traitor," I mumbled, whacking his back.

"That actually kind of hurt," he admitted.

"Good," I said with a playful smile. He shook his head, flashing me an adorable one-dimpled grin and leaving.

It was quiet for a minute. Olivia and Kristen were both their too. That left four girls, all high on energy drinks and supplied with pillows.

"So… the traitor left me. Pillow fight?"

"Pillow fight."

**-(0)-**

**10:15p.m.**

"Not that I don't love it, but what's with the Snookie-esque bump?" Landon asked when I walked back into the room.

"Olivia… At least I got to put hers in super high pigtails as revenge. Alicia has three braids. Kristen just has a bun on the top of her head… Like a tree," I stated, switching into a pair of ridiculously short boy-shorts and a tank top.

"And no, you don't have staring rights," I added, crawling under the covers. He raised his eyebrows, ignoring my comment and peeling off his T-shirt before he got in next to me. Apparently, unbeknownst to me, he always did it unless I was around. Up until Valentine's Day anyway… he took if off for bed that night after one of those cheesy romantic comedies and dinner.

I didn't completely lie down though, as I was still occupied with coming the teasing in my hair back down. Once it was fully situated, I laid down all the way and curled up against his chest.

"Big day tomorrow," he said quietly. "Get some sleep."

"You have to sleep too," I reminded him.

"That's true. I love you." I still felt amazing when I heard that.

"I love you too."

**-(0)-**

**Tuesday, June 12  
>6:00p.m.<strong>

We pulled up into New York after leaving at about 7:30 that morning. The first year of college was finally over, and I did it!

The summer, I just knew it, would be amazing.

Landon helped me a lot that year. He'd taken the time to break down that wall and show me that love is real, not a "derogatory statement". I had been in the dark, and he'd found the light switch for me and turned the lights on.

For that, I will be forever grateful. I'd found _A Light in the Dark._

**-:-**

"**So, I knew this is a little overdue, quite a few months actually, but was I right?" the professor asked, glancing between Landon and Massie.**

"**About what?" Massie asked, honestly not remembering why they were there again.**

"**Have your opinions on love changed, Massie?" he continued.**

**She smiled. "Actually, you're right. They have. I'm in love with Landon Crane. He showed me what the truth in it all was. It is very much a real thing, not to be taken for granted."**

"**How about you Landon?" **

**He ran his free hand through his raven black hair, his other occupied with Massie's hand. With a quick glance in her direction he grinned. **

"**Most definitely. I always thought that love was just something people made up in fairytales when they had no other thing in their life, but I was wrong. I'm in love with Massie Block. Best decision I ever made was to just keep trying." **

"**I thought so," the professor smiled at the pair. **

**The couple grinned at each other, that sweet look in both of their eyes.**

**-:-**

_**Fin. **_

**Well, technically anyway, the sequel is coming, so if you want to read it, wait for the author's note (That will come within a few days, for real) that contains the link. **

**Super thank you to all the people that ever reviewed. This includes:**

_entwined leather_

_bookie101_

_Laura_

_da1genius_

_ifandonlyif_

_Brianna_

_it's just real_

_winged wishes_

_Cliquemadkc_

_Would-You-Go-With-Me_

_Briony-rose_

**Any anonymous' that didn't leave a name. I think that's all. Thank you for reading this. Thank you so much also to all the people who put this on story alert, favorite, or author alert (for me in general I suppose). You guys are what gave me inspiration.**

**Edit: I believe at some point at a significantly later date, I will rewrite this. For now, it's left as is. Thank you, again, for all of your support.**

**xx**

**Laur**

**and the whispers commence**

**(previously SDOW or Seattle Dreams of Writing)**


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